#i can now bring this back for my new wife (sorry paul)

[bradshawsbaby]

Letters to My Love // Part X

Rosie the Riveter

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Pairing: Bob Floyd x Female Reader

Summary: When you signed up to volunteer with the USO, you never anticipated that you would meet a man like Ensign Robert Floyd. Fate brings you together one balmy spring evening in Charleston—the night before Bob is set to ship off across the Atlantic. Pen and paper become your only means of sharing your heart with the naval aviator who’s captivated it, igniting a correspondence that spans the distance between you. Can love blossom even as war rages and thousands of miles keep you apart?

Word Count: 2.9k

Author’s Note: I'm so sorry for how long it's taken me to update this story! One of my goals for 2024 is to get this series completed. Although it's taken me so long to update, Bobby and Peach are never far from my mind and are always in my heart. I hope you enjoy this latest installment of their story!

Set the Mood: If you’re looking for some 1940s vibes, check out the playlist I made to pair with the story.

The title of this chapter is obviously a tribute to the iconic figure of Rosie the Riveter. But it was also inspired by the song of the same name by The Four Vagabonds, which you can listen to here!

Dedication: As always, this story is dedicated to my dear friend, Clara (@luminousnotmatter). She was the first person to listen to all my endless ramblings about this universe, and she has never stopped supporting me or believing that I can get it finished. Thank you, Clara!

Warnings: Alternating POV, references to casualties of war and grief, slight angst, lots and lots of fluff.

July 8, 1943

My Dearest Peach,

I want to start by saying that I’m terribly sorry it’s taken me so long to respond to your last letter. I think I’ve worn down the paper to nearly nothing with how many times I’ve read it, but it’s been hard to get a free moment to sit and write you the response you deserve. Things are really heating up over here, and we have to be ready to move at a moment’s notice. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve sat down to start a new letter, only for us to be called up just as I set my pen to the paper.

To set your mind at ease, I want you to know that I’m alright. I’m not sure how much information they’re sharing with you all back home, but I know one of the fellas got a letter from his wife recently and she told him that three different families on their street got notified that their boys had been killed in action in just one week. It made her real scared that she was going to be the next one getting a knock on the door. I won’t lie to you, Peach, because I don’t think that’s fair—we’re losing a lot of men over here. It’s scary to think that any day now, it could be me they’re sending a flag home for.

I hate to start this letter off so morbidly, but there’s been something weighing on my mind lately, especially since my buddy got that letter from his wife. If anything happens to me over here, you won’t know. They’ll tell my family, sure, but not you. And I can’t stand the thought of you waiting for another letter that isn’t going to come. So I’ve spoken to Paul, Tommy Boy, and Benny about it. If anything happens to me over here, Peach, they’re going to write to you and let you know. It gives me some comfort to think that their words will be a little softer and kinder than the formality of Uncle Sam.

I hope this doesn’t make you sad, Peach, although I admit it makes me a bit sad to write. The truth is, I’m quite alright right now, like I said, and I don’t plan on letting anything happen to me over here. We have to take that drive to Folly Beach and get ice cream on the pier, after all. I tell you, that thought alone is enough to get me through even the hardest days over here.

Alright, enough of all this. Time to get back to your lovely letter. They’re calling us for dinner right now, but as soon as I’m finished, I’m coming right back to continue this letter. Nothing’s going to stop me from getting it to you.

I’m back, Peach. All the fellas were teasing me in the galley because of how quickly I scarfed down my dinner, but I didn’t care because I knew I was getting back to you and your sweet words, and that means a whole lot more than the crummy food they’re serving over here. Boy, I tell you, I sure do miss home-cooked meals. They even had—I’m not lying, I promise—they even had peach cobbler for dessert tonight. It made me think of you, but I’m sure it’s nowhere near as good as the cobbler your family makes, so I didn’t even bother giving it a taste.

Now I do have to say that you’re right, of course. I hate hearing you call yourself shy and mousey. If that’s the way you feel when I call myself boring, then I certainly promise I won’t ever do it again. It’s a deal—neither of us will talk about ourselves like that anymore.

Nothing you say could ever sound silly to me, Peach. Even though we only got to spend a few hours in each other’s company, your letters have made me feel like we’ve known each other for years and years. I’m honored that I’ve been able to make you feel seen. I do see you, Peach. You’re the most beautiful, interesting, intelligent girl I’ve ever known, and I hope you can see that in yourself. For what it’s worth, you’ve helped me to come out of my shell, too. Paul was just saying the other day that I look like a new man—that I’m standing taller and seem more confident than he’s ever seen in all the years he’s known me. I had just finished reading one of your letters when he said that. I don’t think that’s a coincidence. You’re turning me into a new man, Peach, and I like it. I like it a lot.

I’m glad that you passed along my well wishes to Emily. Even though part of me still thinks her fiancé is a dunce, I do wish them all the best. Has she heard from Eddie? I don’t know where he’s stationed, but if you’d like to find out and send the information to me, I can try to keep an ear out. How has the wedding planning been going? I’m still confident you’re going to make the prettiest bridesmaid.

I did pass along your invitation in my last letter home to my family, and my mother said she would certainly inquire after the Sheridan residence should she ever happen to find herself in Charleston. I think she’s happy that you and I are still writing to each other. She’s even happier about the thought of swapping recipes with you. Watch out—if the two of you ever do meet, I think she’ll hold you hostage in the kitchen all day.

Now I am very proud to hear about all the fine work you and Dottie have been doing with your Victory Garden. I’m sure there must have been a lot of progress since you last wrote to me! I eagerly await news about the beans, carrots, cucumbers, and tomatoes. I’m sure you’ve been able to make lots of hearty soups and healthy salads. My mouth is watering at the notion. Like I said, the food in the galley has been pretty crummy lately.

I’m sorry to hear there’s been some trouble back home. I’m sure it can’t be easy for anyone, with all the rationing and the fear and the worry. I promise that we’re doing our best over here to bring this war to an end quickly so that life can return to normal for all of you over there. For us, too. We really can’t wait to be home again.

Peach, I want you to know that it is our duty, our honor, and, quite frankly, our privilege to be fighting for you over here. I know the other fellas would agree with me saying so. So I don’t want you to feel like you have to do anything at home to “earn” us fighting for you. That said, I think it’s incredible that you want to contribute to the war effort in that way. I’m sure you haven’t been waiting for my response or my approval—which you shouldn’t, by the way—but I give a wholehearted yes to you applying for that position at the air station. We just recently saw Mr. Norman Rockwell’s illustration of Rosie the Riveter on the cover of the Post, and I have to say that I think you’d wear those coveralls a hundred times better.

I’m so proud of you, Peach. I want you to know that.

Speaking of the war effort, we have a couple big campaigns coming up very soon. I can’t say much more than that, but your well wishes and prayers for success would be very much appreciated. I’m always thankful for them.

Until next time, Peach! I’m already counting down the days until your next letter arrives.

Most Truly Yours,

Bobby

P.S. I almost forgot! I told Paul how much you loved the fact that he sends drawings home to Clara and Paul, Jr.—by the way, that reminds me, how is little Frankie doing?—and he was more than happy to create a few illustrations for you. He did a couple portraits—one of me and one of you, based off your beautiful photograph. He said to apologize that he’s too much of an amateur to capture all of your beauty. He did say that he thought he did a fine enough job capturing my likeness—I’m telling you, Peach, I think my friends officially like you better than they like me. Anyway, I hope you enjoy!

July 31, 1943

My Dearest Bobby,

Please don’t ever feel like you need to apologize for how long it takes you to write back to me. I can only imagine how difficult it is to find the time to write with everything that must be happening over there, and yet you always find the time to pen the most thoughtful and wonderful letters. I cherish each and every one of them, and I promise that I’m more than content to read your old letters as I await the new ones.

I’m so sorry to hear about how many of our boys we’re losing. Just last week, our neighbors, the Pattersons—you remember I mentioned Mrs. Patterson had helped me and Dottie with our Victory Garden?—received news that their son, Clarence was killed in action in France. It was devastating. Dottie and I had just been coming home from the grocery store when we saw the officer standing on their front steps with a telegram in hand. We knew what that meant. Mrs. Patterson has been inconsolable since. Mr. Patterson is equally devastated, but I think he’s trying to be strong for her. Dottie and I have been taking turns cooking meals for them and spending some time over at their house. We just want them to know that they’re not alone.

I admit, Bobby, that every time I hear news of someone else being lost in this war, I immediately think of you. It feels selfish, but I’m always so relieved when the news is about someone else and not you. I don’t know how I would bear it. I pray every day that I never have to receive that letter from Paul or Tommy Boy or Benny, but I am touched that you’ve thought about how I could be notified. Oh, Bobby, I hope more than anything that your parents never have to experience what the Pattersons are going through.

But you’re right—you’re going to come home safely. We have too many plans for you to do otherwise!

I’m sorry to hear that the food aboard your carrier has been so crummy lately. I wish that I could whip up a home-cooked feast and send it in the mail with my letters. Every time I sit down to dinner now, I think of all of you, and I count my blessings. Things aren’t perfect on the homefront, but I know that we certainly have no room to complain with all you boys are going through. I promise to have a peach cobbler waiting for you when you come home—and a pumpkin pie, for good measure.

If I’m turning you into a new man, Bobby, then you simply must know that you’re turning me into a new woman as well. I hardly remember the girl that I was before I met you. Can you believe that it’s been over a year now since our paths first crossed? I feel like my life is totally different now. The way that I see myself, the way I interact with others, the way that I’m not so terrified to step out of my comfort zone anymore—so much of that is thanks to you, Bobby. I’m still me, of course. But I feel like I’m a stronger, braver version of myself now. I like it, too.

It’s so kind of you to offer to keep an ear out for Eddie’s infantry! Emily received a letter from him around the same time that I received my letter from you, and he seems to be doing well, same as you, thank goodness. Eddie is part of the 1st Infantry Division. Emily said that last she knew, he was stationed somewhere near the Rhineland. The wedding planning has been going very well. Pretty much everything is set now—all we need is the groom. Emily can’t wait for Eddie to come home for good. Once he does, they’ll be able to officially set the date. Us bridesmaids are going to be wearing lilac-colored dresses. Dottie says she already knows how she’s going to style my hair. I hope that you’re home, too, when the wedding finally happens. Emily said that I could invite you to be my date. Only if you’d like that, of course.

I would be very happy to be kept hostage in the kitchen with your mother! I’m sure there’s so much I could learn from her, and it sounds like a splendid way to spend the day. I look forward to meeting her one of these days!

Oh, the Victory Garden, Bobby! You wouldn’t believe how it’s grown! Trust me, no one is more shocked than me and Dottie. Well, maybe Paddy. He knows firsthand what brown thumbs my sister and I normally have. At first, we weren’t so sure what was going to happen—the cucumbers seemed a bit small and some of the tomatoes didn’t really take. But by the end of June, everything was thriving! It’s been such a joy to watch, and I have to admit, both Dottie and I are feeling extremely accomplished. Frankie loves to spend time in the garden with us, although he spends a bit more time digging in the dirt than helping us pick vegetables, I’m afraid. Now that we’re in the middle of summer, we’re experimenting with zucchini and eggplant. We might also try radishes and turnips. We’re turning into quite the farmers! If your mother has any recipes to share, we’d be more than grateful and happy to try them out!

Now I admit that I’ve saved the most exciting news for last. At the beginning of June, I decided to go for it and I applied for the position at the air station in Goose Creek, the one Paddy told me about. I’m sure being his sister-in-law gave me a bit of an advantage, but it only took a couple days for me to hear back from them. I got the job! I’ve officially been working on the assembly line since the middle of June. It’s hard work, and I’ve never been so tired in all my life, but I have to say that I’m really proud of the work we’re doing. It’s funny that you mention Rosie the Riveter—my job these past few weeks has actually been to fasten pieces of the planes we’re assembling with rivets! So I guess you could call me Peach the Riveter. Doesn’t have quite the same ring though, does it?

I know that the chances are small that anything I’m helping to build is going to reach you specifically, Bobby, but I can’t help but smile every time we finish a new part, or get a new plane put together. I imagine you and Paul, or Tommy Boy or Benny hopping inside and it brings me more pleasure and pride than I could possibly explain. I feel like I’m doing something important, something meaningful and special. If spending hours riveting until my fingers turn numb brings you home even a day faster, then it will all have been worth it. And it gives me a real sense of purpose, driving to work each day with Paddy. I feel proud of myself.

I’ve made some new friends at work, too! Florence and Virginia—we call them Florie and Ginny—are the loveliest, kindest girls. They had already been working on the assembly line for a few months before I got the job, so they’ve been showing me the ropes and teaching me everything they know. They’ve made me feel so welcome, so a part of things. I have to admit that I was terrified my first week or so, terrified that I was going to mess something up or make a fool of myself. But I’ve settled in quite well, thankfully.

It means a lot to me to know that I have your support, Bobby. Truly, it does. Thinking of you and all that you’re doing to protect us is what really motivated me to take this job, so thank you.

Of course I’m sending all my best wishes for the campaigns you have coming up! Wherever you are right now, I pray that you’re safe and that your missions are successful.

You’re so brave, Bobby. Have I told you that lately? Even if I have, you deserve to hear it again. I’m so, so proud of you. You’re my hero.

I hope this letter gets to you soon. I wish it could grow wings and fly to you. I know time is going to pass so slowly until I’m holding a new letter from you in my hands. But until then, Bobby, I’m thinking of you and holding you in my heart.

Most Truly and Affectionately Yours,

Peach

P.S. Paul is quite the artist!!! I now have his portraits hanging right beside the photographs you sent me. Please tell him how talented I think he is, and how much I love the drawings he made for me! I was especially touched by the little note he wrote me on the back of your portrait. I hope he’s doing well. Send my best to him and Tommy Boy and Benny!

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[meredith-harper81]

I’ve Always Loved You💔

She Moved On

Chapter 1:

Paring : Chris Evans x Lana Parker

Word Count: 2k

Chris Pov

I had already gotten messages from my family and friends wishing me all the best and saying they couldn't wait to see me super soon.

I look up from my phone, and the black SUV arrives. I open the door and get in.

"Ready to go, Chris?" Megan asks me as she hands me a Bud Light seltzer.

"Ready as I will ever be," I smile, opening the can and taking a sip to cool my nerves. I am so nervous and excited about tonight. It would be my last premiere for awhile, and nobody knows just yet.

"Okay, so nobody knows the news except for me and your agency, so when the media ask about your next project, just try to project them away from asking more questions, or I will try my best to drift the question away," Megan tells me, and all I do is nod.

The driver pulls out of the driveway, and we are on our way to the Dolby Theater.

After a twenty-minute drive, we pull in, and I can hear people shouting. I get out of the SUV and wave to some people, and Megan directs me along to the carpet to take some photos and answer some questions about the movie.

I'm waiting in line and can't help but notice Ryan and Ana both have their families with them tonight. Ana brought her boyfriend Paul, and Ryan is here with his kids and wife, and I feel a little jealous of them and their loved ones tonight.

Normally I would bring my brother or family to events like these, but everyone is busy living their lives.

...

I take some pictures, greet some fans, and answer some questions about the movie and some even about what I'm wearing tonight, and then we get pulled into a group photo with the rest of the cast. I look around me, and everybody just looks so happy and content, but the dagger in my heart is bleeding out bit by bit every day. I just wish she was here to support me like she always did.

After we got introduced on stage, I am sitting by the bar, and for some reason, I can't get her out of my head tonight...

'Lana Parker'

The only love of my life.

We were once engaged in 2019 and even supposed to get married, but I ended things with her on a bad note, half of which I don't even remember.

I just remember walking out. It was one of my biggest mistakes, and I still regret it to this day.

It had to do with my career. We were supposed to get married, and I was going to quit acting, but—I can't remember—I lashed out at her and woke up the next morning and left her.

I sold my house and moved to LA, and most of my belongings were placed in a storage unit with the help of Ma and Tara. I stayed down here during the lockdown and just worked for three years.

My family was really mad and didn't talk to me for a few months, but eventually we made up when Shanna got married. Now that Scott is engaged... I'm thinking about going back to Boston and trying again with her unless she's moved on or found someone else.

I was deep in my thoughts when Ana came up with her boyfriend, Paul.

"Chris I want you to meet Paul," Ana says.

I get out of my seat and pull my hand forward to greet him.

"Oh yeah, man, how are you? I say I'm pulling him into a hug.

"Good, good. Huge fan," he says and pulls back.

"Thanks. Nice. So let's get a picture. I say, breaking the awkward tension. He nods, and Ana takes the photo.

"And I guess Paul is on to his next victim," Ana jokes as she orders an old-fashioned.

I smile and finish my beer.

"So rumors say Chris Evans is retiring soon? Is that right? She asks me, taking some of the beer nuts I have in front of me.

My head is hung low, and all I do is nod.

"That's great, Chris. So are you planning on settling down with Lana soon?"

I look up at her, and she immediately has a look of regret on her face.

"I'm so sorry I didn't mean to; it just slipped out since you guys were last together," she says.

"It's okay. Umm, I'm not sure. I need to get to Boston first," I say, looking at the time, which reads 6:45 p.m. I get up and tell Ana to have a good night.

I decided not to go to the after-party and just head back home to Dodger Stadium and finish packing.

Once the car service arrived at the gate, I gave him some cash and walked inside, where I was greeted by Dodger. I know he is probably hungry, and with all the moving boxes and things, I can't find anything.

"Yeah, Bubba, hold on," I say, finding the bag behind some random moving box near the living room. I scoop a few cups and place them in his dog bowl.

Meanwhile, I head to the bedroom, change out of this suit, and take a much-needed shower to wash all the stress of tonight off.

After my shower, I warm up some leftovers from last night and sit down to eat when a whiny Dodger comes by with his puppy eyes.

Which either means he did something bad or wants me to grab his favorite dog toy, which he probably tossed somewhere.

I get up and start looking under the sofa, and I'm about to give up when I find the darn lizard's tail hidden under the curtain.

I walk over and lift the curtain, pick up the stuffed animal, throw it across the room, and step on something cold.

I pick it up, and it's a gold infinity necklace. I open the clasp, put it around my neck alongside my Christopher necklace, and go back to eating dinner.

I remember Lana losing this necklace when I brought her here for a week, and she loved this necklace in an Instagram ad. I bought it for her and surprised her, and the look on her face when she lost it was devastating.

I wonder if she's doing well or has moved on. I haven't had the time to keep a tab on her, but I miss her so much.

I pull out my wallet and put my hand over the picture I have of us laughing, taken at Ma's house one Christmas. She is sitting on my lap, laughing at something I said.

I take out the engagement ring I remember taking off of her and throwing it.

I regret that day so much. I was so drunk, I don't even remember it. Ma was the one who found the ring and gave it to me at Shanna's wedding, and since then I've kept it in my wallet.

.....

I was leaving LA for good and leaving my house to my pal Jimmy to look after and move into.

After dinner, I take all my boxes with my personal belongings and place them in my room. I will deal with them later in life if ever needed. I call Ma, letting her know I will be home by early lunch, and she answers very coldly and tells me it's okay.

And after tonight, I'm ready to settle down and start a family of my own.

I mean, I'm forty-one, for crying out loud. These swimmers are even more likely to drown if I don't plant them somewhere.

I started up at the ceiling, daydreaming about how my life would have been if I didn't leave Boston; maybe I would've had a family of my own... I turn off the lamp and Dodger layers next to me, and I give him some cuddles and try to get some good shut-eye.

...

I've just landed in Boston, and before I left LA, I met up with Megan. She told me to just give her a call, and she can have statements sent and ready for the press. She gave me a hug, wished me all the best, and hoped I got the family I'd longed for.

I grab Dodger's leash and have him sit in the car as I load my things in the back. I run over to the other side, and the Uber takes off for Ma's home.

When the driver drops me off, Dodger runs off to the front door while I am slowly wheeling in my two suitcases.

I walk over to the front door and ring the bell and knock, but nothing happens.

I look under the mat and see the spare key. I use it and let Dodger in, and he starts to sniff around and bark, plants himself on the sofa, and goes to sleep. I walk further into the house.

"Ma?" I walk over and see a note on the table with a key.

The note said my room for a while is in the basement, and this is the key for the basement, and lunch is in the oven, and Ma is out with a friend.

Since when does Ma go out on a Friday afternoon? I shrug it off, and I wheel my things down to the basement.

I head downstairs, walk into one of the guest bedrooms, and decide to take a shower. After my shower, I head back upstairs and notice Ma is still not home. I heat up some food, eat it, and decide to take Dodger on a walk to his favorite park, which we used to go to all the time.

I pull on some running shoes and take his leash, and we take off. I text Tara, letting her know I need to find a new place, and we decide to meet up for dinner at Ma's tonight.

I've known Tara since I was in middle school; she has been one of my all-time best friends, but she and Lana never got along. I sort of remember Tara always bringing something up about Lana being selfish or using me for her money.

Recently, Tara got a divorce, and I wasn't there. I feel like a shy friend, so I also need to make up for that. Ma is inviting all my siblings for dinner tonight, and I called Tara and invited her as well.

...

I arrive at the park, and as I let Dodger off his leash, I notice it isn't busy for a Friday afternoon. Which I find a little strange.

I walk over to one of the beaches and take a seat, watching Dodger jump around, waggling his tail. I had a huge smile on my face. I really missed this place, and by the looks of it, so did Dodger.

After I let Dodger run around in the dog park, I called him over, and just as I put on his leash, he took off, catching me off guard. He starts to run in the other direction, running at full speed.

"Dodger! Bubba Stop! I yell after him, trying to catch up, but he is not stopping; in fact, he is running faster now.

What has gotten into him?

Dodger keeps running off across the dog park to the larger area of what looks like a children's park.

As I catch my breath, I hear a little baby crying, and Dodger is running faster.

I catch up to Dodger, and when I look up, I see him lying on top of a little girl as she giggles and Dodger licks her face.

The little girl is cooing to Dodger in some sort of baby nonsense...

I find it weird that Dodger only plants himself on humans he knows, and he is fully playing around with this baby he's never met.

"Dodger, you don't do that," I say, and I grab his leash, pulling him a little back off of her. I get a good look at this girl; she is wearing overalls, has pigtails, and has bright blue eyes.

I look at her jeans, and they are a little ripped, and she has a cut. I'm guessing she tripped on the tree root. I look around us, but I don't see anyone near us. I wonder where she came from and where her parents are.

"Swilly Doggy," I hear the little girl say as she is underneath Dodger and still giggling. I smile and move Dodger a little off of her.

"Hi, my name is Chris, and this is Dodger," I say, smiling and getting on her level.

"My nawe is Awia," she babbles as she pets Dodger as he starts to lick her tiny finger.

"Well, nice to meet you, Awia. Where is your mama? I say it, and then I hear it.

"Mawa," she says as her head turns, looking around.

"ARIA! ARIA, HONEY, WHERE ARE YOU? I hear a voice coming closer.

Just as I was turning, Dodger got up and ran across the grass, and I pulled him by his leash this time.

"Oh, my God, Aria. Here you are." I hear a voice coming closer. The voice... Lana's voice.

It's like the wind is sucking the wind out of me. It can't be, and then I see her standing far across the sidewalk. Her hair is in a ponytail, and she's wearing jeans with a black long-sleeved shirt. She's more beautiful than I can remember. Dodger gets up and runs toward Lana, almost taking her down.

Lana makes eye contact with me and wastes no time running up to the little girl and grabbing her, pulling her to her chest as she lets out a deep breath and kisses her head.

"Aria doesn't scare me like that. You were supposed to stay with Steven," she says.

"Ouchie, mawa," Aria says, pointing to her leg.

"Mawa, look dodgy doggy, Aria says as she gets distracted from what she was saying. Lana holds her close, kissing her chubby cheeks.

Just as I was about to say something, another man walked up to them.

I look over, and I don't see Lana wearing a ring or even this man.

"Oh my god, Aria," he says as he reaches and rubs her back, and Aria clings to her mother.

"Thank you; have a good day, Mr.," she says, leaving me and Dodger both baffled.

'Mister?' Did she really call me Mister?

"LANA!" I yell after her and I see her walk faster.

I see Lana walking away as Aria is babbling some more baby talk and waving to us, and Dodger is barking and nudging my leg to follow.

I am just frozen. Lana moved on and now has a baby. Maybe she's even married. I couldn't even get a word in, and she just walked away like nothing had happened. She didn't even acknowledge me or Dodger, and she just walked away. Did she not recognize me? I'm utterly shocked, as Dodger is whining.

...

I walk home with so many questions in my mind. I open the front door and take my shoes off, and Dodger runs into the kitchen, and I can smell Ma making something. I follow Dodger, and I walk in and see Ma in the kitchen cleaning up.

"Hey Ma," I say, walking over and hugging her.

"Welcome back home; how are you? She asks

"I just saw Lana in the park with her daughter," I say, and Ma's face changes all of a sudden.

Yeah, she had a baby two years ago after you left," Ma says while she rubs my back.

"I'm so sorry, Christopher," Ma says as she rubs my back.

"Are you ever going to tell me what happened between the two of you? Ma says, and I just look at her, and she frowns.

"You should get ready for dinner; everyone is coming soon. I nod and walk downstairs to get ready for tonight.

[screechingsandwichhologram]

my amrev ocs if they had tumblr

🌓 dressedsword

HOLY SHIT PAUL REVERE JUST RODE THROUGH TOWN HOLY FUCK ITS HAPPENING

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why r you blogging and not fighting. fake ass

🌓 dressedsword

bitch i'm a fucking woman. can't exactly pull up to fort william and mary in stays now can i

🐴 pennsylvaniarifle Follow

not if ur coward

35 notes

🐏 tumblefarmer

man we kicked their fucking assesss let's goooo !!! first fight of rebellion woooo !!!

👒 spindledpoet

..... i'm glad you made it back home but not sure we should be celebrating the beginning of what certainly will become a war

🌓 dressedsword

john shut the fuck up ur just salty sam trampled ur flowers on his way out of the house

5 notes

🌺 massalilly Follow

FIRST SHOTS FIRED IN LEXINGTON AND CONCORD HOLY SHIT

🐏 tumblefarmer

WHAT THE FUCK MASSHOLES RUIN EVERYTHING

17,756 notes

👒 spindledpoet

hey guys is coughing up blood normal

💦 pantingmanthing Follow

NO???

👒 spindledpoet

damn

12 notes

👣 sandyfootprints Follow

god war fucking sucks. first day on the job and im spitting out some dudes blood. he probably had a wife. cant even drink bc they told us not to

❣ crimsonfingerlicking

yummy

👣 sandyfootprints Follow

why am i on tumblr

67 notes

🐏 tumblefarmer

guys. i really really really wanna join the war. is that a good idea. my cousin is ill and his sister is unmarried but i cant just stand by. i cant leave them but i must fight for my homeland and for the freedom my ancestors were promised

🫡 kissingcontinental Follow

join us we need men so so bad plsss

🪶 writerlover Follow

fight to build a better tomorrow for your family

🐏 tumblefarmer

okay im doing it!!! going down to mass this weekend

23 notes

🌓 dressedsword

hey so like. is. is. do we think that. maybe in the new country we could like. idk . maybe uhhh. give women rights?

1 note

🐏 tumblefarmer

guys war sucks ass its so fucking boring im just sitting in camp. a guy just fucking sneezed in my food. i hate it here

🌹rosedlionheart Follow

thats what you yankees get for picking a fight with the strongest army in the world

🐏 tumblefarmer

doesnt ur king piss blue

784 notes

🫶 letteredolley Follow

damn my fav dress maker is too sick to make me a new dress :// fuck my life

🐓 kickerchicker Follow

girl we are in the middle of a war that is Not the thing to worry about

💋 marieantoinette Follow

god forbid women do anything

🥖 lalanterne Follow

wrong dash. ur time will come

1,789 notes

🕯️carpediemcandled Follow

aw fuck the cute boy that was stationed near me just fucking died from camp fever </3

🕯️ carpediemcandled Follow

he was so cute too :// a french canadian farmer from new hampshire that was like. super into sheep and goats. he was super clumsy too. but like in a cute way

🕯️ carpediemcandled Follow

aughhhh :((( i was going to bring him one of my nice candles :(((

10 notes

🌓 dressedsword

FUCK

0 notes

👒 spindledpoet

yknow that feeling you get when you look at your reflection and you feel like you are going to throw up

🙏 universalfriend Follow

yes

👒 spindledpoet

thanks

7 notes

❣️crimsonfingerlicking

is there.... money? in war

🦁 redbloodedredcoat Follow

dm me

2 notes

🦋 painfulpoet Follow

@ spindledpoet are you , okay??

👒 spindledpoet

i have a horrible thing inside me that i understand now but i can not continue. i am dying.

👒 spindledpoet

please do not let them forget that i was among you

9 notes

👒 spindledpoet

i am making a dress. i must finish it. it will be the best yet. it will be my last one. delphine needs the dress. she needs the dress. i need the dress

1 notes

🦋 painfulpoet Follow

@ dressedsword hey is ur brother okay?

🌓 dressedsword

he is very ill and delirious often. our cousin has died in the war. i have little means of supporting us and he is too sick to leave the bed. when he is aware he cries and writes. his handwriting has spoiled

🌓 dressedsword

he is not for long. he will be gone before any letter or parcel of yours will travel the atlantic. i am sorry

4 notes

👒 spindledpoet

i don't want to hurt my sister but delphine is waiting for me

0 notes

��� dressedsword

gonna log off for a bit

1 notes

🌗 designedpamphlet Follow

shit. i'm fucking doing this

0 notes

[spacedoutman]

【𝐀 𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐡 𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐡 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐰𝐨 | 𝐊𝐢𝐬𝐬 𝐚𝐮】 [Repost]

(𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐭 3)

Chapter description: Paul Stanley watches a new actor, Vince Neil, be roped into the grueling life the entertainment industry brings as the movie set sits on the verge of going up in flames. Their director, Vinnie Vincent, will make sure they all burn with it.

♥ Peter Criss x Paul Stanley

Note: I actually love Vinnie Vincent dearly but I want to write him as a villain for this story so I think it'll be fun!

Warnings: Panic attack / Mental exhaustion

𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝟏 / 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝟐 / 𝐚𝐨𝟑

“Cut!”

Paul exhaled. His shoulders—tight as stretched leather—relaxed. The air rolled over his parted lips. He looked up at the color drained set. Papers, covered top to bottom in lines written in chicken scratch, hung loosely taped anywhere the camera wouldn’t catch. Right behind that teal cabinet? Check. At the back of the oven… Check.

“You did excellently.” The director’s soothing voice silenced the cast.

Bruce Kulick leaned against the counter, glaring at a golden watch with a gun on his belt. Eric Singer stood in the doorway. Tears stained his cheeks. His sunken eyes hung ungodly wide. Paul’s eyes flitted in front of him. A small man with a head of fluffy blond hair looked up at him. White crowded the young man’s irises. His hands shook a bit.

“Mister Neil, you’re looking awfully nervous.” The director’s cynical-steeped voice stiffened the actor. “We’re going to have to shoot the scene again.”

Paul caught his head before it hung. He fought himself not to groan. His guts sunk with his heart. ‘One more time and it’ll be done..’ He thought as he went to rub his eyes but stopped. His makeup couldn’t be smudged. Bruce sighed tiredly. Eric walked out.

“I’m so sorry.” ‘Mister Neil’ said through a shaky but loud voice.

Paul’s eyes hit the director. Vincent Cusano, or privately, Vinnie Vincent, popped open a magazine. The dim light from the set grasped a playboy logo. His discontented eyes scanned each page in a giffy. The crew chattering filled the place like an ocean. Paul’s head rang.

“It’s fine.” Paul stated, softening a bit. “For your first, I can’t imagine it’s easy remembering five-hundred words and specifically how to say them.”

Vince looked down and away. He furrowed his brows, sighing sharply. Bruce casually strode over. He put his hands on his hips.

“We’re almost through with this scene, so all should be fine.” Bruce eased. “Vince. You’re really doing good for a first.”

Another actor sat up from the marble tiles. The chalk outline rubbed off on his skin. He sighed, closing his eyes tightly. “Can I pull off the wig?” He groaned. Vince nodded. “I auditioned for anything but this!” He sounded like he’d explode.

“Alright, detective Stanley,” Bruce sassed, half-smiling. “I guess it’s time for a break.”

“For a couple seconds? I may as well stay put.” Paul huffed.

Bruce chuckled. Paul couldn’t help but to smile. “You can at least sit down.”

“You’re right..”

Later.

“You killed my wife.. and now, you are to make it up to me.”

Paul said in a voice colder than stone. He clutched Vince’s tie. The two stood a breath away from nose to nose. Vince narrowed his eyes. He clasped Paul’s wrist. Paul grimaced.

“It was your slacking that-” He glanced over Paul’s shoulder at the street light “.. That,”

Paul’s heart skipped. Wind roared, almost knocking the two off their feet. “-That what?” He growled through his clenched jaw.

“-Killed your wife! Leaving you stuck in a denial that only spits on her legacy!”

“Now you and your denial spit on her legacy.” Paul whispered quickly, trying his best not to move his mouth much. “You’re left soaking in bitterness-”

“CUT!!”

Paul’s stomach plummeted. He trembled as cold scorched through his suit. Vince slumped, closing his eyes a bit tight. Paul reassuringly brushed a hand against his shoulder. Cusano sighed loudly.

“Places!” He demanded snottily as he tossed up a finger. “Neil, you’ve forgotten your lines again-”

Vince’s jaw clenched so hard his teeth would bust. Paul frowned slightly, wrinkling his brow. “Careful-”

“I fucking got that!!” Vince barked. Vinnie glanced from his magazine, unfazed. “Lighten the hell up, piss bag!”

“I said places!” Vinnie clapped lightly. Twice.

Paul wished he’d had Vince’s courage—or adrenaline to stand up… or privilege to stand up for himself. A little resentment boiled. Vince trudged across the city street. The camera stalked him. The wind barreled through his hair. The air smelled like ice. Paul frowned deeply. He could already hear the director firing him if he’d spoke up in Vince’s position.

The paper—with Vince’s lines on it, spiraled away in the wind. Vince shouted a slew of curses and took off after it. Paul’s feet ached like he’d been running all day. The shoes crushing them every time he even shifted didn’t help either. Vince’s eyes glittered with spirit. The thought of them going dull turned Paul’s stomach. He sighed.

A little later.

“Neil, I want you to look into Stanley’s eyes. It needs to be savory. It needs to be hurt.”

“Bravo, Stanley. Your performance is incredible. I’d change the way you’re standing, though. Both feet point toward him displays security, while if you have one pointed out, it creates a sense of instability.”

“Kulick, try taking a more intimidating approach. Imagine you’re actually threatening someone, with all due respect.”

Cold water pricked Paul as it trickled down his face. He gasped. It raced down his neck. He wiped his hair from his face and pressed a rag against it. Tears stung his eyes. He was convinced he’d pulled his head from a fire. His ribs tightened. His spine curled inward. His knees crashed into the cool tiles. He buckled, catching himself on one hand as he trembled wildly.

His brain fought to explode through his skull. Pulsing thudded in his ears. He dragged himself forward, falling on his ass and against the bathtub rim. He laid his head on his arm. Prickling stung his legs. His throat squeezed. ‘When will this end?’ He thought to himself. ‘What happens after I retire?’ Vomit crawled to the top of his throat.

In a flash, he burst into violent sobs. The phone rang. Paul couldn’t count how long it had been. He wobbled to the sound, clutching the towel against his face. He prayed the windows were shut. He staggered across the bedroom floor, dragging his stiff legs and heavy feet like stilts. He stopped. He peeked through the rag. His phone. He put it to his ear.

[she-karev]

Aftermath

Age Rating: 12+

Chapters: Three of Three

Fandom: Grey’s Anatomy

AN: Here’s the final chapter guys, I hope you like it and I’ll try to post most stories by next weekend.

Summary: Amber gets a feedback from Webber about the meeting when her friends barge in.

Words: 2920

I stand by the nurse’s station outside Paul’s ICU room drinking my water to relax. Alex, Jo and Jenny are right outside the door waiting for Dr. Shepherd exam to determine if he’s brain dead. Grey and Jo were able to bring him back but they had to intubate him on a ventilator. Shepherd diagnosed him with second impact syndrome which never ends well in this case.

It’s weird him dying was something I thought would bring me joy but instead…it made me feel defeated. Paul died before we could press charges and expose him for the misogynistic, abusive low life he really is…was. In the end it just felt pointless everything he put us through when he’s not gonna pay for it. I can only hope that hell is real and he gets a special seat. I see Andrew entering the ICU and walk to me relieved.

“You’re okay.” Andrew exhales relieved.

“Yeah, I’m okay.” I put my water down to face him, “I take it the grapevine heard what happened.”

“Only that Stadler tried to attack Dr. Wilson and an intern. I came up as soon as I heard. Do I need to kick his ass?”

I look at him touched but point at Paul behind him. He looks and see’s the damage, “Even if you could kick his ass, I don’t think his brain would register it.”

Andrew looks back at me with a slightly feared look, “Did you do that to him?” I lightly smack his arm.

“He fell and hit his head after his fiancé told him she was gonna turn him in.” Andrew nods relieved, “His first concussion barely healed so the impact caused a brain bleed I think, we’ll know more once Dr. Shepherd confirms it.” I see Dr. Shepherd coming out and we stand by the others to get the news.

“Is he brain dead?” Jo asks plainly.

“We can’t say for certainty for a few more hours, but it appears the way.” Amelia explains and looks at Jo conflicted on what to say, “I’m-I’m very…I’m sorry. Are you comfortable talking to her about her options?”

Jo nods, “Yes.”

Amelia leaves us as Jenny asks Jo, “What does she mean by options?”

Alex explains, “Well she means you have to decide if you want to withdraw his life support.”

“Alex.” Meredith calls him and he turns to her, “It’s not up to her.”

I look at her confused for a second until I realize what she’s saying. Since the divorce wasn’t finalized before Paul went on a vent, Jo is still legally his wife. Which means this depraved shell of a man’s final wishes falls on her. I shake my head at the cruel outcome of this and Andrew realizes it too as he rubs my back in a futile attempt at comfort.

“Oh my god.” Jo makes the realization too, “It’s me. I’m still legally his wife.” There’s a tense second of silence until the next sound out of Jo catches me completely off guard. She laughs out with a smile, “Oh my god!”

I look at Jo startled by her reaction as she continues to laugh hysterically despite the tension. I wonder to myself if this is what I looked like last night to my friends after Paul came to me. If I was I’m embarrassed I looked this insane. I see the others looking at Jo concerned except Alex who grins slightly. To keep her from being sent to psych I explain.

“Laughter relieves tension.” I hope they can hear me over Jo who’s still laughing like a hyena, “People laugh at funerals all the time, it’s okay she’s okay.”

Jo starts to calm down, “Oh my god. I’m so sorry.” She stops for a second to laugh before composing herself, “I’m so sorry. Crap. I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry.” Jo finally stops laughing and now she’s sobbing cradling Alex’s face who looks at her with love.

I feel bad for Jo’s predicament and try to remedy it, “You don’t have to do this if you don’t want to.”

“She’s right.” Grey chimes in, “You have power of attorney you can hand the decision off the someone else.”

Jo sniffles and fully composes herself before responding, “Thank you both…but this is my decision and I intend to make it.” I suddenly get an alert on my phone and look to see a text message from Webber saying, ‘Meet me in my office.’

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After the ICU I gave an excuse that the office needed more information for my keycard. They buy it except for Jo who looks at me in pity and I shook my head to keep her quiet. Now I’m sitting in a chair across from Dr. Webber waiting to hear what this is about. I already know what this is about so I remind myself that I have nothing to be ashamed of.

If they want to fire me for my past then I’ll go on a rant and tell them I am not that angry teenager anymore. I am a surgical intern who has experienced pain that doesn’t make me crazy it makes me more able to connect with the next foster kid who got beat up by their guardian. Or a wife from a lowly neighborhood who can’t afford good healthcare. Or a teenage girl who has to pay for rent and take care of her family.

I am not gonna be ashamed of my past anymore. I think I came to this conclusion when I heard Jo and Jenny talking. Those two went through the ringer and instead of being beaten down they grew stronger and showed Paul that he didn’t break them. I went through hell but it didn’t break me, it made me stronger and I am not gonna let these guys judge me anymore.

Webber clears his throat, “Karev, I called you in here because-”

His words are cut short as his door bursts open and Dahlia comes in looking peeved. Behind her, Parker, Helm and Schmitt follow all standing by Webber’s desk like a small, baby blue army. I look at them surprised that they barged into our residency director’s office after spending the last month kissing up to him.

Webber looks at them stunned as well, “Dr. Qadri, Parker, Helm and Schmitt to what do I owe the pleasure?”

“You can’t do this.” Qadri starts, “You can’t fire someone for having a few scars and yes a few tiny arrests in her record before she was a C cup.” I widen my eyes at her and Parker steps in.

“It’s unlawful, and unjust and frankly sir it’s a bitch move to pull off this century when every little workplace incident is reported.”

“I can already see the headlines now.” Helm speaks next, “’Top Hospital Fire’s Surgeon for being Low Class.’ And that’s a nice one.”

“I-I don’t really want to say something to get me fired.” Schmitt stammers nervously and I roll my eyes at him, “But sir with all due respect she does not deserve to be fired for something out of her control…respectfully.”

“All right people I appreciate your input and this united front is something I hope for with my classes but-”

“If you fire her then I quit.” Qadri throws in and I look at her shocked.

“Are you stupid right now?” I ask her, “Don’t quit just because unlike you I have a problematic past.”

“A past you’ve worked hard to overcome.” Parker states, “And now you’re here in spite of all the obstacles and your superiors shouldn’t be another one. If that’s the kind of workplace I signed up for…then I’ll quit too.” I see Parker nudging Schmitt with his elbow and he gets the message.

“Um I’ll quit if you fire her.” I look at Helm to see her reaction and she doesn’t relent until Dahlia glares at her causing Helm to roll her eyes.

“Fine I’ll quit too.” Helm says without feeling.

“Damn it you guys we’re not doing Spartacus.” I say frustrated that they cut me from making my case to Webber, “I don’t need people from Mensa to defend me and quite frankly I don’t think the hospital will lose much from four interns quitting. I mean let’s face it my money was on Blood Bank getting kicked out the end of the year.”

Schmitt looks at me offended, “I was gonna lose my job for you!”

“Nobody is losing their jobs!” Webber yells out, “I called Dr. Karev in here to tell her that her job is safe and she is not fired.” I look at Webber in shock and I am silent for a moment before speaking.

“…What?”

“You’re not getting fired Karev.” Webber repeats, “Now listen Jennings pulled that meeting and told all of us to call you in so we can get an explanation for how this file came to our desk. After you explained that it was an attempt of harassment by Dr. Stadler after he cornered you yesterday, we decided to investigate further and see if the allegations were true. When we heard from the ICU nurses how he verbally assaulted his fiancé and moved to attack her it was clear there was nothing left to investigate.”

I exhale in relief at my good fortune for once, “So you all decided then to let me continue here?”

Webber winces, “Jennings was still insistent on letting you go and was gonna peer review it with the medical board.” My joy deflates, “But Dr. Avery went to the bat for you.” I look at him confused at Avery standing up for me and he explains, “He told Jennings that if he got the medical board to contact you, he would hire you the most bloodthirsty attorney out of his own pocket and make it so Jennings would lose his job and more.”

I widen my eyes at a plastic surgeon I’ve barely interacted with suddenly fighting for me to keep my job, “He really said that?”

“Word for word.” He turns to the interns who look relieved for me as well, “As for all of you there will be no need to quit in solidarity. I commend you for it though, not a lot of interns bond to the point of standing up to their residency director for a friend. It’s inspiring, loyalty is something I respect very much. It’s something people like Jennings could learn to adapt.”

“…So can I go then?” I ask him.

“Yes you may go.” I stand up and exit the room with the others and we all stand there frozen not knowing what to say. I clear my throat, “Thanks.”

Dahlia nods and the others grin appreciatively after that we go our separate ways.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After my first bit of good news today I stand next to Alex outside of Paul’s room while Jo and Jenny are inside no doubt wondering Jo’s next move as Paul’s power of attorney. We stand by each other tensely letting it sink in that this nightmare of ours is finally over.

Alex exhales, “I’m sorry.” I look at Alex confused by his apology and turns to me with guilty eyes, “I heard what you said in the lockers this morning.”

It takes a moment for me to remember one moment after this grueling day and simply say with a blank face, “Oh, you heard that.”

“Yeah I did. Look I’m not sorry for falling in love with Jo but I am sorry I made you feel like I ruined your life again.” I can tell that he’s being genuine, “Believe me if I had the chance again I would have killed him back at that damn conference I tracked him to.”

I inhale and exhale before responding, “If you did that he would win and Jo would be as scared of you as she was of him. I was angry and pissed off when I said that and I just wanted to lash out at the world instead of the one person responsible for it. But if I lashed out at him I wouldn’t be better than him either.” I sigh at that bitter truth, “I’ll tell you this though at least one of us got a good punch in before the lights went out.”

“Damn straight.” Alex agrees, “Listen I want to say thanks for standing by Jo when she confronted Paul so…thanks. I’m glad you were there if I couldn’t be.”

I look at Alex appreciatively, “Your welcome.” I decide to add one more thing, “She is way too good for you.”

Alex snickers quietly, “I’m glad I got your approval. And as of yesterday, DeLuca’s got mine.” I turn to him with shocked eyes. I don’t need my brother’s approval of who I date but oddly it makes me feel warm inside to know that he does.

“Thanks. I’ll pass the message on to him.”

“Not just yet.” I look at him curious and he grins, “Let him fear your big brother a little while longer.” I smack his arm even as he grins at his own joke. Meredith approaches us with a grin.

“It was a drunk driver.” We turn to her in shock over this news.

“What?!” Alex asks happily.

“They found the guy who hit Paul.” Meredith explains, “It was a drunk driver. So nobody has to go to Canada. She’s free.”

I exhale in relief for all of us not going to jail, “Thank god, I hate the cold and the Canadians are annoying as hell.” Alex chuckles lightly as Meredith leaves us to bask in our collected joy.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After Jo decided to donate Paul’s organs, I saw that as my cue to leave them to it and head to Joe’s with my friends. I owed them a drink for standing up for me earlier even though I acted like I didn’t need it. It was still nice and they’ve been good to me throughout this whole ordeal so it was the least I could do.

The bartender lines the shots for me, Taryn, Levi and Casey at the round table. Dahlia is with us but she can’t drink so I opt to buy her a coke instead. We grab our shots and they pause the drinks in midair to which I look at them confused.

“Don’t you want to make a toast?” Casey asks.

“No I don’t want to make a toast I want to drink.” They look at me annoyingly and I relent, “Fine here’s to the interns that were willing to quit for their friend even though she wouldn’t have done what they did.”

“Your horrible.” Helm tells me amused.

“I’m kidding.” I rectify, “I appreciate what you guys did it was ballsy, a little reckless but I don’t exactly have a high ground on that so cheers!” We clink out shots and swallow them down our throats. Helm and Schmitt groan and hiss at the burn causing me and Casey to look at them amused, “Wimps.”

Casey joins in, “Yeah can’t you guys handle your tequila?”

“Maybe if She-Karev didn’t spring for the cheap stuff I could.” Helm says.

“I said I was buying you a drink I didn’t say it was high quality.” I signal the bartender who looks to refill our shots but I speak out, “Oh no, not them just me my tab ended.”

“Figures.” Casey says knowingly, “I guess quantity is limited too.”

“Amber can I say something?” Schmitt asks me and I nod, “I think your totally amazing.”

I look at him surprised by his flattery and feel the need to point out, “Schmitt. I have a boyfriend and even if I didn’t I’m sorry but you’re not my type.”

“Ouch.” Casey whispers.

“I didn’t mean it like that.” Levi glares at Casey and turns to me, “I just mean…I-I look at your in the pit and the locker room and I used to think you had this most perfect life. In a million years I never would thought you had one single problem.”

I nod bitterly, “Well obviously I do.” Dahlia squeezes my hand in comfort as Schmitt continues.

“I know…and that’s why I think you’re the strongest person I’ve ever met.” I look at Schmitt appreciative of his compliment. I look back at my shot glass in thought.

“No one’s ever really said that to me before.” I admit softly, “I mean being the freak with the psycho for a mom leaves you with the lifelong impression that your broken. And the teasing and bullying didn’t help either.” They look at my sympathetically which I also point out, “And the occasional pity stares weren’t a favorite of mine either.” They all stop staring.

Dahlia speaks, “Well hey I think it’s safe to say you showed all of them after getting an MD.”

I nod proudly, “Yeah I did, didn’t I?” I swig my beer and decide to change the subject, “Why do you think Avery stood up for me in there?”

Helm snorts, “I can think of one reason.”

“Is sex always the reason for you?” I ask her and she shrugs, “It doesn’t matter as long as it got me to keep my job. Just as long as he’s not expecting a special favor in return.”

Dahlia chuckles, “I think that would end with him worse off than Stadler.”

“You know that’s right.” I clink my beer with her glass and resume back to drinking with the others looking to end this horrible week.

[uniquejellyfishqueen]

The Boston Bruins fired their head coach Jim Montgomery on 11/19 after their 3rd straight loss. (3 again.)

Boston is the 3rd largest city in the North east after NYC and Philadelphia. It is the largest in New England.

Settled:1625

Incorporated: 9/7/1630 (date of the old style naming)

9/17/1630 (date of new style naming)

Incorporated as a city: 3/19/1822

53 zip codes

617 and 857 area codes.

Boston was home to several events that proved central to the revolution and subsequent Revolutionary War, including the Boston Massacre (1770), the Boston Tea Party (1773) “at tea time everybody agrees.” , Paul Revere's Midnight Ride (1775) “Midnights.” , the Battle of Bunker Hill (1775), and the Siege of Boston (1775–1776)

Fenway Park - Red Sox

Broke ground: 9/25/1911

Opened: 4/20/1912

Gillette Stadium owned by the Kraft Group who owns the New England Patriots… Tom Brady who’s ex wife Gisele was a VS Angel from 1999-2006

Broke ground: 3/24/2000

Opened: 5/11/2002

7/1/2023 Ed Sheeran holds the record attendance with 71,723

7+1=8 7+2+3=12

8/12 12/8

“Boston” is track 6 on Kenny Chesney’s 9th studio album Be As You Are which was released on 1/25/2005. Track 9 on this album is “Key Lime Pie” -> “she stole his dog and dyed it key lime green” LGAD (that can also spell Glad…Me!?)

(69 makes the cancer symbol.)

Taylor Swift was supposed to join Kenny on his 2007 Flip Flop Summer Tour (58 shows, and it was between that one or his Poets and Pirates Tour. (Poet…. A tortured poet and a pirate.) the boat references make so much sense now.

*due to the sponsorship from Corona TS was not allowed to tour with him because she was 17..

Betty: “I’m only seventeen, I don’t know anything but I know I miss you”

Nothing New: “the kind of radiance you only have at seventeen. She’ll know the way and then she’ll say she got the map from me.”

I Think He Knows: “I am an architect, I’m drawing up the plans. It’s like I’m 17, nobody understands.’

Starlight: “We were 17 and crazy, running wild, wild can’t remember what song it was playing” -> Hits Different “each bar plays our song, nothing has ever felt so wrong”

There was some sort of legal, contractual thing where people weren't comfortable with having an alcohol-sponsored show and having a 17 or 18-year-old on the show," Chesney recalled during a radio interview in 2011. "So, I had to call Taylor and tell her that she couldn't do that tour. And I gave her, as a 'I'm sorry' present, I gave her a lot of money."

At the time, Swift was still in the early stages of her career; she hoped the tour would be her big break. She told Time she was "devastated" when she couldn't open for Chesney's tour.

However, she also said his generous gift changed her life.

"It was for more money than I'd ever seen in my life," Swift told Time. "I was able to pay my band bonuses. I was able to pay for my tour buses. I was able to fuel my dreams."

*old blue chair… the chair from Vigilante Shit..

KC =

Kansas City

Kenny Chesney, born in Knoxville, TN. Went to Gibbs HS. ->Morgan Wallen also from Knoxville, TN. Also went to Gibbs HS. -> brief encounter “wink wink” with Megan Moroney who joined Kenny Chesney on tour this past summer. ->bring it back to Morgan Wallen who has a collaboration with Post Malone “I Had Some Help”-> Post Malone is on “Fortnight” with TS. ->Post Malone is also going to be singing with Chris Stapleton at the CMA awards on 11/20/24. -> Taylor Swift ft Chris Stapleton “I Bet You Think About Me” -> Kenny Chesney released “Born” his 20th studio album on 3/22/2024 track #5 is titled “Thinkin’ Bout” oh and track #6 is “Guilty Pleasure”

The Most Worshipful Grand Lodge of Ancient Free and Accepted Masons of the Commonwealth of Massachusetts, commonly referred to as the Grand Lodge of Massachusetts and abbreviated GLMA, is the main governing body of Freemasonry within Massachusetts, and maintains Lodges in other jurisdictions overseas, namely Panama, Chile, the People's Republic of China (meeting in Tokyo, Japan), and Guantanamo Bay Naval Base, Cuba.

Founded in 1733, it is the fourth oldest Masonic Grand Lodge in existence, after the United Grand Lodge of England (1717), the Grand Lodge of Ireland (1725), and the Grand Lodge of Pennsylvania (1731).

**the Boston Masonic Temple was next to Weber Pianos according to a very old photo.

MASSACHUSETTS TS Tour History

1 x TD Garden in Boston

13 x Foxborough

TS Fearless Tour:

7/31/2009 Boston TD Garden (secret gardens in my mind)

6/5/2010 Foxborough “Jump Then Fall”

Speak Now Tour: Foxborough

6/25/2011

6/26/2011

Red Tour: Foxborough

7/26/2013 SSN as the surprise song

7/27/2013 Fearless as the surprise song - also Carly Simon as a special guest for “You’re so Vain”

1989 World Tour: Foxborough

7/24/2015 “You Belong With Me”

7/25/2015 “Fifteen”

Rep Tour Gillette Stadium:

7/26/2018 “22” and joined by Hayley Kiyoko for “Curious” -“curious minds”-Wonderland

7/27/2018 “Change”

7/28/2018 “Ours”

TS ET Foxborough, Massachusetts

#23 5/19/23

Taylor Swift (9) SSN …(social security number)

Red (22) Better Man (FTV)

#24 5/20/23 “rainiest show that ever show-ed” “like performing in the shower

Midnights (7) Question..? The … leads into …Ready For It?

Taylor Swift (13) Invisible “blind for love”

#25 5/21/23 “haunted piano” switched to guitar.

Lover (6) I Think He Knows

Red (2) Red

Kenny Chesney on the speak now tour in Nashville they sang big star

Speak Now Tour @ Bridgestone Arena (like bridges….)

9/16/2011 During her concert at the Bridgestone Arena on September 16, Swift was joined by Ronnie Dunn and the two performed "Bleed Red". She was also joined by Hayley Williams and the two performed "That's What You Get"

9/17/2011 Kenny Chesney joined her to sing “Big Star.” She was also joined by Andy Grammer for “Keep Your Head Up”. The encore was also “Just to See You Smile” with Tim McGraw.

Taylor swift on the Big Revival Tour 2015 (she is wearing a gray and white two piece that is very similar to the 1989 combos.) “dark gray all alone” this night was also Kenny chesneys 47th birthday they sang big star

3/26/2015 @ Bridgestone Arena. Kenny Chesney was joined by Jake Owen and Chase Rice.

“Big Star” was performed with TS and was #10 on the set. #22 was Dust on the Bottle a cover of David Lee Murphy I presume -> track #2 “Just to Say We Did” on his 20th album and most recent, Born, had David Lee Murphy as one of the 4 writers on the song.

*Kenny Chesney is one of the people TS thanked in her Time Person of the Year article. “I was blown away to see quotes from people I adore and admire like Stevie Nicks, Greta Gerwig, Shonda Rhimes, Phoebe Bridgers, Natalie Maines, Kenny Chesney, and Lucian Grainge”

Kenny Chesney responded (Chesney pronounced like chess)

Taylor, I knew looking in your eyes that first time on stage with us, you had 'it.' The hunger, that something special… A gift not everyone has to connect," he wrote. "It's been awesome watching you shine!"

"I'm glad TIME sees what I've always loved about your music, your art & you as a human being," he added. "I'm so proud of you & I love you."

***a piece of the puzzle of LOVER FEST that is CA and MA

Lover Fest East and West were supposed to happen on the following dates:

West: LA, Sofi Stadium 7/25/19 and 7/26/19 (22 shows in LA in TS history)

East: Foxborough, Gillette Stadium 7/31/19 and 8/1/19 (11 shows in MA in TS History)

11/22/1995 Toy Story is released by Pixar Animation Studios as the first feature film created completely from using computer generated imagery.

11/22/2020 TS wins Artist of the Year at the AMAs for the 3rd year in a row.

11/22/1986 Wayne Gretzky of the Edmonton Oiler’s becomes the 13th NHLer to score 500 goals

*TS has a history of performing on 3 of the 4 dates mentioned above in Massachusetts on those exact dates.

*No LA dates in her history match the days of Lover Fest

LA: 22 shows is TS history

*IDK about you but something 22 is going on

REP TOUR HAD NO LA STOP…? She was in Pasadena @ The Rose Bowl and Santa Clara @ Levi’s

Fearless Tour: 3 shows

5/22/2009 Staples Center John Mayer was a special guest at the May 22 STAPLES Center show. The two performed "Your Body Is a Wonderland" and "White Horse".

4/15/2010 Staples Center. Swift performed "Hot N Cold" with Katy Perry after "Today Was A Fairytale" at the Los Angeles show on April 15, 2010.

4/16/2010 Staples Center

Speak Now Tour Staples Center: 4 shows

8/23/2011 joined onstage by Justin Bieber to perform "Baby".

8/24/2011 joined by Jason Mraz to perform his hit, "I'm Yours". She also performed, "God Only Knows" by The Beach Boys.

8/27/2011 Swift performing, "Tonight Tonight" with Hot Chelle Rae

8/28/2011 she performed "Super Bass" with Nicki Minaj.

Red Tour Staples Center: 4 shows

****4 nights but only 3 nights had special guests.

****During her stops in LA on the ET is when there was filming for the movie for 3 nights

8/19/2013 “Ours” and "Want U Back" with Cher Lloyd and "Brave" with Sara Bareilles

8/20/2013 “Fifteen” and “Closer" with Tegan and Sara

8/23/2013 “Enchanted” and "Jenny from the Block" with Jennifer Lopez

8/24/2013 “Fifteen”

1989 World Tour Staples Center: 5 shows

8/21/2015 “All Too Well” acoustic tour debut. “Counting Stars” with Ryan Tedder. During “Style” Kobe Bryant presents TS with the Most Sold Out Performance Banner at Staples Center

8/22/2015 “You Belong With Me” “White Horse” with Uzo Aduba. “Doubt” and “Family Affair” with Mary J Blige.

8/24/2015 “Fifteen” “Goodbye Earl” with Natalie Maines. “You Oughta Know” with Alanis Morissette

8/25/2015 “Dreams” with Beck and “All of Me” with John Legend

8/26/2015 “Mean” “Good For You” with Selena Gomez. “Smelly Cat” with Lisa Kudrow. “Mirrors” with Justin TImberlake

Eras Tour Sofi Stadium: 6 shows (no thank you post)

8/3/2023 Filming for Concert Film

“I Can See You”

“Maroon”

8/4/2023 Filming for Concert Film

“Our Song”

“You Are In Love”

8/5/2023 Filming for Concert Film

“Death By a Thousand Cuts”

“You’re On Your Own Kid”

8/7/2023

“Dress”

“Exile”

8/8/2023

“I Know Places”

“King of My Heart”

8/9/2023 Announcement of 1989 TV

“New Romantics”

“New Years Day”

**Sofi = Sofia (play on words for sofa? Because there is one in the attic of the lover house… she also sings about a couch in some of her lyrics.)

- - but I also think of “Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus” -> in her hidden messages on previous albums: Taylor Swift track #9 “Should’ve Said No” hidden message was “Sam, Sam, Sam, Sam, Sam, Sam” (6x)

*Ts was supposed to be the first performing artist to open an NFL stadium and she has a vagina, so I see how that could be problematic for you… you’re white supremacy is showing America, and it’s gross.

Could be nothing or could be something:

The New England Patriots will host the LA Chargers on 12/29 (3 days before NYD 2 days before NYE) the time is TBD -> upon further review the Chiefs do no have a game that day… but the Bengals host the Broncos (a white horse) on 12/29 and the time is TBD. There are no NFL games on NYE but there are 2 on Christmas Day. The Ravens play the Texans at 4:30 and Beyoncé is doing the halftime show….. she was also TS plus one for the Eras Tour Concert Film Premiere on 10/11/23 at The Grove (same place as the Spotify TTPD pop up..)

12/29 is National Chocolate day “You ate 7 bars of chocolate”… “The Tortured Poets Department”… 7 as in Lover?

12/29/1607 - Pocahontas, daughter of Powhatan leader Wahunsenacawh, successfully pleads for the life of John Smith after tribal leaders attempt to execute him

12/29/1778 - Savannah, George is captured by three thousand British soldiers during the American Revolutionary War

12/29/1812 - Violin Sonata No. 10 in G major by Ludwig van Beethoven is performed for the first time

12/29/1845 - The United States annexes the Republic of Texas

12/29/1880 - The opera La Mascotte opens in Paris

12/29/1890 - On the Pine Ridge Indian Reservation, 300 Lakota are killed by the U.S. 7th Cavalry Regiment

12/29/1913 - Hollywood's first feature film, The Squaw Man by Cecil B. DeMille starts filming

12/29/1937 - With the adoption of a new Constitution, the Irish Free State is replaced by a new state called Ireland

12/29/1940 - During World War II, the Luftwaffe fire-bombs London, England, killing almost 200 civilians

12/29/1962 - British driver Graham Hill comes in first place in the South African Grand Prix at Prince George Circuit

12/29/1965 - CBS purchases the NFL TV rights for 1966-68 for $18.8 million per year

12/29/1973 - Time in a Bottle by Jim Croce hits #1 in the U.S. three months after he was killed in a plane crash

12/29/1975 - A bomb explodes at LaGuardia Airport in New York City, killing 11, and injuring more than 75 people

12/29/2007 - Tom Brady sets an NFL record, throwing his 50th touchdown pass, and the New England Patriots become the first team in NFL history to have a 16-0 score during the regular season

[faghubby]

"You where flirting pretty had with that guy at the bar." I teased Kelly.

"I wasn't" shs shot back but blushed. She had one too many as I led her back to out room. We had taken a long weekend for our ten year anniversary. With the kids we couldn't go away longer. So a short trip. Two hours from home a little bed and breakfast to the mountains as the leaves changed. We were both hoping to break from our routine bring romance back into the bedroom.

"Besides Paul you didn't try and stop me" Kelly retorted

"So you where flirting" I said

"Well he was very handsome" she kissed me as I unlocked the door.

"Should I go back down stairs and invite him up" I teased.

"Well if your not going to get the job done maybe you should" she laid on the bed dress pulled up and legs spread. I pulled off her panties and kissed my way up her leg to her already very wet pussy. I lapped up her juices. She played with my hair as I teased her clit. Making her cum on my tongue. She rolled me over and took off my pants and underwear in one jerk. She climbed on top of me teasing my cock with her slick hole.

"Maybe your new friend could help you fuck me one in each hole" she said biting my ear. She grabbed lube and greased my dick and worked it into her ass. As she fingered herself.

"Your little one for my ass, and his big one can fuck me right" she called out. She never talked like this and had never called me small. It all turned me on so much I came in her ass quickly. She rolled off still masterbating so I went down on her again.

"OH yes. Use your fingers" she moaned and soon I working four fingers in and out of her as I kissed and sucked her clit. She came hard grinding into my face. Then she collapsed. I got up to use the bathroom and she was asleep when I got back.

"Last night was nice" I said on our way to breakfast. The man from the bar. Charlie was there.

"Did you sleep well" Kelly asked sitting at a table with him.

"Yes, always do when I come up here" he told her. The two of them started off right where they had ended last night. Flirting. I just sat back and watched. It turned me on seeing this man flirting with my wife. Charlie had an appointment and said his goodbyes. Only then did Kelly attention return to me. She was very playful and giggles. After breakfast we went to the room to grab a sweater. But as soon as the door closed Kelly was all over me. We were naked in seconds and back in bed. No foreplay I just mounted her. She was again so wet.

"Charlie turns you on" I teased.

"Shut up" she said

"He does doesn't he" I teased

"What? Alright yes he does, feel better now" thinking it had spoiled the mood. But instead I thought it so hot. Again I came quickly. She made a pouting face.

"Sorry, how about I make it up to you" I said.

"How?" She asked knowing I would not get hard again for hours.

"What if I said you could have charlie?" I said

"You don't mean that, besides I could never cheat on you" she said kissing me.

"No, a free pass. You can fuck Charlie no guilt" I told her.

"Paul this has gone to far" she said getting out of bed.

"I am serious" I told her. "The two of you flirting is so hot" I confessed. I let it go and went walking in the woods. It was almost time for lunch. When Kelly bought Charlie back up.

"Where you serious about Charlie?" She asked

"YES, very much so" I told her. Her hand slid inside my pants my and found my hard dick. She pulled my pants down and right there pinned against a tree she started to jerk ,e off.

"I won't let you have another woman" she told me

"I know it's OK. I think you would like Charlie. And it is kinda hot" I told her. Someone was coming I quickly zipped up my pants. As they passed. A smile crossed her face.

"OK we will talk to him together tonight. And that doesn't get any more attention till after" she informed me. But then proceeded to tease me for the rest of the day. Bending over in front of me. Or flashing me a boob. She must of asked a dozen times if we where really going to do this.

We saw Charlie again after we got back from dinner. Kelly had me go ask.

"Charlie" I said sitting down at the bar next to him.

"I have a strange offer" I started. "Kelly is a very attractive woman" I said.

"Paul let me stop you" Charlie said. "I would love to fuck Kelly" he whispered. With my shock reaction. "This your first time?' He smiled and bought me a drink. Kelly sat down on the otherside of him.

"Are we going to let him watch?" He asked Kelly she didn't respond just left me sitting at the bar. Two minutes later I got a text. A pic of Kelly in just a pair of panties. /room 4 you have 3 minutes to change your mind/ I sat and ordered another. Wondering what they where doing but was rock hard. Then I headed to our room. It was two hours before Kelly returned she was a mess. She came in and jumped on the bed next to me.

"Thank you" she said rubbing my leg. Ieaned to kiss her.

"Wait" she said but I kissed her anyway.

"I should shower and brush my teeth" she informed me. She got up. And went to get cleaned up she came out naked a few minutes later.

"Tell me everything" I told her.

"Really" she looked surprised. Then shrugged

"I sucked his cock. She told me taking off my pants.

"Is he big" I asked

"Bigger" she replied. Holding mine in her hand. She slowly stroked it after sucking on the head.

"Did he make you cum?" I asked.

"Several times" once doggie style and again as I rode cowgirl. Then again when he fucked my ass." She told me. He was hard the whole time. That was all it took I burst in her hand.

As she cleaned her hand.

"You can fick him again tomarrow before we go" I told her she kissed me and we cuddled and watched the end of a movie together.

"Maybe next year" she whispered in my ear.

[recallthename]

Hey, hello! I'm sorry if you've answered this question to others before, but in case you read fanfiction, can you recommend me some? I was reading until recently ''Carry That Weight'' by waveofahand (and then its continuation ''Hello, Goodbye''), and it was long and exciting but I reached its last written chapter and I'm sad. I decided to ask you, because you like Paul, me too, and maybe you'd know some good Paul focused (though they don't have to be entirely) or at least Paul-respecting fics. They can be Mclennon of course. I love them angsty... but I'd be curious to check any recs.

i do read fic! i'm pretty picky about it though, so i don't feel like i have that much. but i'm always happy to rec!  especially cause it seems like we have similar tastes.

first off, there are two wips i'm reading that i am deeply into. which is saying something since i normally stridently avoid wips.  these do both still have chapters regularly coming out, so i feel confident reccing them (which i wouldn’t if they seem abandoned)

Going Nowhere by inspiteallthedanger - When Paul gets the news, he rushes out to New York and ends up bringing an injured John back to England. Once there, they try and figure out how to find their way back to one another. A post-1980 fix-it that includes flashbacks to some major moments in their past and an exploration of where John and Paul might have ended up if John had lived.

(It's Just) Another Day by obstinatrix - Cavendish, 1974; The stars, it seems, have aligned: the rare weekend has arisen upon which both Ringo and the McCartneys will be in London at the same time. This is lucky, because Paul has something to tell Ringo — something nobody’s sure how John would react to if he were ever to find out. Or: they’re lesbians, Harold. Eventual John/Paul with lots of other stuff along the way.

the rest are all completed fics.  i also tried to only include longer ones.  partially because they’re my preference and partially cause i’m more likely to remember them well lol.  maybe some day i’ll make a proper Long Post with every bookmark i have on ao3.

The Wild And Windy Night by tikk - 26k words - After the Beatles split, John and Paul's relationship deteriorates hard and fast. John grows more and more reckless, and Paul doesn't know how to reach him. Until suddenly Paul is broken apart, just as John starts to pull himself together.  if you read nothing else i rec, read this one.  probably my favorite in the fandom, i still think about it all the time even though it was one of the first i read.

Throw The Wine by savageandwise - 51k words - "But you realise that you're in real life, and you don't split up a beautiful thing with a beautiful thing." -Paul McCartney Or do you?

i was a younger man then (now) (post hoc) by fingersfallingupwards - 27k words - John’s twelve when a bloke appears from a flaming pie and says, “From this day forward you are Beatles with an ‘a.’” The bloke is Paul. Or: paul and john meet at all ages and eras and john is the time-traveler’s wife the way only john lennon can be

metered by fingersfallingupwards - 44k words - "The bloke said something just the same as you did, about floating off unless tied down, or maybe it was the other way around, getting tied down to float off, y'know.”- OR: Canon-era John and Paul haphazardly invent BDSM, and learn a few things about power, surrender, pleasure, and themselves along the way

You're a Dream Lover by thisbirdhadflown - 44k words - "John had once mused that reality leaves a lot to the imagination. Christ, don’t they know it. But what you don’t dare do in real life and what you don’t dare imagine leaves what you dream. It’s the closest thing to truth he’s ever had. And then there’s John, reigning above everything. Emperor of Eternity." Paul and John start sharing lucid dreams together in the summer of 1967.

We'll Always Have Paris by bunnoculars - 22k words - John and Paul go to Paris. Part 1 is set during their trip over John's birthday in 1961, and Part 2 is set during their residency at Olympia Theatre in 1964. The last part would've been set during their impromptu visit in 1966, but I have no plans to write it.

if you’re a paul fan and not a strident mclennon, i recommend checking out what (unfortunately little) there is of paul/omc on ao3.  there are a few great ones with robert fraser, downtothelastdrop seems determined to hook him up with everyone and i’m obsessed with it.  also i’m not 100% if my privacy is open (i think so?) but here’s my ao3 bookmarks, which has all of the shorter/incomplete wips i’ve loved that i neglected to list here.  again i will probably actually make a rec list on tumblr eventually, but just for in the mean time.

hope you find some stuff you like!

[missymurphy1985]

Friends with Added Benefits (part 3)

Warning - Smut / breeding kink / angst

Taglist @queenshelby @margoo0 @being-worthy @peakyscillian @ntmynouis @janelongxox @elenavampire21 @noctvrnalmoth @ysmmsy @cloudofdisney @lauren-raines-x @namelesslosers @misscarolineshelby @screemqueen

A week on from your positive pregnancy test, your scene was ready, you just needed to get into costume. Maddy, your PA was there to help, the dress along with the substantial bump you needed to wear under it was quite the task on your own.

"So any morning sickness?" She asked, strapping the belly onto you.

"None at all as long as I stay away from tea. And shepherds pie.. that stuff is foul when it comes back up..." You laughed.

"I have to ask... Who's the lucky man?? I thought you'd be single forever!"

"Just a one night stand, he's well out the picture now. Doesn't want to be involved." You weren't completely dishonest.. although the actual father had barely spoken to you since the news came out - in fact he'd done everything in his power to avoid you, other than your scenes together. One of which was coming up in the next ten minutes.

"You know, I always thought you and Cillian would end up together..." Maddy smirked.

"What? God no, I'm not interested in any kind of relationship, and he's just a good friend. That's all." You must've blushed harder than you thought based on Maddy's raised eyebrow.

"Y/n, we're ready for you!" The director called as Maddy straightened out your dress and you made your way out.

Walking onto the set - Tommy's office in Arrow House - you leaned on the large oak table as the director called Action.

The scene....

Tommy entered the room, surprised to find his wife leaning against the desk with her arms folded.

"Katherine I've told you how many times to stay out of here.."

"Why Tommy? Got something to hide?"

"Why would I hide anything from you?"

"You tell me, Thomas. I'm never allowed in here. Why? Is this where you bring your whores when I'm not around?"

"The deal was, not in our marital bed. You said nothing about my desk," he smirked.

"Am I not enough for you? Just a mare you can breed when you need an heir? Shame, this one's a girl Tommy - what'll you do then? Keep breeding me until you have your precious son? You've barely looked at me since I got pregnant, never mind touched me.." your eyes watered. Scripted, but it didn't take much effort. Your hands fell onto your belly. "She's been kicking for weeks now - you've shown zero interest."

"Kicking?"

"Yes Thomas. She hears your voice and she kicks - every time." His eyes fell down to your hands, and he bit his lip, slowly making his way over to you. Shakily, he reached a hand out, and you took it - moving to place it against the side. You could feel his hand shaking like a leaf. Silence.. his hand moving closer. He was almost pulling away from you, before it made contact.

"Feel it?" You tapped his chin to make him look up at you. His eyes were glassy, as he nodded.

"Yeah.. it's a girl?"

"Yes. Polly told me. Says she'll be a film star. Ruby Shelby." His eyes back on your belly now, another long silence. He'd turned almost white, even under the makeup you could see it.

"Sorry... I um.. what's the line?" He feigned a laugh with the rest of the crew, but you knew him better than that - Cillian Murphy never forgot his lines. "In fact, I'm not feeling too good, I'll um.. I'll be back in 10 okay, we'll pick up where we left off.." he glanced back at you, and left the set quickly, Paul following him to make sure he was okay.

He didn't come back - the director was pissed but you'd managed to calm him down with the promise you'd sort him out.

On your way off set later, Paul called your name from his trailer.

"Got a sec y/n?" You turned and walked over, he invited you inside.

"What's up?" You sat on the sofa.

"You know Cillian better than anyone on set y/n, see if you can get through to him yeah? He's walking round like a bloody zombie?"

"Where is he?"

"Back at the hotel I think, he shrugged me off when I tried to talk to him. Jumped in his car and took off. He won't answer my calls." You kissed his cheek and nodded, heading out to your car and back to your hotel, calling Cillian once your phone connected to the Bluetooth.

"Hey." He picked up, which surprised you.

"Hey, where are you?"

"My room."

"Are you okay?"

"Yep."

"We on one word answers now?"

"I'm fine, y/n, just felt a migraine coming on. I'm in bed. I'll be fine. See you tomorrow." He hung up, his phone turned off when you tried to call again. You headed back to your hotel feeling more confused than ever. You'd never known him to suffer with any kind of headache, never mind a migraine.

Walking towards your trailer, you caught his eye as he left his own. He smiled when he saw you and made his way over.

"Hey, I'm sorry about yesterday, just a bad day. How're you feeling?" He squeezed your elbow and you walked together towards your trailer.

"I'm good. Still can't stand the smell of tea though if you could keep that mug away from me please, I don't think you'd appreciate me hurling over your boots!" He chuckled and put his arm round your shoulders.

"It's coffee. Wouldn't do that to you." You smiled at the gesture, knowing he much preferred tea to coffee, and accepted his arm over you, wrapping your own round his waist. He wasn't normally so affectionate in public, but you welcomed it all the same.

"So, can I see you again soon?" You whispered, making sure no one could hear.

"Is it safe to.. you know.. with the.. um..."

"The baby, Cillian, you can say it. Yes it's perfectly safe."

"Okay.. my room tonight - after dinner?"

"It's a date Mr Murphy. I'll see you later." He smirked as you left his arms and walked to Maddy's trailer to get ready for your scene. Putting the whole thing down to the stress of him getting back into Tommy's shoes again, you smiled to yourself. Your Cillian was back to normal again, and you couldn't help the slight spring to your step.

[semisgroupie]

 The Woman Who Used to be Mrs. Jones

Genre: smut, fluff (kinda at the end?), angst

Pairing: Aoi Todo X F!Reader

Word Count: 6.4k words

Warnings (some of the content can be triggering so please read through the warnings before reading this): cheating (in this Todo is the other man/reader is in a loveless marriage where her husband cheats on her/her husband is just a huge asshole), toxic relationship, sexual scenes, unprotected sex (don’t be silly wrap your willy), oral sex (f! and m! receiving), dirty talk, multiple creampies, bathroom sex, praise, risky sex (they fuck at a party the reader and her husband is hosting), mention of a small altercation between Todo and reader’s husband, mention of a child & brief mention of pregnancy (not detailed),  if I missed anything let me know

A/N: I do not condone, support or encourage cheating! It is not good, don’t do it! The song Me and Mrs. Jones by Billy Paul helped me with creating this piece so I recommend listening to it while reading this. This has depicted sex within this so MINORS DNI (I’m not gonna cry bc I don’t cry but I am not afraid to beat some ass) So I hope you all enjoy it, comments/reblogs are very appreciated!!! I also apologize in advance if formatting is weird on mobile :/

Flashbacks are bolded & italicized! Also separated by a border!

Todo walks up to the counter of the cafe and orders the usual for the both of you. He came early since he was done with work earlier than usual so after paying for the drinks he carried them to the special spot you two shared. Once seated he takes his phone out to check the time while taking a sip from his drink.

The time read 5:45. You got out fifteen minutes ago and your job wasn’t too far from the cafe, so you’d be there soon. The bell chimed to the cafe and Todo looked up to see you walk in.

His heart pounded in his chest, you looked as beautiful as you did the first day he met you all those years ago in high school. Once you two made eye contact you flashed him a smile and made your way over to him.

“Hey baby, I didn’t think you’d be here before me.”

He felt his cheeks flush at the pet name. You leaned down to hug him and give him a kiss, placing your hands on each side of his face caressing him as your lips met. Once you pulled away you sat down and started talking about your day at work.

He couldn’t help but lose focus as to what you were saying. He knew your day was tough from how your hair looked a bit disheveled from running your hands through it, a habit you had picked up when you were extremely stressed.

Time passed as the two of you spoke about each other’s days and then you were both done with your drinks.

“Wanna go home now Aoi? As much as I love it here I found this new recipe online that I would really like to try out!”

He nodded as you both got up, tipped the cashier one last time before heading to your shared home. The distance was short from where you both were currently and when you two were together even one hundred miles would feel like two blocks.

As Todo put the key in to unlock the door he sighed in content. Once you both were inside he took your jacket off and put it away. He leaned on the kitchen island while you started taking out ingredients for dinner.

“This isn’t a dream right Y/N?”

It just felt so unrealistic to him he just had to be dreaming. Your laughter filled the air as you walked towards him. You wrapped your arms around his body and looked up at him.

“While we did this in the most unconventional way it is very much real” you removed your left hand from his body to put your hand close to his line of view, “this ring you gave me a few months ago is proof of our love and the ring I gave you on your left ring finger is also proof of my love and dedication to you.”

Unconventional? Was that even the right word to explain the events that led you both to where you are now?

You started your arrangement with him two years ago. You became “Mrs. Jones” a year before that. A happy marriage was wished to the both of you, but your marriage was anything but that. Six months after you both said your I do’s you found your husband in bed with his boss. They didn’t even think about trying to conceal their affair.

To say it broke your heart was an understatement. You felt like he ripped your heart out of your chest and destroyed it slowly as you watched. Soon there were lonely nights filled with you drinking and crying yourself to sleep. Soon after you just became numb, you got used to putting up a facade whenever your friends or family asked how married life was.

The only one who knew of the affair and how horrible your marriage actually was, was your best friend Valerie. When she first found out you had to hold her back the next time she saw him because she was just filled with rage. You were trying to find a good divorce attorney, but you just didn’t have enough money yet, so you were stuck for the time being. Then it was time to plan how to celebrate one year since the day you married him.

Valerie said that she would bring a special surprise for you, but you just pushed it to the side. You settled on hosting a party at your parent’s house since it was big enough. The fake smile you had plastered on your face burned your soul more than the cheap ring on your finger. A cheap ring that meant the entire world one moment but now means absolutely nothing.

You were leaning on the wall, holding a glass of champagne, next to your husband as Valerie approached you.

“Y/N! You look absolutely stunning!” she gave your husband a side glance as she begrudgingly said his name, “Declan... anyways I have your surprise so come with me to the backyard!”

Before you could say anything she grabbed your hand and weaved both of you through the crowd of people. She opened the door and you almost dropped your glass at the sight.

“Aoi? I thought you were away in Sweden?”

Todo brings a hand to his neck.

“I was but my job relocated here, and Valerie told me everything. As much as I’d love to say congratulations, I can’t.”

Your body moves on its own as you approach him and hug him. He holds you on instinct and all that is heard is sniffles. You move back and quickly apologize for your abrupt actions.

“Hey, don’t apologize pretty girl” he brought his hands to cup your face and wiped the tears from your face, “Declan should be the one apologizing, how could he take someone like you for granted. I know you might not believe me, but you look just as beautiful as you did when we were in high school.”

The two of you were high school sweethearts but got accepted into different colleges. The inevitable happened and you both broke up, heading your separate ways losing contact. The last thing you heard about him was he had a job in Sweden and that was it. After college you met Declan and he seemed like a knight in shining armor, but it was too late for you to realize he was the devil in disguise.

You leaned into his touch as if you two were the only ones there. Only if he was the one you married; you both would be so happy. You wouldn’t have to worry about any mistresses or affairs because even in this moment you felt all his love. Todo moved in and before you knew it you felt his lips on yours.

You melted into the kiss immediately kissing him back until he abruptly pulled away.

“I am so sorry Y/N. I didn’t mean to you’re still married, and this is the anniversary party and he’s inside—”

“I don’t care about Declan. The only one I care about is you. Valerie always says I should be a little selfish and now is the time. I still care about you Aoi, I still love you. The piece of my heart that left with you is now back and I’m whole again. I understand if you’re not comfortable with this, I am trying to find a lawyer and once I get the promotion at my job I can finally pay for one.”

You looked up at him hoping he would indulge you in one last kiss even if it would be the last one you two ever shared. You watched as a smile grew on his handsome face.

“I love you too Y/N, I always had and I always will. When Valerie told me about everything I cannot explain the anger I felt not only at him but also myself. If I never left then you wouldn’t be in this situation. Maybe you would’ve been with me.”

He leaned down and placed another kiss on your lips. Before it could continue Valerie ran out to the both of you.

“Hey lovebirds as much as I love seeing you two together Declan is starting a toast and wants his wife by his side.”

She rolled her eyes as your husband’s name left her lips. You took a deep breath and turned inside, Valerie and Todo following you. You took another deep breath as you made your way to your husband putting up the fake smile. He handed you a glass of champagne and started the toast.

“This past year with my beautiful wife by my side has been the best year of my life. Waking up next to her every morning is what fuels my fire. I love this woman so much and marrying her was the best decision of my life. Thank you all for coming and supporting us. Here’s to a happy, healthy marriage and for many more years to come!”

As glasses clinked and cheers filled the room you were filled with disgust at his words. How could he spew such garbage knowing it meant absolutely nothing?

“Come on honey, you can do a better job with that fake fucking smile. Make everyone believe that we’re in love and that I haven’t fucked almost every single one of my coworkers. Maybe I’ll even indulge in you tonight.”

“Fuck you Declan, you piece of shit.”

You excused yourself to the bathroom shoving your heel into his foot making him wince in pain. Todou followed you upstairs a few minutes afterwards hearing your sobs. He knocked on the door once, twice until your shaky voice responded.

“Hey it’s me, I wanted to check on you.”

He waited hearing your heels click on the ground until you reached the door to open it. You looked up at him with tear stained cheeks, eyes puffy from all the rubbing and wiping your tears away. Todo looked at you with so much love it was as if Eros struck him with his bow.

He quickly placed his lips on yours, the kiss feverish but also very loving. As if he was telling you how much he loved you each time his lips met yours. He picked you up and placed you on top of the bathroom sink, quickly running to shut and lock the bathroom door.

“Please let me make you forget about him. Please let me show you what it is like to make love and not fuck. Please Y/N.”

All you did was nod before placing your lips back on his allowing your hands to slide down and undo his belt. He allowed you to undo his belt and pants letting them hit the ground while he was lifting the skirt of your dress up.

“As much as I’d love to take my time worshipping your body we have to make this pretty quick beautiful. But please if you want to stop at any time stop me.”

You nodded at him as you felt his hand lightly graze your clothed pussy. He moved your panties to one side as he slipped a finger in, slowly moving it then inserting a second finger moving it just as slow but each movement made you moan and shiver. You started getting impatient and you grabbed his wrist.

“Please Aoi, please make love to me.”

He slotted his lips against yours again as he removed his cock from his boxers. Moving the tip against your folds making you both moan in the kiss. Once he entered you, slowly and gentle, you broke away from the kiss to throw your head back and moan. Once you gave him the okay he started thrusting.

“Fuck, you’re so tight baby. Just holding me like you don’t want me to let go.”

He moved faster hitting all the right spots. It was as if his cock was designed to fit inside your pussy. Both of your moans and groans filled the small bathroom. It quickly became heated as the mirror started to fog up. He started thrusting into you faster and harder making you throw your hands on the mirror for stabilization.

He placed sloppy kisses along the column of your neck. He lifted himself from your neck to lick two of his fingers and place them on your clit, moving them in small tight circles.

“Come on baby cum for me. Cum all over my cock and I will fill you up. I’ll make this pretty little pussy so fucking messy with my cum and you’ll walk around in that party filled with it. You look so fucking gorgeous baby. I love you so much.”

That sent you off the edge, creaming on his cock with a high pitched moan of his name. He continued pounding your pussy through your orgasm as he was nearing his own. You pulled him in for another kiss running your nails up and down his clothed chest. Feeling your nails against him made him reach his own peak, filling you completely with his cum.

Todo peppered kisses along your lips, swollen and puffy from kissing so intensely, as you both came down from your highs.

“I’m going to pull out now okay?”

“Okay that’s fine.”

You didn’t need to tell Todo to be gentle, he was already treating you like fine glass. He slowly pulled out and quickly moved your underwear to cover your cum filled pussy. A low chuckle left his lips.

“Don’t want you leaking cum all over the place.”

He lifted you off the bathroom sink after picking up both his pants and boxers. Before you could even smooth out your dress Todo did it for you, fixing any flyaways in your hair and placing one last kiss on your lips. He unlocked the door and helped lead you to the stairs.

“We should head down at separate times so we don’t look so suspicious.”

You nodded, placing one last kiss one his lips.

“I love you Aoi.”

“I love you too Y/N.”

You went downstairs and walked to your parents. You had a small limp and it filled both Aoi and yourself with joy seeing how your husband stared, completely confused at you. Valerie leaned next to you close to your ear.

“I already gave Aoi your phone number, go get that dick again.”

She lightly smacked your ass, a small yelp leaving your lips. The party went on for a couple more hours, lingering glances shared between you and Todo. When the party ended you had to figure out a ride situation since your husband drank way too much and you were a little tipsy.

Declan’s brother offered to take him back and before he could offer you a ride Todo came up and offered to take you home, to which you immediately agreed. The ride was filled with laughter and talk of memories. Also, when Todo parked at a secluded area near where you live you thanked him for the ride with a mind blowing blowjob.

He dropped you off in front of your place, being the gentleman he is, he walked you to the front door giving you one last kiss.

“I hope to see you again soon beautiful angel.”

“How about tomorrow? We could go get drinks or dinner.”

“There’s a cafe near my job, I’ll text you the address. Meet me there tomorrow when you’re done with work.”

You nodded as you fished your keys out of your purse. Taking a deep breath you unlocked the door and put your things away, heading straight to the guest bedroom because you refuse to sleep in the same bed Declan had all his whores in.

You thought he went to sleep until you heard a groan of your name. You rolled your eyes and continued going to the guest bedroom, ignoring him until you felt a hand grab your wrist.

“What do you want Declan?”

“What, I can’t touch my wife? You looked really sexy tonight so I thought I might do you the favor of fucking you.”

Fire burned in your veins. Every time you tried to pull yourself away from his hold, his grip got tighter.

“Declan, you’re drunk, and I hate you. Even if I was drunk I still wouldn’t go to bed with you, so make good friends with your hand or call one of your whores up because I will never sleep with you again.”

He turned you around.

“Listen here you bitch, you will never talk to me like that ever again. I did you the fucking favor of marrying your sorry ass now you treat me like this? I haven’t touched you in fucking months and this is what you tell me? Fuck you.”

“My sorry ass? Did me a favor? Did you also do me a favor by cheating on me over and over again? Did you do me a fucking favor then Declan? Rubbing it in my face that you didn’t love me the way I loved you, fucking anything that had tits and bringing them back here. I. Fucking. Hate. You. Rot. In. Hell. I don’t know what those girls see in you anyways, I had to fake almost all my orgasms and your dick has a weird curve, you should go see a doctor for that actually. I can’t wait until I have the money to divorce you and properly leave your sorry ass in the dust.”

You snatched your arm from his grip and locked yourself in the guest bedroom. You took off the heels and unzipped your dress letting it hit the ground as you made your way to the bathroom that was connected to the room. You took off the ring on your left hand flushing it down the toilet.

“That’ll be the last I see of you.”

You turned on the shower letting the water run, steam filling up the bathroom fogging up the mirror. You slipped your panties off the memory of your time with Aoi in the bathroom of your parents’ house filling your mind as you picked up the cum stained panties and put them in the laundry basket.

You entered the shower letting the water run over your body. After your shower you put your pajamas on and sent a goodnight text to Todo setting up the time for meeting at the cafe tomorrow. The next morning you woke up to an empty house, you let out a sigh of relief not wanting to deal with Declan after the stunt he pulled last night.

Your day at work went fairly quickly then it was the end of your workday. Inputting the address Todo gave you into the GPS you realized the drive was going to be pretty short. Once you found parking you walked into the cafe, the little bell on the door chiming with the movement. You looked around and saw Todo sitting at a corner side table, isolated from most of the crowd.

That’s when you started the arrangement. He was fine with being the sideman for now until he could properly have you to himself. Little dates and mind blowing sex filled your lives for the next four months.

~Four Months Later~

Todo was sitting at the table that basically became the unofficially assigned table for you both as he heard the chime to the door. His head shot up expecting you to come through the doorway. It was just an elderly couple. He checked his phone again, checking for any new messages from you and nothing. Just the last message that read: “I’ll see you soon my love”.

Today was the day you would find out if you got the promotion. With the promotion you would get a huge increase in your salary and a $2,000 advance once it was official. $2,000 was the amount you needed to finally afford the divorce lawyer.

Ten minutes passed and Todo ordered another drink for himself. To say he was nervous for you would be an understatement. He was fidgeting like crazy. He received the drink and sat back down at the table. The door chimed again and he looked up to finally see you.

You waved at him and gave him a small smile. Worry filled him and he was afraid to ask you how everything went.

“There’s no way she didn’t get the promotion. She has the best relationship with her boss and she works so hard.” He thought to himself.

You greeted him with a kiss on his head and sat down. He stood silent watching you.

“So I should tell you about what happened at work right Aoi?”

“You don’t have to honey, it’s fine.”

A smile graced your face, a genuine smile, the only type of smile that you shared with Todo since he filled you with genuine happiness.

“I got the promotion.”

Todo sat there in shock.

“What? What did you just say?”

“I got the promotion. I just came back from meeting the divorce lawyer to fill out necessary paperwork, that’s why I came so late.”

He got up from his seat and lifted you up into his arms.

“I’m so happy. I could yell from the rooftops.”

So he did the next best thing, he yelled about your promotion to the entire cafe. The people inside applauded you and gave you words of encouragement. The elderly man approached the both of you after Todo put you down.

“Congratulations to you young lady. This young man seems to be extremely proud of you. I didn’t mean to interrupt the celebration but it’s just that the both of you remind both my wife and I of us when we were younger. While we met under unconventional circumstances we have spent the past 30 years together. I wish you both a happy, healthy relationship.”

You both thanked the old man and watched him walk back to his wife.

“Do you think we’ll be like them one day Aoi?”

He pulled you close to him.

“I don’t think we will, I have a feeling I know we will. Now let’s go pick up your things and bring you back to my place to properly celebrate.”

He drove you to your house and walked with you inside to pack your clothes. In the midst of packing things you both heard the front door slam shut, meaning one thing: Declan was home.

“Care to explain the car in front Y/N? I know you don’t have enough money to afford a new one.”

You sighed and continued packing with Todo.

“I was asking you a fucking question -- oh who’s this? Why are you packing? Oh I get it now, finally got a new guy to deal with your shit? Good luck buddy--”

Before Declan could get another sentence out Todo walked over and shoved him against the wall.

“Don’t you ever speak to Y/N like that again asshole. For your information, she’s leaving you and coming with me. A guy who actually loves her.”

Declan stood there shocked that someone stood up to him. Once you zipped up your bag Todo left Declan to help you. Todo walked behind you with your bag in his hand. You turned one last time to Declan.

“Oh by the way I’ve been having sex with Aoi for the last four months and the first time was at the anniversary party. The reason I was limping was because of him not because of my heels. And you’ll be getting my divorce papers soon, go fuck yourself Declan.”

You walked with Todo to his car and he drove you back to the cafe so you could bring your car to his place. Once you entered through the front door he was on top of you. Placing sloppy kisses all over your lips and neck.

“You looked so fucking sexy there Y/N.”

He picked you up and brought you to his bedroom while you were peppering kisses along his neck. He put you on the bed and started stripping, you followed suit until you were left in your bra and panties and he was left in his boxers.

He pushed you down on the bed and crawled over you. Placing kisses down your body, removing your bra once he got to your chest and removing your panties once he got to your hips. Not one inch of your body was left untouched by his lips except your pussy. The place you needed him most.

“Aoi please.”

“Please what baby? Tell me what you want.”

“Need you—your mouth on my pussy please.”

He wasted no time. He licked from your leaking entrance to your engorged clit. Making you throw your head back.

“I don’t know how but you taste better every time. I’m fucking addicted to how you taste.”

He dove back in, wrapping his lips around your clit and using a finger to tease your entrance. He was alternating between light sucks and harsh sucks making you buck your hips against his mouth.

“Aoi please fuck me. Wanna cum on your cock please.”

He gave your clit one last suck and took the finger he used to circle your entrance and put it in your mouth. The feeling of your tongue swirling around his finger made him even harder if that was possible. He stood up and took off his boxers, throwing them to a random area in the room.

He spit on his hand and pumped himself a few times as he made his way back on the bed.

“Are you ready my love?”

You spoke breathlessly “yes Aoi, please.”

He aligned himself and entered you slowly, going inch by inch until he bottomed out inside you. A moan leaving both of your lips.

“And correction my love, I don’t fuck you” you furrowed your brows but that expression quickly changed when he pulled himself back until only the head of his cock was inside you and he bottomed out again in a swift movement, “I make love to you.”

He leaned down placing his forearms on either side of your head slotting his lips against yours. His thrusts slowly increase in speed. He breaks the kiss to praise you.

“My beautiful girl is so talented. You look so gorgeous right now. So fucking beautiful, I love you Y/N. I love you so much.”

“Aoi, feels s’good. Please I’m gonna cum soon. You fill me so good, like you were made for me.”

You wrap your legs around his waist and he slides his hand down between the two of you to rub circles around your clit. Your moans start increasing in pitch signaling that you’re going to cum. You bring your hands to his back and rake your nails down, digging into his skin, sure to leave marks. His ruts increased in speed bringing you to your orgasm.

“Fuck baby you’re clenching my cock so tight. I’m gonna cum so deep in your pussy baby. I’m gonna fill you up every single day because now you are mine.”

He emphasized each word with a hard thrust. He buries his face in the crook of your neck. Once he cums he sinks his teeth in trying to conceal the guttural moan that leaves his mouth. Coming down from his high he lifts his head up.

“I’m sorry baby I didn’t mean to—”

“There’s no need to apologize Aoi, I’m sorry about the scratches on your back.”

“Don’t apologize pretty girl, with how often we’re going to be making love I’ll get used to it.”

He slowly pulled out and you felt the cum leak out of you. He picked you up and carried you bridal style to the shower. Let’s just say both of you were lucky that the neighbors were gone for the night.

~1 year later~

The both of you have been together for a year and four months. Todo was by your side the entire time throughout the divorce preceding. Comforting you and supporting you the entire time. Once your divorce was finalized your relationship received an official title.

Both of you were extremely happy but there was the voice in the back of Todo’s head that gave him doubts. When he went to go engagement ring shopping with Valerie the voice was there.

As he picked out the perfect ring for you the voice was there. His head was filled with doubts. Of course he loved you, he loved you more than anyone or anything in the world. He knew you loved him. His love for you was immortal, unconditional but he wasn’t so sure if it was the same for you.

That voice in his head hammering doubts over and over again it made him nervous. He started to wonder if he should bring the ring back. If he should change his mind. It was that voice.

“What if she gets tired of you like her husband did with her? What if she finds someone better than you? What if she doesn’t love you as much as you love her? Could you handle the heartbreak Aoi? Could you?”

He started getting distant from you, less kisses in the morning, leaving without saying goodbye, barely initiating sex, it made you worried. What if he’s getting tired of you like Declan? You texted him wanting to meet at the cafe after work. He just sent back a simple “okay”.

Reading it made you even more nervous than before. When you were done with work you drove as slow as you possibly could to the nearby parking lot. You opened the door to the cafe and once you looked around you saw Todo there, fidgeting.

“Is he going to end things with me? We were supposed to move to the new house next week.” You wondered to yourself, you both had so many plans for the future but the future is uncertain.

You sat down and it was silent. He nudged your drink over to you and that was the most interaction you got from him since you got there. It killed you to not talk to him and it was killing him too.

“Y/N, I’m scared.”

You looked into his eyes and saw the fear within them. But what could he possibly be scared about?

“Aoi, what’s wrong? What’s scaring you?”

“What if you get tired of me? What if you meet someone better than me? What if—”

“Aoi. Stop that please” your voice started shaking, it broke your heart to see the man you love being plagued with such fears.

“Aoi, I love you. I love you more than anything in the world. You’re my love. You’re my soulmate. You make me happier than anyone in this world. You brighten up my day, the small things you do make me fall even more in love with you.”

You got up and bent down to hug him. You pulled back holding his face in your hands.

“Aoi I will never get tired of you. I let you leave me once and I never plan on doing it ever again. I love you Aoi Todo, I will love you until my heart stops beating and I will love you long after that. In every life I will look for you to recreate this love over and over again. If I had to go back in time I would go through this all over again just to be right here with you.”

Tears were falling down both of your faces by the time you stopped speaking. You wiped his tears away and he lifted his hands to wipe yours away. He pulled your face closer to his and kissed you.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry I’m so so sorry.”

He muttered apologies against your lips and when you both pulled away it was his turn to speak. You sat back down holding his hands above the table.

“I just got scared Y/N. I love you so much and I just can’t imagine my life without you. I look forward to the future with you, I want you by my side through every single endeavor. You’re my everything. You’re the sun that brightens my day. You’re the stars that shine through my night sky. You’re the air that I breathe. I love you.”

You stood up and pulled him along with you as you both walked out of the cafe. You drove the both of you home and once you entered you led him to the bedroom. Once you entered you undid his work shirt and pants stripping him to his underwear. You led him to the bed and sat him down.

“I never want you to question my love for you ever again.”

You kissed him and placed kisses down his body. Little nibbles along his pecs, a flick of your tongue along his nipples, slow sensual kisses until you reached the waistband of his boxers. You tugged at the waistband and he lifted his hips to help you properly take them off.

His cock slapped against his abdomen. You took it in your hand and gave it a few gentle strokes. You placed featherlight kisses from the head of his cock to the base. You took his head into your mouth swirling your tongue around it and letting it go with a pop.

You took your hand and spit on it using it to lube his cock for you and you started to take more of him into your mouth. His moans and groans filling the room along with the sounds of you gagging yourself on his cock.

When you popped up for air looking at him he could swear he just saw a goddess in front of him. Even with your saliva and tears coating your face he has never seen anyone more beautiful than you. Even Aphrodite herself could not even come close to your beauty.

You got up and stripped off your clothing. You pushed him back gently to lay on the bed as you straddled him aligning his cock with your pussy. You sunk yourself down onto him, he tossed his head back into the bed feeling your warm slick walls welcome him in.

You started moving up and down slowly before gaining a rhythm bouncing on his cock. You moved your upper body close to his grabbing his face and making eye contact.

“I love you—ah fuck—Aoi. I love you so much. You fuck me so good. You are so handsome. Thank you for loving me.”

You felt his arms reach around your waist as planted his feet on the ground to pound into you. Once he started jackhammering into you repeatedly hitting your g-spot you felt yourself cumming around him over and over again.

He used this position to pull as many orgasms as he could from you until he had his own and with how tight you were around him it would be extremely soon. You felt his cock twitch inside you.

“Please cum inside me Aoi, please please please. I need you to fill me up please I need your cum.”

He pulled you down and his hips lifted bottoming out inside you, filling you with his cum. You let your full weight go onto him as you were catching your breath. Hard breaths filled the room. You looked at him and kissed him again.

“I love you Aoi.”

“I love you more Y/N.”

The following week you both moved into your forever home. Todo made dinner and ordered your favorite dessert to celebrate the move. It was also the day that he was going to propose. He knew how much you hated public proposals and receiving unnecessary attention so why not do it at home?

When you were doing the dishes making small conversation on how you saw a documentary about female serial killers he got the ring and went on one knee.

“So all of her victims were just random men who had green eyes, isn’t that—”

“Y/N.”

You turned around and dropped the sponge in your hand. Your jaw drops at the sight of the man you love and the most beautiful ring you have ever seen.

“Y/N, you have made me the happiest man the past year and four months. Time with you has been amazing. You make me feel like I have been floating on air and I never want to come down. I love you so much. Will you continue this journey of life with me, as my wife?”

“Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!”

You bent down to kiss him and he slipped the ring on your left finger. A few seconds later Valerie called, already aware of what Todo was planning to do. You set the date of the wedding six months from the day of the proposal.

The wedding was small and filled with only close friends and family. It was the happiest day of your life and everyone preferred Todo over your ex husband, even your father, who never liked any of your boyfriends.

“I like this guy a lot Y/N, I mean I’ve always liked him.”

“Dad you threatened to hunt him down when we first started dating in high school.”

“Oh honey it’s just dad stuff but that was a promise and it still stands.”

“Dad! He’s not like that, he makes me feel like I’m the only woman in the world and like I’m a precious gem.”

You both looked over at Todo sharing a dance with your mom and when he looked at you, you could see your future in them. Wherever he would go you would be there beside him as his wife.

“this ring you gave me a few months ago is proof of our love and the ring I gave you on your left ring finger is also proof of my love and dedication to you.” Todo leaned forward and kissed you holding you in his arms. 

“I never thought that one person could make me feel so loved and make me feel so much love for them Y/N.”

Now married life was doing the both of you well. Nothing could tear the both of you apart. Not even the news on your one year anniversary that you both were going to have your first child. If Todo felt like he was on cloud nine before then holding your beautiful, healthy son in his arms made him feel he was in seventh heaven. 

A/N pt2: thank you all for reading this, I’m really excited about how this work turned out I hope you all enjoyed it. This is by far my longest fic so I really appreciate you reading it through. I have much more on the way, if you have any requests my ask is open! Again thank you so much for reading I appreciate you all! — D <3

[hopefulobjectmiracle]

wearing the smile you gave me

This fic was prompted by a sweet anon, and I decided to dedicate it to my dear friend @randomcanbian because I love her. I know the next few days will be hard for you, and I hope this makes your week a little less difficult 💕

Pairing: Brittany S. Pierce/Santana Lopez

Prompt: “My shirt is way too big on you...but it’s cute”

Words: ~2.3k

Additional Info: Fluff, Canon Compliant, Married!Brittana, Future Fic. 

Read on AO3

-

Brittany wakes to the soft sound of snoring. The clock next to her bed reads 6:04 AM, but it’s still dark outside.

She rolls over in her bed and breathes a sigh of relief. Santana had gotten home last night, safe and sound. Not that she wouldn’t have, but New York is a dangerous city; one that the two of them hadn’t spent much time in together prior to their wedding. And so Brittany couldn’t help but worry about her anyway. 

It’s been four months since the wedding, and married life has been treating them well. They've settled into their new apartment fairly seamlessly, and have been taking classes at Columbia together just like they always planned. Santana would never admit this to Mr. Schuester, but his ‘hunch’ from way back when had turned out to be right - she really did want to go into law in order to make a difference in the world. Preparing for law is difficult, but Santana is loving that she gets to have such an important goal. Brittany is taking classes part-time in the math department, spending most of her time training at the Paul Taylor Dance Company. 

It’s not easy, though. Santana often works late nights at the diner to earn extra money - late nights that keep Brittany up worrying about her. Occasionally, like yesterday, their schedules don’t overlap and they aren’t able to spend time alone together. There are bills to pay, classes to attend, and responsibilities that neither one would have ever dreamed of as a teenager. And yet - it’s perfect, because it’s the two of them. Brittany thinks that her teenage self would be damn proud of where they are today. 

Now, Santana lies next to Brittany, her dark hair fanned out across her face and her features lax with sleep. Brittany smiles as she traces a finger across Santana’s cheek. This is her Santana, hers alone; the soft, sweet girl that no one but her ever gets to see. And Brittany gets to spend the rest of her life with her. She gets to wake up every morning to that beautiful face, spend her entire day loving this incredible woman, and go to sleep every night knowing that Santana will be right next to her. 

Forever. 

This thought alone sparks Brittany’s every nerve, and is enough to send Brittany stumbling out of bed, deciding that she isn’t going to be able to fall asleep again before sunrise. Four months in, and it’s finally hit her on this dark, cold morning - this is it. This is forever with the girl she loves. 

She quickly smoothes the blankets over Santana, presses a soft kiss to her forehead, and all but sprints to the kitchen of their tiny condo. Lord Tubbington, whom Brittany hadn’t even realized was awake, uses this as an opportunity to climb onto their dining table, attempting to make himself at home in their fruit bowl. 

“Quiet, you!” Brittany whispers. “Don’t be an asshole, Santana needs her rest.” Lord Tubbington hisses at her, and Brittany sighs and picks him up, depositing him on the kitchen counter. He mewls in protest, and she jabs her finger at him. “Behave. My wife needs sleep, and I will not have you and your gang ruining it.” She sneaks a glance back into the bedroom. Santana is thankfully still asleep, and Brittany breathes out another sigh of relief. She turns back to Lord Tubbington and says, “I’m keeping an eye on you, mister.”

Brittany leans forward and opens a couple of cupboards mindlessly, unsure of what to make for her wife’s breakfast. It’s a rare free Saturday morning, and she is not going to let it go to waste when she can do something special instead. She sifts through the ingredients they have in their fridge, making a mental note to stock up on bagels. Brittany sighs. She wishes that NYC had at least one Breadstix - she isn’t really the best cook, and Santana only deserves the best. 

Still, Brittany thinks Santana will appreciate anything Brittany makes for her, because she knows that what really matters to Santana is that Brittany loves her enough to make an effort. Even if that effort results in burnt lasagna. Which is an event that Santana has sworn to never bring up again. 

Brittany shakes that thought away. Santana’s had a hard week, and Brittany needs to do everything in her power to make it better. She spins around the kitchen again and grabs the recipe book they keep on the counter. She flips through it, landing on a page with a list of Italian recipes. She scans the pasta section, hoping to find something easy enough to make. Raviolis, farfalle, fusilli...

Fettuccine Alfredo. Bingo. 

Brittany thinks back to her wedding, when Kurt and Blaine burst out laughing when that dish was served for dinner. Apparently, when Sue had locked them in that elevator - a scheme that Brittany had no involvement in, thank you very much - Sue had slipped them a basket of Breadstix food, including a recipe for the pasta. A couple of weeks ago during a drunken night out, Kurt had been so gracious as to share it with Brittany, and ever since then, she’s had it in her back pocket; an ace up her sleeve that she had forgotten about until now. It’s Santana’s favorite, and Kurt’s recipe is simple enough that even Brittany can’t screw it up. 

Brittany takes out her phone and scrolls through her pictures until she finds the recipe. She sets the phone on the counter and gets to work, pulling out the noodles, parmesan cheese, garlic, butter, and cream. She turns the stove on, placing a pot of water on the burner. As she’s boiling the water, Lord Tubbington climbs up next to her, knocking her phone off in the process. 

“Damn it, I told you to stay away,” Brittany snaps, making a shooing motion at Lord Tubbington. She crouches down and looks at her phone, checking to make sure that no damage has been done. 

On the screen is now a photo of the night Santana came to visit Brittany at the dance studio, complete with a big bouquet of flowers. That had been one of the most magical days of her training at the studio, and Santana being there had only made the night better. Brittany picks up her phone and beams. Not for the first time tonight, Brittany is made aware of how lucky she is to be able to have this life with Santana. She places the phone onto the counter again and begins grating the cheese. 

Hours later, Brittany is stirring the alfredo sauce on the pan, contemplating the possibility of a four-dimensional cube within the macroscopic universe, when Santana comes padding into the kitchen. “Hey,” Santana says, startling Brittany out of her reverie. 

“Hi!” 

“Mmmm...that smells so good,” Santana says, stroking Brittany’s arm and inhaling the scents of garlic and cream with a sleepy grin on her face. “What’re you making?”

“It’s a surprise,” Brittany sing-songs. “And good morning, honey,” she says, giving Santana a kiss on the cheek. Santana yawns and rubs her eyes, her hair sticking in every direction. It’s the most gorgeous thing Brittany has ever seen, and - oh. 

This is new. 

Santana is wearing Brittany’s MIT shirt. The oversized one that Brittany used to throw on daily when she was at the school. The one that was her only source of comfort so far away from home; the one that she put away after reuniting with Santana because she simply didn’t need it anymore. 

Now, it somehow looks even better on the person that is Brittany’s forever home. The shirt hangs loose on Santana’s diminutive frame. She’s not wearing anything under it, and that makes her look even more appealing than Brittany had ever thought a T-shirt would look on any one person. 

“You’re wearing my shirt,” Brittany says wonderingly. 

“Yeah, babe, is that okay?” 

“Okay? I...” Brittany is at a loss for words. She slides her hands down Santana’s lovely arms and yanks her in for a kiss. She cups Santana’s face, holding her close and keeping their foreheads pressed together after they break the kiss. 

“I’m going to take that a yes,” Santana says, grinning as she pulls back. 

“You look incredible,” Brittany breathes. “You have no idea how much I-”

A loud noise goes off right then, making both girls jump. Brittany hurries back to her saucepan, pouring its contents into a bowl. 

“What exactly is that?” Santana says, peering over Brittany’s shoulder. Brittany spins around and covers Santana’s eyes.

“No, Santana! It’s supposed to be a surprise,” Brittany says, steering Santana away from the stove. 

“I want to help you,” Santana says, attempting to push past her back into the kitchen. “You don’t have to do this all by you- ”

“No can do, honey,” Brittany says, sweeping her hands down Santana’s back and hoisting her up from underneath. 

“Britt - ah - what!” Santana yells as Brittany picks her up. She struggles to get out of Brittany’s arms. “Put me down!”

“Sorry,” Brittany says, adjusting Santana in her arms. She walks over to the bedroom and deposits Santana onto the bed, sending her tumbling into the mattress. “You stay here until the food is ready.”

Santana faux-glares at her from where she’s sprawled on the bed, and then sighs in defeat. “Okay. I love you.”

“I love you too.” Brittany leans in and kisses Santana’s forehead. “Stay here.” 

Brittany races back to the kitchen, pouring the sauce over her noodles and sprinkling the remaining cheese over them. She takes out the orange juice from the fridge, removes the muffins from the microwave, and neatly arranges everything onto a tray. She carries the tray to the bedroom, careful not to trip over Lord Tubbington’s now-sleeping form. 

Santana’s face lights up when she sees Brittany, and she gasps in awe as she takes in the breakfast Brittany made. Santana ducks her head, bashful and so, so cute. “Britt,” she says, smiling softly. “You made all of this for me?”

“Only the best for you, babe.”

“How did you do it? I thought...” Santana trails off. “You’ve always said that you can’t cook. But you made my favorite meal for me.”

“A chef never reveals her secrets,” Brittany says, winking at her. She makes a mental note to thank Kurt at their next night out. 

“Oh, yeah?” Santana teases. She leans in closer. “And what else does this mysterious chef do?”

“Right now, she just wants her wife to eat her breakfast,” Brittany says.

Santana rolls her eyes. “Okay, okay. But you need to come eat with me.” She sets aside the tray and draws back the covers, gesturing for Brittany to join her in the bed. Brittany crawls in and tucks herself against Santana, pulling the blankets back over them. Santana sets the tray on their knees and hands her a fork. The two of them sit in companionable silence for a couple of minutes, taking turns feeding each other small bites of the food; just relishing in each other’s company. 

“You know what?” Brittany says suddenly. 

Santana swallows down a bite of pasta. “Hmm?”

“This shirt that you’re wearing…” Brittany reaches out and gently fingers the fabric. “This is what I used to wear when I was away. I don’t know why, but it would always make me feel safe. It helped me when I was isolated from you and all of our friends. It made me feel less alone.”

Santana nods her head in understanding. “So, how come you don’t wear it anymore? It’s pretty badass, and I bet you looked so cute in it. It’d be perfect for late nights when I’m at the diner.”

Brittany shrugs. “I don’t need it now. I have you to make me feel safe. Even when you’re not here physically, I have the knowledge that you’re my wife,” she says, showing off her wedding ring. “You believed in me when no one else did, you supported me through everything that happened before MIT, and you even managed to figure out that I wasn’t happy and got me the hell out of there. Why would I need some old shirt when I have you, my darling wife, to keep me safe?”

Santana grabs Brittany’s hand and kisses it. “You make me feel safe too, Britt,” she says earnestly. “Life is so, so hard sometimes, and you make me feel like it’s okay to just be myself in a world that doesn’t always like me.” She looks down and presses her lips together. “Growing up, I never thought I would have that. I always thought I’d marry a man, and he’d sit around judging me on everything I did.” 

Brittany winces, remembering how heartbroken Santana was for most of their high school years and how long she’d had to struggle with her feelings. She remembers too, how her own heart broke every time Santana recited a hypothetical future with some nameless man, knowing that it would never make her truly happy. 

“I never thought I’d be able to feel so free and so loved,” Santana continues. She cups Brittany’s cheek. “But here you are,” she says, grinning helplessly. 

“Here I am,” Brittany agrees, bringing their lips together in a soft, slow kiss. Brittany tries to pour all the love in her heart into that kiss, hoping that through the kiss, Santana will feel even a fraction of the infinite love Brittany holds for her. 

“And I’m going to stay with you, Santana. I’m going to love you and make you feel like this for the rest of your life.”

“I’m going to do the same for you, Britt.”

As they lie together, talking, kissing, loving one another, their stomachs so full, their bodies so comfortable, and their hearts so happy, Brittany thinks once again that this is really it for them. 

This is forever, and Brittany wouldn’t have it any other way.

[avengerscompound]

The Tower: Happily Ever After - 5

The Tower: Happily Ever After An Avengers Fanfic

Series Masterlist | Character Refrence PREVIOUS //

Pairing:  Avengers x OFC, Bruce Banner x Bucky Barnes x Clint Barton x Wanda Maximoff x Steve Rogers x Natasha Romanoff x Tony Stark x Thor x Sam Wilson x OFC (Elly Cooper)

Word Count: 1601

Warnings:  Pregnancy

Synopsis: Almost 40 years after Elise Cooper first crashed into Natasha Romanoff outside the library at Columbia University, she and the Avengers are adapting to a near-immortal life together with their large brood of children.  Yet things aren’t perfect.  Life is moving on without them and they’re starting to discover who isolating being immortal can be.When Angela comes and asks Thor to take the throne of Asgard once more, the group leaves Earth in the hopes that they will find their Happily Ever After there.

Chapter 5: Farewell to Our Old Life

It was kind of strange how little there was to organize for us regarding our move.  There was packing, but we couldn’t exactly hire a moving truck so it needed to fit in bags that we could carry or it had to stay behind.  That was difficult.  We had had a long time to collect a lot of things we considered precious to us.  The glass artwork that Thor and I had inadvertently made on our honeymoon was the thing I wished we could bring the most.  It would stay in the fountain in the entry and hopefully, we’d come back sometimes and see it.

Thankfully, most of our things were fairly portable.  We also wouldn’t need a lot of clothes because Asgard would provide things more fitting for the palace, and it’s not like we would need any furniture.  Mostly it was just personal effects and tech that Tony wanted to use there.

Other than that it was just letting the doctors know I was leaving, pulling Marya out of school, and organizing the party.

It was still leaning on the stressful side though - especially considering we were still waiting to hear what the rest of the kids were going to do.

Even though Rose and Paul had appeared closest to deciding to come, it was Billy and Teddy who came back to us first with a yes.  They had also said they wanted to do a bonding ceremony when we were there, which added another level of excitement and another level of stress.

Rose and Paul came next.  They said that they would try it out and see.  The concern about their children’s lifespan was a big issue for them, but Paul also said he’d be crazy to give up at least trying to live on Asgard as actual royalty.

As expected it was Eddie who took the longest to decide.  He really did love his job, and I think even with his talk about having children, he, Lyra, and Rory were still right into the rich, young party lifestyle.  He was worried about what they’d lose going to Asgard, rather than focusing on the things he might gain. 

No one pressured him though.  Any questions the three had were answered as honestly as we could and if we didn’t know we’d send word back to Asgard and Loki would come and give the answers they were looking for if at all possible.  Eventually, he decided that he’d give it six months for us to settle and make sure things with Stark Industries and the Avengers was transitioning smoothly given our sudden departure, and then he and his family would join us there to try it out.  He mentioned maybe doing six months on each planet or returning to Earth for a month or two every year, but we were all just glad he was willing to try it out, and his delayed departure from Earth was a good idea.  He even promised to come and visit when his new siblings were born.

When our goodbye party began, the whole family was excited for this new chapter in our lives and sad to say goodbye to the last.

Many of our friends were elderly or had passed on, so the party was going to be a mixture of different people.  Clarke was still around, though Jax had passed a few years ago.  We’d lost Rhodey and Fury, though Hill was still running the day-to-day operations of the Avengers, even in her old age, and Coulson had retired after years as successfully being director of SHIELD.  Vision was the same as ever, and people often came to him for direction when it came to the Avengers.  Carol also hadn’t changed though she still spent more time in space than on Earth.  A lot of the people we had met that had seemed so young when we met them, were all not officially middle-aged.  Even Peter Parker who was only fifteen when I met him was now pushing fifty and had a wife and daughter of his own.

They would all be at the party, including a lot of the new Avengers lineup.  Most of whom were much heavier hitters than any of us, even when we were wielding Mjolnir.  It was definitely going to be sad to say goodbye.

“It’s going to be okay, you know?”  Wanda said, snapping me out of my mini-trance as she ran a brush methodically through my hair.

“No, I know,” I said, tilting my head back.

“Then tell your brain that,” she teased.

I giggled and leaned up and pecked her lips.  “I’m sorry.  I would if I could.  Just hormones I guess.  Feeling stressed.”

“Well, stop it,” she scolded playfully.  “It’s bad for the babies.”

She began to braid my hair and I hummed as her fingertips grazed over my scalp.  “Imagine it though, Elly,” Wanda said.  “All the kids nearby - the new babies.”

“You’re a baby-oholic,” I said, laughing softly.

“It’s true,” she says.  “I am.”

She ran a hand around my side and pressed it on my stomach.  “I can’t wait to meet them,” she said.  “They already have such busy thoughts.”

I looked up at her and I’m not sure whether it was the look of pure and complete love in her eyes or the way the light caught in her hair, but I was struck by how beautiful she was and how much I loved her.  She smiled and pressed a kiss to my forehead.  “I love you too,” she said and picked up a strand of silver wire with black opal and threaded it into my hair.  “All done.”

I stood carefully and straightened out the skirts on my blue lace cocktail dress.  “How do I look?” I asked.

“Perfect as always,” she said.  “Let's go say goodbye to our friends.”

We made our way down to the party deck where the party was only just starting up.  Bruce, Steve, and Clint were all already there, but there was no sign of Tony, Natasha, Clint, Sam, Thor, or Bucky.

Some of our kids were there and their kids all played out in the garden atrium that was built on the protruding wing of the tower and the party deck opened out into.  I greeted everyone and as I made my way around the room more people arrived.

Clarke came over and tapped me on the shoulder.  I turned and smiled, hugging her tightly.  She had aged well, not as well as I had obviously, but while her face was lined and she was a little frailer looking, she had kept in good shape and she continued to color her hair.  It would be easy to think she was in her early fifties rather than her mid-seventies.  Her eyes were what gave it away.  What had once been vivid violet had faded to pale lavender and were slightly cloudy.  They were heavily lined at the corners, the years having carved deep crevices to mark each time she was happy or sad or angry or worried.  It was still my Clarke though and I was going to miss her.

“I can’t believe you’re not going to be here when these two are born,” she said, indicating to my stomach as we pulled apart.  She was one of the select group of people I would be totally fine with touching my stomach unasked - but she never assumed.  “Where am I going to get my baby kisses from?”

I laughed and shook my head.  “I guess you’ll have to visit me on Asgard.”

“You can do that?”  She asked.

“I mean… I’m the Queen.  I think I can pull some strings,” I teased.

She laughed.  “God, thinking of you as a Queen is such a trip.”

“Hey Auntie Clarke,” Billy said, appearing behind us.  “I haven’t seen you for a while.”

Clarke hugged him and looked around.  “It’s been too long.  Where are those kids of yours.”

“Come on, I’ll take you to them,” he looked over at me and narrowed his eyes.  “You go sit down, mom.  You know you’re supposed to be taking it easy.”

“I am taking it easy,” I argued, holding up my hands.  “I’m just standing here.”

“Go on,” he said.  “Don’t make me page Dad Tony.”

“Heaven forbid,” I laughed and he wrinkled his nose at me and led Clarke out to the atrium.  I got myself a little plate of appetizers and a glass of punch and went and took a seat.

It wasn’t long until the whole room was teeming with people.  The Avengers had gotten to be a rather large collection of people since the original six had been reluctantly dragged together all those years ago.  Having so many of the people who meant so much to all of us here at the same time couldn’t help but make me think about how I’d first joined this group that would one day be my family.

All those years ago I had been a traumatized woman in her mid-twenties, just trying to get by.  I didn’t have many good friends, because it took a lot for me to trust people.  It took a superhero to get through and with her, so many other people flooded in after.  I was so grateful to them, and so in love with each of them to this day.  It would be hard letting this life of ours go, but it was inevitable.  I still had my 9 chosen people though, and I always would.  I was glad to be taking this next step with them at my side.

// NEXT

[doc-pickles]

anywhere i want (just not home)

I didn't have it in myself to go with grace

And so the battleships will sink beneath the waves

You had to kill me, but it killed you just the same

For the love of my life, the inspiration behind TS week, the wind in my sails… Happy later birthday @odd-birds-and-booksellers I hope you enjoy this

Always, Your Computer Wife,

Nina

+

We gather here, we line up

Weepin' in a sunlit room, and

If I'm on fire, you'll be made of ashes too

Even on my worst day, did I deserve, babe

All the hell you gave me?

The pain in her cheek is still stinging as she struggles to open her eyes. There’s the faintest hint of sunlight filtering through the large window of her bedroom, a new day just beginning only hours after she’d finally been left alone long enough to find some peace.

The bed next to her is cold and empty, Paul having left for work while she was still crying and groaning in pain. He hadn’t spared her a second glance as he’d gotten dressed for the day, stepping over the puddle of blood that had collected on the floor where she’d laid for hours as he kicked her mercilessly, hurling harsh blows and leering insults as she’d tried to protect herself.

She pulls herself up and drags her barely conscious body to the shower, rinsing off the dried blood and sweat as she tends to the wounds she can see. She already knows she has at least one bruised rib and a sprained ankle, but she can’t do much about it now. For now all she can do is rinse off, lay in bed and hope that tonight doesn’t bring more of the same.

+

Jo bolts upright in bed, hand pressed to her chest as she attempts to slow her breathing down. The dream echoes in the back of her head, the painful memories replaying themselves in vivid technicolor right before her eyes.

She knows why they’re haunting her again, knows that he’s looking for her right now and that he won’t stop until he’s found her. Paul has made that much clear with his texts and letters, little signs to make it clear that they’re not done yet.

A hand closes over hers and she almost jumps before she remembers where she is. Jo squeezes Alex’s hand back, letting him pull her back down and into his embrace. As soon as his arms circle around her she can feel her body begin to calm down.

“It’s not even 2 AM, try and get some sleep, you need it,” Alex’s voice in her ears convinces her to close her eyes, even if sleep is far off the feeling of him so close helps to relax her. “I’ll be here when you wake up.”

'Cause I loved you, I swear I loved you

'Til my dying day

It’s later that same day when Jo receives another text, the ping stopping her during rounds and prompting her to make a flimsy excuse to Meredith as she rushes to the nearest bathroom.

Can’t wait to see you soon, both of you.

The text lingers in her mind as her breakfast reappears, tears flowing as she tries to drown out the overwhelming noise in her mind. Paul didn’t make empty threats, that’s one thing she knew for sure. The texts she was receiving were just the tip of the iceberg for whatever he had in store for her.

“Jo? You in here?”

She can barely respond to Alex in between crying and being sick, her body overwhelmed as she tries to keep herself calm. Jo can hear Alex saying something incomprehensible as she begins to hyperventilate, his voice growing further away as her breathing became more ragged.

The last thing Jo registers before everything goes black is Alex holding her against his chest, his fingers threading through her hair in an attempt to calm her as his heartbeat echoed unsteadily in her ears.

When she comes back around Jo’s not shocked to find herself laying in a hospital bed, an IV and monitoring wires hooked up to her pale skin. Before she has a chance to overthink anything though Alex is in front of her, his hands running down her cheeks and wiping away the tears she hadn���t realized had collected there.

“Why didn’t you tell me? I could’ve helped you,” Alex’s voice is soft as she meets his eyes, his gaze causing her to melt into another round of tears. “Oh Jo, it’s okay.”

“It’s not! He’s going to kill me, he already knows where I am and this time he’s going to make sure I don’t survive,” Jo chokes the words out, her fingers ghosting over her protruding stomach. “Alex, he's not going to leave me alone until both of us are dead. I can’t put our baby at risk like that.”

The thought almost makes her sick again, her daughter kicking against her hand as she draws in a deep breath. Of all the wild and unexpected things her and Alex had been through, their daughter was by far her favorite. Even with a few weeks left until she arrived Jo already felt a fierce instinct to protect the little girl growing in her womb.

“I’m not going to let him get anywhere near the two of you, I promise,” Alex brushes back a few strands of hair lingering on her forehead, pressing a kiss to the cool skin as he settles into the bed next to her. “You’re safe with me Jo, both of you are.”

I didn't have it in myself to go with grace

Jo wants to believe Alex, she really does. Since her breakdown over Paul’s threats he had been by her side whenever he could. His presence was comforting but it did little to calm the raging mental battle she was fighting inside her head.

Now though, as she stares down at her daughter sleeping peacefully in her arms, she knows that she made the right decision. She just hopes Alex agrees with her.

“She's perfect, you did so good,” Alex had repeated the words over and over since Isla had made her appearance almost six hours ago, but they still prompt a smile on Jo’s face. “I love you two so much.”

“I love you, we both do,” Jo leans up and captures his lips with her own, lingering a little longer than she normally would as Alex’s fingers trace her cheek delicately. “Would you do me a big favor? I left my robe at home and it’s freezing in here. Could you go home real quick and grab it?”

Alex nods, a grin on his face as he stands from the chair at her bedside and gathers his keys and wallet. Jo watches him intently, memorizing every movement and expression that makes him exactly the man she fell in love with. He leans down to press one more kiss to her forehead then Isla’s before promising to be back soon.

As the door to her hospital room shuts, Jo looks down at her daughter, tears splashing onto the newborn's cheeks as her mother watches her, “Your daddy loves you very much, don’t you ever forget that.”

And you're the hero flying around, saving face

“Alex, are you coming to work today? It’s been a week,” Meredith’s voice rings out from the doorway of the loft, but Alex can’t bring himself to answer her. She’d been by everyday since he’d come home, her voice prodding at him the only sound in the loft.

He’d gone home to get Jo’s robe like she’d asked, finally finding it tucked away at the very back of the closet instead of hanging in the bathroom like it usually was. On his way back to her room, he’d stopped in the hospital gift shop and grabbed the fluffiest pink and white teddy bear sitting in the window. He had told the cashier that his daughter had just been born and showed off the photo of Jo and Isla that was already his phone lock screen.

And then he’d gone upstairs, the missing robe and teddy bear tumbling from his hands as he found an empty bed and bassinet, Jo and Isla’s bags gone from the room that they’d occupied not even an hour before when he’d left. He’d asked every nurse and doctor on shift but no one had an answer for him. When he finally made it back to the room, he saw the note hastily scribbled across a spare piece of paper, his knees giving way as he read the words printed in Jo’s recognizable script.

I couldn’t let him find us, I’m so sorry. Please don’t worry, we’re safe.

Love you always.

J & I

He’d sat on the floor of the hospital room until Meredith had come to collect him at the bidding of the nurses on the floor. She’d given him a sympathetic look and held him as he cried, only letting his guard down for his closest friend.

The reality hadn’t truly sunk in until he came home later that night to an empty loft filled with baby gear and the scent of Jo lingering on every surface. He’d screamed then, throwing pillows and couch cushions and anything he could find in an attempt to get some of his emotions out in the open.

It hadn’t helped though, the sadness he’d felt morphing into feelings of anger and helplessness. Alex knew that Jo was acting out of desperation, doing what she truly thought was right, and he couldn’t be mad at her for that. No, his anger was directed at the man that had pushed her to that point, had scared her and haunted her every move so horribly that she’d fled Seattle with their newborn daughter in tow.

As he ignores Meredith for yet another day, Alex let his mind wander to Jo and Isla for a moment. He knows Jo would never run with their daughter if she didn’t have a plan to keep her safe, but just the knowledge that they were out there without him broke his heart.

And if I'm dead to you, why are you at the wake?

Cursing my name, wishing I stayed

Look at how my tears ricochet

His fingers press down the collar of the light blue button up once more before sliding the black suit jacket over it. He examines himself in the mirror of the hotel room one last time before turning to leave. He’d only been to Seattle once before for a medical conference, but this trip held a much more important air to it.

Brooke, his Brooke, was close. Closer than she’d ever been before and he couldn’t wait to see her again. He was delighted when he’d found her again, even more so when he found out that she was a doctor giving him the perfect opportunity to drop in on her. He couldn’t wait to see the look on her face when he saw her.

We gather stones, never knowing what they'll mean

Some to throw, some to make a diamond ring

When Alex finally makes it back to work he’s met with an abundance of pitying looks and unhelpful comments. He knows most of his coworkers have good intentions but he’s in the verge of screaming at the next person who interacts with him. All he wants to do is work and try and forget that his daughter and the love of his life aren’t waiting for him at home like they should be.

“Alex! I have someone I want you to meet,” Arizona’s bubbly voice almost makes Alex roll his eyes, the blonde not doing much to improve his demeanor since he was in no mood to meet anyone new. “This is Doctor Paul Stadler, he’s an expert on laparoscopic surgery techniques which is always helpful when we have tiny humans to save.”

Alex can feel his blood run cold as he turns towards Arizona and the man standing next to her. Whatever picture he had painted in his head fades as he stares at the man in front of him. Despite his bright grin Alex knows exactly what Paul is capable of, what he had done and threatened to do to Jo.

“While I’d love to meet your whole team Doctor Robbins, I’m not here on business today. I’m looking for Doctor Wilson actually.”

“Oh,” Arizona’s face falls, gaze turning to Alex as his jaw tightens. “Actually she’s-“

“She’s gone, she left,” Alex’s voice has an edge that makes even him flinch at how harsh and cold it is.

Paul eyes Alex for a moment, looking him over before speaking again, “That’s unfortunate. Would you happen to know where she is? I’d love to speak with her.”

“Well get in line then because I've been waiting for her to come home for the past three weeks,” Alex slams the iPad in his hands onto the counter of the nurses station, eyes ablaze as he stares Paul down. “You harassed her for months on end and scared her so much that she ran away with our daughter hours after giving birth.”

Paul attempts to conceal the smirk on his face but fails, causing Alex to step towards him with clenched fists. Arizona steps between the two men, fixing Alex with a hard stare.

“Back up Alex. I know that you’re upset about Jo but-“

“But nothing! He’s the reason my girlfriend and daughter are gone!”

“Okay why don’t you take the rest of the day off,” Arizona’s hands squeezing his shoulders finally breaks Alex’s gaze away from Paul whose face has broken into a full on shit eating grin. Arizona and Alex exchange a look and he can tell she’s holding back her anger now as well. “Alex, go home.”

How can I when they’re not there?

The question echoes in his mind the whole drive back to the loft, Alex’s heart constricting as he sat on the edge of his and Jo’s bed. The loft was still empty, sounds still echoing off the walls as he sat alone. His mind brings up the image of Jo and Isla sitting in their hospital room as he walked away, not knowing that was the last time he’d see them.

He leans forward, reaching into his dresser and rummages around his sock drawer for a minute before pulling out a velvet box. When Jo had told him she was pregnant he’d immediately gone out and bought the ring. Not because of Isla, but because starting a family with Jo was all the confirmation he needed that she was it for him. Now the box sat collecting dust in his drawer, it’s future uncertain as he wondered exactly where Jo was.

You know I didn't want to have to haunt you

But what a ghostly scene

“And this is your daddy and your Auntie Meredith. They love you so much,” despite knowing that the infant couldn’t understand what she said or even clearly see the photo she had pulled up on her phone, Jo made sure that Isla knew about all of the people they loved in Seattle. “Your daddy misses you so much, baby girl. I’m sorry I took you away from him, I know that makes me a crappy mom.”

“You’re not a crappy mom,” Jo looks from Isla to the man sitting next to her, his hand settling on her shoulder as he fixes her with a knowing look. “You did what you had to do.”

“Some days it doesn’t feel like that,” Jo sighs, her head falling to his shoulder as she fights back tears. “I took her from her dad! I took her away from the only family she’ll ever have, Link. And why? Because I’m scared?”

Link pulls back from Jo, meeting her eyes as he speaks, “You had every reason to run, you know that. I’ve seen what he’s capable of, I wouldn’t want to worry about that all the time if I were you. Especially with a newborn, I get it. So don’t feel too bad for yourself, I think you made the right choice.”

I didn't have it in myself to go with grace

'Cause when I'd fight, you used to tell me I was brave

“Jo?”

The lights in the loft are off but Jo’s car is parked out front. When he switches the lights on Alex sees Jo shoving clothes into a tote bag, tear stains tracking down her cheeks.

“Jo what are you doing?”

"I'm going to Stephanie’s for a few nights, just until I can figure things out.”

Jo’s voice is nervous and she's talking a mile a minute. She still hasn't looked up at Alex but he can see the bright red hives cropping up on her neck already.

"I'm sorry it was an accident but I’m going to

fix it. It's my fault, I'll fix it!”

"What are you talking about,” despite the fact that he's spoken up more than once Jo seems to be in a world of her own.

“Don't worry about it, you don't need more stress,” Jo’s hands are shaking as she closes the bag she's holding. "It's still early, it'll be an easy fix. I'm going to fix it, I have an appointment scheduled."

It clicks for Alex then just exactly what Jo is talking about. He sinks to his knees next to her tilting her chin up so she’ll finally look at him.

“Are you pregnant?”

"I'm sorry, I missed my birth control it was an accident," Jo’s tone is frantic now as more tears begin to fall. "I have an appointment, I'm going to fix it-“

"Jo slow down, I'm not mad so stop apologizing,” Alex wiped at the tears that had collected on Jo’s cheeks. "You don't want our baby?”

Jo blinked up at Alex as if nothing he was saying was making sense to her.

“What's actually the matter Jo? Why were you so scared to tell me?"

“I… I'm married."

“What?"

“I'm married to a guy who nearly beat me to death. And when I got pregnant I thought he'd

be happy and maybe he'd let up, instead he yelled and screamed and then he,” Jo pauses, eyes downcast as she looks down at her hands. “When he was done with me for the night I wasn't pregnant anymore.

“He wouldn't let me get birth control though so the next time I just solved the problem quietly. And when it happened a third time I ran. I ran and changed my name and never turned back,” Jo finally looks up and meets Alex’s gaze, eyes watery still as he watches her. “I had a miscarraige that time, probably because of how banged up I was. But it got me out of there. So when I started having the same symptoms again I freaked out.”

“Oh Jo…”

“Alex, I’m terrified of my past and of losing you and losing this baby… I’ve already lost far too much. I don’t want to lose any more.”

“You’re not going to lose me. I’m all in with you even if it means we never get married. You and this baby mean everything to me. That is if you want it.”

“Of course I do, I want this more than anything. I want kids with you, I really do but…”

“Okay then we’ll do it.”

“Really? You dont think I’m too damaged or crazy?”

“Yes Jo, I want all of that,” Alex pulled Jo into his lap, placing a hand over her stomach as he pressed a kiss to her forehead. “I love you and you’re just about the bravest person I’ve ever met.”

And if I'm dead to you, why are you at the wake?

Cursing my name, wishing I stayed

Look at how my tears ricochet

The room is spinning when she pries her eyes open, dried blood making the task difficult. She tries to sit up, but the pain radiating from her stomach keeps her down. She knows if she moves she’ll make it worse, but her body is in pain and she can’t lay in this position much longer.

As soon as she makes a move, the pain is back. She thinks it’s his foot that’s making contact with her ribs now, digging into her back as her body curls in on itself.

“Stop! Please!”

The cries are useless, they always are, but she hopes that maybe they’ll convince him to end her suffering sooner or throw the next punch a little softer.

“Please stop! Stop!”

Her shoulders are shaking as she blinks her eyes open again, a pair of blue eyes staring down at her in concern.

“It was just a nightmare, you’re okay and you’re safe,” Link’s words help to steady her heartbeat a little, her eyes moving to Isla who's peacefully sleeping in his arms. “I woke you up because I just turned the news on. Take a look.”

“Former Harvard University professor Paul Stadler was arrested early yesterday morning on charges of battery and assault against his girlfriend, who is still being treated for her injuries at Massachusetts General Hospital. Since his arrest, three more women have come forward with allegations against Stadler ranging from ongoing harassment to physical violence and sexual assault. Boston PD is asking any other victims to contact them at this time.”

Jo stares blankly at the television in front of her, eyes welling with tears as the news footage continues to roll. She wasn’t alone and she was so close to being free from Paul’s hold on her.

“You have to go to Boston, your testimony could put him away,” Link’s voice snaps her out of her reverie, eyes moving from the television to him. “Jo, he’s going to prison. You can finally be free.”

The hope that had ignited her heart just moments earlier was crushed as she played through the possibilities before her. What if she testified and Paul wasn’t put in prison? What if he continued to harass her? What if he hurt Isla? Or Alex?

“I can’t. I can’t face him again… There's too much on the line,” Jo looks away from Link, her tears finally falling. “I have too much to lose.”

“And you’ll be stuck right here if you don’t do anything!”

“At least I’ll be safe then.”

“And what about Alex? You’re okay never seeing him again? Never letting Isla see him?”

Jo stands suddenly, facing Link with an angry expression, “You don’t get to make the calls here Link! I appreciate everything you’ve done for us but I can’t risk everything when there’s not a guarantee that it’ll end up well.”

Jo storms out of the room then, complex emotions overwhelming her as she sinks into her bed. She wishes things were easier, were more black and white instead of the fuzzy grey she’d become so accustomed to. But they aren’t, they never would be with Paul and now she’d dragged Alex and Isla and even Link into the pools of grey she’d spent so long trying to avoid.

And I can go anywhere I want

Anywhere I want, just not home

Alex watched his phone ring for a moment, debating on picking up at all. He doesn’t recognize the number and he doesn’t know anyone from California. But he still clicks the green accept button, hoping whoever it was wasn’t going to waste his time.

“Hello?”

“Hi, I’m so glad you picked up.”

Alex freezes, stares at his phone for a moment, then brings it back up to his ear, “Jo? Is that you?”

“Yeah, it’s me,” there’s a long pause and Alex almost thinks she’s hung up before she begins to cry. “I’m so sorry Alex. I’m so sorry we left you. I didn’t know what else to do.”

“I know, I get why you left. I hate it but I understand,” a sigh leaves him as he rests his head against the wall next to him, tears forming in his eyes as well, “Are you okay?”

“Yes we’re both fine, I wouldn’t have left if I didn’t have somewhere safe to run to,” Jo sucks in a breath, as if her next words are taking everything out of her. “Paul is going to prison.”

“I know, I saw. Are you going to testify?”

“I don’t know. I want to but… There's too much at risk. I don’t want him to hurt you or Isla.”

Just the sound of his daughter's name tugs at Alex’s heart, the tears that had been welling in his eyes spilling onto his cheeks.

“If you don’t go you’re going to be living in fear for the rest of your life. But if you do, you can get closure. And you can save more people from getting hurt by Paul.”

She lets his words sink in for a moment before he hears her voice again, “I miss you so much.”

“I miss you too, you and Isla both,” Alex can hear shuffling in the background, a deep voice and then a small cry.

“I have to go, Alex.”

“Wait Jo-”

“I love you. We both do.”

“I love you too.”

The line goes dead then and Alex can’t help the sob that breaks from his chest. He misses Jo, misses Isla, misses the feeling of wholeness that came to him when he would climb into bed with Jo at the end of every day.

And you can aim for my heart, go for blood

But you would still miss me in your bones

Alex doesn't know what drives him to fly to Boston, but he feels a small sense of relief when he sees Paul Stadler in the defendant's seat. A sick feeling makes itself at home in the pit of his stomach as he watches half a dozen women testify to the horrors that Paul had put them through, detailing the ways he had tormented them. Jo had never gone into detail to him but if what she went through was even half as bad as what he was hearing then he understood why she had gone to such extremes to hide from Paul.

He watches as the final woman testifies and finds her seat again, the courtroom silent except for the prosecuting attorneys whispering among themselves. Finally, one of the lawyers stands and addresses the courtroom, “Your honor, we’d like to call our final witness. The prosecution calls Brooke Elizabeth Stadler, now Josephine Alice Wilson, to the stand.”

Alex feels the air leave his lungs as he watches Jo approach the bench. Her hair is shorter and a dirty blonde color but she’s still the same woman he knows so well. The dark blue dress she’s wearing sways lightly as she takes the stand, stating her name and swearing in before she begins to give her testimony. Jo explains how she and Paul met, how they married, and then she goes into the abuse she endured. Alex listens to the detailed accounts she gives, accompanied by the numerous hospital reports.

“And then one day I got sick of it and I ran. I knew Paul would find me though so I fled the state and changed my name. I started a new life and I have a beautiful daughter,” Jo finally meets Alex’s gaze and he gets the overwhelming urge to wrap her up in his arms and hold her close. “But Paul found me again and he was threatening me so as soon as my daughter was born I ran again. I left behind my new life, the only place I’ve ever felt safe because I knew he would find me again and I couldn’t risk him hurting my daughter.”

The air in the courtroom is thick as Jo’s words sink in. Alex knows he’s not the only one who’s been affected by her testimony and the words of everyone that went before her. The prosecutor thanks Jo, the defending attorney waiving their right to question her. As she steps down from the stand she meets Alex’s gaze for a moment before turning away and going back to her seat.

And I still talk to you (when I'm screaming at the sky)

And when you can't sleep at night (you hear my stolen lullabies)

“Jurors, have you come to a decision?”

“We have your honor,” there’s a tense silence in the courtroom as the decision is handed off to the judge. “We find the defendant Paul Stadler guilty on all charges.” A breath of relief leaves Alex as he turns to look at Jo. There’s tears streaming down her face and the slightest hint of a smile as she looks at him. Before he can get up and go to her though she's surrounded by the other women who had testified, all of them crying in relief.

I didn't have it in myself to go with grace

And so the battleships will sink beneath the waves

She sees him about fifty feet in front of her, his back to her as he stands almost perfectly still. She watches him for a moment, his slumped shoulders and overall defeated attitude and for a moment she feels guilty for what she’s put him through in the past three months. Before she can dwell on the feeling for too long Alex is turning towards her, looking over her with that same sad expression he’d been wearing in the courtroom.

There’s a moment where all Jo and Alex do is stare at each other before she finds herself rushing forward and launching herself into his embrace. His arms are holding her tightly, refusing to let go even as she begins to cry into his chest.

This moment, the feeling of being in Alex’s arms again, is all Jo has wanted since she’d left Seattle.

You had to kill me, but it killed you just the same

“Alex, I’m so-”

“Stop, you don't need to apologize to me,” Alex pulls back from Jo, one hand coming to cup her cheek. “I get it, I understand where you’re coming from. I know why you ran so don’t ever think of apologizing to me. I’m just glad that you’re safe.”

A fresh round of tears springs to Jo’s eyes as she looks up at Alex, “I don’t deserve you. I’ve put you through so much.” Alex blinks down at Jo, not believing what he’s hearing. Their relationship had never been one sided, they’d both supported each through tough situations and had come out stronger at the end. In his eyes this was nothing more than another speed bump.

“I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t want you back Jo. I love you and all of this? None of it changes how I feel about you,” Alex leans down and presses a gentle kiss to Jo’s lips. “I love you and I’m glad you’re back in my arms.”

And you're cursing my name, wishing I stayed

“Hey! I just heard the verdict!”

Jo turns at the sound of Link’s voice, a wide smile spreading across her face as her best friend comes into view. It’s not so much the blonde man’s presence that makes her grin as it is the infant in his arms. Isla is wide eyed as she looks at Jo, the three month old blinking up at her mother with a sense of wonder.

“Hi baby girl, I have someone who’s very excited to see you,” Jo eagerly takes her daughter from Link before turning and looking at Alex. “Isla say hi to daddy, he missed you sooo much.”

The look on Alex’s face as he takes Isla from Jo’s arms is priceless, tears welling in his eyes as he lets out a watery laugh. The little girl snuggles comfortably into his arms, as if she had done it a hundred times before and Jo can’t help her own tears as they leak onto her cheeks.

“You three get together, I think this moment needs to be remembered.” Alex and Jo both heed Link’s instruction and wipe their tears away to boast wide grins. The photo of the three of them squeezed together after a grueling ordeal graces their family mantle for years to come. Even when there are dozens of other family photos, pictures from Alex and Jo’s wedding, and the birth of their second daughter, the photo of Jo, Alex, and Isla standing in front of the courthouse in Boston remains the centerpiece of their living room as a reminder of the sacrifices they all made to keep their family together.

Look at how my tears ricochet

[kassies-take]

Angels to Devils

Summary: A possible assassination attempt success.

A/n: My headcanon Supercorp family. With the twins Lucas and Liam, and you the oc Lauren. Sorry in advance

Warning: Blood, Heavy Injuries, ANGST

Supercorp, Kara Danvers x Reader, Lena Luthor x Reader

Word Count: 2136

Lena usually loved waking up to mornings, Kara by her side and the world so still and quiet that nothing can ruin it. The past few days have been rough. It was another reminder that Lena had something someone else couldn’t have. Another day.

Lena’s eyes filled with tears, her stream of tears flowed into her ear and soaked the pillow. Kara wasn’t awake but Lena held onto her like she was a lifeline. Kara stirred and was immediately awoken to hug her wife.

The casts she wore restricted her movements. Kara was careful to not hurt Lena.

“It’s today isn’t it.” Lena nodded as Kara fought her tears.

You didn’t have a normal childhood, anyone with a Luthor and a Super as parents wasn’t normal. Although it wasn’t normal you knew you were loved.

You were every bit like Lena whereas Liam and Lucas were every bit like Kara. It never really bothered you that you didn’t have powers because without their powers you can easily defeat them in hand-to-hand combat.

To say Lena was proud is an understatement, she was on the sidelines raising her fists, and screaming “Go get Em’ baby!” While Lucas, Liam and Kara flushed red.

It was midsummer before your first quarter at M.I.T , you were partaking in Lena’s work days. Paperwork, meetings and your favorite lab times.

“Ren, I need you to raise the levels to 80%.” Lena watched with a tablet in her hands.

“It is actually on full power already.” You smiled.

Lena faced you before moving her head towards her tablet. “Normally I would lecture you on testing protocols but it works!” Lena placed her tablet down and squeezed you in a hug. “We have successfully made a new renewable and efficient energy source.”

“We also very much stole technology from Argo,” you laughed.

“Don’t ruin the moment.” Lena chuckled, moved back and held your head in between her hands. “My little scientist, you will do great things in the future.” Lena kissed your forehead.

“I think I’d have to start with preventing grey hair without dyes.” You joked.

Lena glared. “Okay smarty pants. You can write the report.”

You groaned as Lena smirked. “Do I have to?”

“This is only practice for the future sweetheart. Plus I have to make sure all the Pauls don’t pull out of any mergers.”

“Ugh those skeezebag lawyers, sometimes I wish I had heat vision.” Your hand shook as if you were preventing yourself from choking someone.

“Careful there,” Lena raised an eyebrow “you sound like a Luthor.”

You grabbed the tablet out of your mother’s hands and pulled the stool in front of the computers. “I hate to burst your bubble but I’m a Luthor and a Super, if you have a problem with that the door is behind you.” You replayed with a teasing tone.

“Okay I really have to go deal with Paul now, behave.” Lena sighed.

“C’mon mama I’m not Lucas.” You began to type several results into the computer.

“Good thing your brother didn’t hear that.” Lena hugged you before heading towards the door. “I’ll see you later. Love you.”

“Love you too mama, more than I love Jeju.” Lena’s heart melted. That was something she was going to brag to Kara about.

Lena sat in the conference room, calm and collected when she really wanted to rip her hair out. She could tell that the other females in the room were feeling the same. The CEO was glad that Sam spoke up about wasting time and had ended the meeting with the final merge successful. 

Sam and Lena walked out of the conference room towards the elevator. When the door dinged opened they were met with a smile and an armful of Lena’s things.

“Hi baby, did you finish the report?” Lena hugged you and grabbed her purse. 

“I got bored,” You shrugged “And Aunt Sam said you were close to ripping out hair that wasn’t grey.” 

“So you texted my daughter?” Lena raised her eyebrows at Sam. 

“For someone who is a genius you’re missing out on the fact that your daughter just said I contacted her.” 

“She texted the Spoiled group chat.” Lena gave a questioning glance at the group name. 

“The group chat with Aunt Sam and the rest of the Superfriend’s Legacies.” 

“I’m the cool Aunt,” Sam smirked. “But now go have fun with the rest of your day off, promise you’ll tell great stories?” Sam hugged you. “And keep your mom away from work, this was really meant to be her day off.” 

“Of course! Bye Aunt Sam!” You waved as she left the elevator. “Do I get to drive home?” 

“Absolutely not!”

“So I get to help in the lab, but I can’t drive home.” You reasoned as you both walked to the underground garage. “I get to pick the music then?” 

You raced towards the passenger seat. You closed the door behind you and locked it immediately. Lena pulled on the door handle and pressed on the keys to unlock the car. You once again locked the car which earned the famous Luthor eyebrow raise.

Lena entered the car as you laughed at her. You knew she wouldn’t be able to keep the silent treatment for much longer.

“I’m sorry, it’s fun to mess with you and Jeju. I’ll make it up to you by playing your old music.” You said as you placed your phone on a magnetic Bluetooth connector and played an *NSYNC song.

“*NSYNC is not old!” Lena drove out of the underground packing.

“Mama, you’re 51. NSYNC is 49 years old. Half a century! It’s old.”

“I’m gonna pretend like you didn’t say that!” Lena said as she raised the volume and belted out the lyrics.

It doesn't matter,

'bout the car I drive or the ice around my neck

All that matters,

Is that you recognize that it’s just about respect (oh)

“It’s all about respect mama,” you teased.

“It better be, I’m a Luthor.” You both laughed.

The car came to a stop at the intersection on Main Street and Cordova. Lena drummed on the steering wheel and sung the chorus. You grabbed a water bottle and held it as a mic.

“Do you ever wonder why, this music gets you high?” The two sang.

The car jolted forward with a loud crash. You groaned at the burn at your neck. A sharp hiss rendered quiet with screeching tires and a horn.

A huge blow hit the car. Suddenly the car tilted towards the ground. An immense weight thrown onto you, with glass sprinkling down. Yours and Lena’s heads whipped side to side as the car flipped several times.

Shallow breaths threatened the immense silence that floated through the street.

~Lena’s POV~

A warm liquid bounced off my cheek. The cold cement acted as my bed. I didn’t have to look to know my left leg and left arm broke. I looked around trying to register what had happened.

My heart threatened to jump out of my chest, as I witnessed my daughter’s soft hand stained red and dangled limply above me. She was suspended above me, a bone or two protruded out of her side. The only thing that stopped her from falling was the seatbelt.

“Lauren baby,” My own voice unrecognizable and unsteady.

I turned to the watch on my left arm, there it sat shattered. I reached towards Lauren’s bloody hand that had her super watch. I flipped open the watch, relieved when her pulse thumped faintly.

A soft thud landed in front of the windshield. I knew it was Kara and J’onn.

“Lena! Lauren!” I heard my wife call.

The car lifted and more of Lauren’s blood flowed onto the seat, compartment and my clothes.

“Wait no no no! The car is applying pressure to one of Lauren’s wounds.”

“I can phase in, apply pressure and get her out. Where are her injuries?”

There was a moment of silence before Kara answered. “Two of her ribs are broken, her right forearm fractured, lower back spinal injury, her other arm is dislocated, broken ankle, t-the seatbelt cut her stomach.”

“I’ll get her to the D.E.O.”

J’onn glowed red and flew through the car. The Martian lifted my daughter like a feather and vanished through the top.

The car flipped up right and I could only groan in response.

“I’ve got you. I’ve got you.” Kara carried me delicately.

~3rd POV~

Supercorp landed on the D.E.O balcony. Kara guided Lena into the MedBay. However they were met with teary eyed Superfriends. Alex had tears pooled in her eyes, Nia sobbed, as J’onn stared into space. Brainy was left to share the bad news.

“You may want to sit down for this.” Brainy waited for Kara and Lena. “Lauren’s injures were very...severe, she also had internal injuries. She didn’t make it.”

Lena froze, she pushed off the bed. “No, no she can’t, she can’t be dead! Where is she?” She stepped with her broken leg and collapsed into Kara’s arm.

“Mrs. Luthor-Danvers we need to tend to your wound.” Dr. Hamilton said from the door.

“You will not! Not until I see my daughter!”

“Bring her a wheelchair,” Alex ordered.

In the D.E.O morgue, a few morticians cleaned Lauren’s body. Two stitched up her body as one cleaned the blood off the youngest Luthor-Danvers’ skin.

“Give Lena and Supergirl space.” The three morticians stepped out of the room.

Lena was wheeled onto one side and Kara stood on the other. Lauren was still warm. Kara held onto her daughter’s hand. She didn’t realize how deafening it was to not hear your heart.

The two parents sobbed. Lena caressed her daughter’s cheek. “I am, I am so sorry baby. You... you had so much more to look forward to. Jeju and I will always love you. Always.” Lena whispered and kissed your forehead. “Always.” Tears rolled down Lena’s cheeks.

Dr. Hamilton rolled Lena into the operating room.

“Little one,” Kara sobbed. She remained there until Lucas and Liam walked through the doors.

The twins were off on a college baseball retreat, and wore their red sun braclets. They received a call from Alex and had to realistically take a 2 hour plane ride back.

“Jeju,” The two boys whispered and hugged Kara. “Is mom okay?”

“She’s okay.”

“Kara, Lena is in recovery.” Alex said from the door. Kara nodded and headed back towards the MedBay.

“Lauren,” Liam whispered. “How I wish you were just sleeping.”

“I love you, Ren. Thank you for pushing me to the best I could be. Wouldn’t have been able to be Lucas Luthor-Danvers without you.” Lucas cried.

“Don’t worry about us okay, we will be okay.” Liam wiped his tears away.

Everyone of Kara’s friends and family sat on top of a hill that looked over National City. The Legends, Team Flash, Team Arrow, The Bat Family, Lucy Lane, Kal-El’s family, Sam and Ruby, Superfriends and your cousins were there.

Eliza flew in from Midvale a couple of days ago, Alura landed on Earth an hour ago and even Lillian was there in honor of her granddaughter.

Lillian was furious that your death was cause by an assassination attempt on Lena. She had pulled up security cameras and tracked the man who purposefully hit Lena’s car.

Lauren laid in a red pod and floated next to her designated tree. Everyone was given a chance to say something about you.

Kara talked about hearing your first heartbeat, Lena on helping her in the labs. Liam about how you were able to keep him and Lucas out of trouble. Lucas focused on the last midnight talk the two of you shared. Alex shared how you were a fighter.

J’onn shared your last thoughts, he shifted into your form. “I’m scared to leave this world not because I am afraid of death but because I’m scared of leaving everyone I love behind. I don’t regret anything because of everyone I had in my life.” Other cute moments were shared before Kara started The Prayer for the Dead.

She moved her hand over the pod. The House of El symbol glowed and the glass of the pod became transparent. Kara took a deep and shaky breath.

“You have been the sun of our lives. Our prayers will be the sun that lights your journey home.” Kara released another shaky breath and looked towards the horizon. “We will remember you in every dawn and await the night we join you in the sky.” Kara’s eye glistened. “Rao’s will be done.” She finished in Kryptonian.

Alura pushed the pod and it slowly flew higher and further into the horizon. Lena pinned a sign on a tree that read:

Lauren Luthor-Danvers

2027 - 2044

[marjansmarwani]

drop what I’m doing and sit beside you

6.4k || ao3

The past few months have been a lot, and Judd is feeling the strain. Ever since the accident, he has devoted every spare moment to making sure Grace was okay until she finally insists that he take some time to himself. So he decides to head to the cabin he used to visit with his old crew, TK in tow and Carlos staying behind with Grace.

But what starts out as a calm and relaxing weekend takes an abrupt turn and Judd is left hurt and TK is left trying to figure out the best way to save them both. ------ Day 2 of @911lonestarweek: "Please, stay awake" + “I’m right here, I’m not leaving, okay.”+ Cauterizing a wound for @badthingshappenbingo

Judd and Grace deserve some love so here is a take on “I’m right here, I’m not leaving, okay” prompt requested by @immortalstrand ages ago. She asked for Judd and TK being brothers, so I also managed to squeeze in some Tarlos and some cauterization, requested by Max for bthb. 

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The last few weeks had been a lot, to say the least. 

They had careened directly from a pandemic (that was still going on) to a damn volcano straight into a forest fire. They had lost one of their own and hadn’t had a moment to catch their breaths, let alone properly grieve. The universe didn’t seem too keen on them having a moment to process. 

From there it had been smaller things for a while: a minefield, TK switching to medical, whatever it was that was going on with Owen and Gwyn. Small interruptions to their everyday that were just enough to upset their equilibrium and set things off balance. But they were manageable; small stumbling points in their forward momentum. 

Until they weren’t. Until the molehills became mountains and Judd was reminded again what it was like to not be able to breathe in the face of fear. The feeling of the breath being stolen from his lungs was not a new one, but one that he hated. 

But he had hated what he was hearing even more: the paramedic team was missing. Nancy; who was his sole link to the time before, to his old life with his brothers that were no longer here. TK; his cocky, annoying, and big-hearted little brother. Tommy; his friend, a person he relied on and whom he owed the world to for introducing him to Grace and bringing him the greatest happiness he had ever known. They were missing and probably in danger and Judd couldn’t do a damn thing about it. 

But then they were found, and he could breathe again; if a little tensely. Because they were all alive but TK was hurt and it could have been so much worse but it hadn’t and he had to keep reminding himself of that. They were okay, and everything was fine. 

Until the rain and the blaring of a horn and the sensation of falling before the staggering crash of hitting the water and the desperate fear that was so much more real than any of the rest of it because it was Grace this time and nothing he had ever faced could be as bad as that. 

But slowly, they healed. The moment Grace opened her eyes again and smiled at him Judd swore rivaled their wedding day as the happiest moment of his life. As long as Grace was okay everything would be fine. And it was. It wasn’t easy, but it was okay. They were okay. His injuries had been minor, comparatively speaking, but Grace’s had been much more dire, and much more lingering. They had impacted their very way of life and every day was a bit of a struggle, but it was worth it. Any moment he got to spend with his wife safe and whole beside him was worth it, no matter how difficult. 

But eventually, things became something close to normal and Grace was tired of him hovering over her in every spare moment. 

“You need to do something, my love,” she had told him. “Take some time, go somewhere.” When he had protested she had simply shaken her head. “I love you, Judd,” she said evenly, “but if you don’t let me be for a few days, I’m going to lose my mind.” 

And so, in the face of his wife’s unwavering gaze, a plan had formed: there was an old cabin, about an hour outside the city. Judd and some of his teammates used to take a trip there at least once a year, often more. It had been almost two now since Judd had last been there, but he figured now was as good a time as any. He floated the idea to his new team, in the interest of keeping the tradition alive. Paul and Nancy turned him down outright, though they were touched. Marjan had a roller derby bout that weekend and Tommy didn’t want to waste any of her time with her girls. Which left him with TK and Mateo, who both eagerly agreed. 

Judd couldn’t hide his surprise at TK’s ready acceptance, making some comment about the city boy camping which caused the younger man to roll his eyes. 

“You do realize that you can leave New York, right?” he asked sarcastically. “There’s a big state outside the city and plenty of places to camp. My dad and I used to go whenever we had the time when I was growing up. It’s been years, but I doubt camping has changed all that much.” 

Judd didn’t have much to say to that so he settled for mussing up TK’s hair, causing him to give an indignant squawk and Nancy to laugh. The pieces began to fall into place the closer they got to the actual date. Judd had confessed his hesitation of leaving Grace completely alone to TK only to have Carlos offer to stay at the house with her when he wasn’t working. More surprising than the offer was Grace’s ready acceptance of it. 

“You think you boys are going to have fun,” she teased Judd, “but I’d wager that Carlos and I can give you a run for your money.” 

Which didn’t exactly instill much confidence, but if there were two people Judd Ryder trusted in the world, his wife and Carlos Reyes certainly made the list. So Judd thanked Carlos (and TK, who he was certain had something to do with it) and moved forward. 

The day of their excursion dawned bright and clear and found TK and Judd securing the last of their gear in the bed of Judd’s truck. Mateo had come down with a stomach bug the day before, leaving them with just a duo for the weekend. 

“I don’t know,” TK quipped as he deftly caught the bag Judd tossed him before setting it down in the truck bed he was standing in, “think we’ll be able to handle it?” 

“Handle what?”

“So much time together, just the two of us.” 

Judd shrugged, “I don’t see why not. Besides, you get annoying enough there are plenty of places to dump a body.” TK rolled his eyes as he climbed down from the truck but Judd continued contemplatively, “Could easily make it look like an accident too.” 

“I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear that,” a new voice deadpanned and Judd turned to see Carlos and Grace approaching. The young cop raised an eyebrow and TK smiled at him as he stepped into his boyfriend’s space. 

“Or otherwise you’d have to arrest him on suspicion of murder?” he teased lightly. 

“I don’t know about that,” Carlos countered as he snaked his arms around TK’s waist, “you know what they say: no body, no crime.” 

“So you have to wait until after he murders me? Wow.” 

“Sorry babe, I don’t make the laws.” 

“Rude,” TK exclaimed, but leaned in for a kiss anyway. 

Judd rolled his eyes at them, only to get a swat from his wife. “Don’t pretend that we were any better at that point in our relationship Judd.” 

Judd grinned and leaned down, pressing a soft kiss to the top of her head. “Who says we’re any better now?” he asked, causing Grace to giggle and half-heartedly swat at him again. He leaned even further to pull her into a lingering kiss. When they pulled apart he studied her for a long moment. He wasn’t ready to leave her just yet. What if…

But his spiral was interrupted by her firmly shaking her head. Judd wasn’t surprised that she knew where his thoughts were going: she knew every inch of him and it was all hers. 

“Judson Ryder I will be fine. Which is more than I can say for you if you don’t take some time for yourself. You need to recharge, my love. Go and take that city boy and show him how to rough it. I’ll be here when you get back.” 

Judd swallowed and nodded, forcing a smile in the weight of his wife’s expectant gaze. He leaned down to give her one more kiss before straightening and throwing a glance at TK who was still talking closely with Carlos, still wrapped in his embrace: “You ready to get this show on the road, lover boy?” 

TK leaned in for one last fleeting kiss before turning to face Judd with a smirk: “Ready when you are, Cowboy Judd.” 

Carlos shook his head and came to stand beside Grace, clapping a hand on Judd’s shoulder as he passed him. “Try not to kill him, if you can,” he requested lightly. “I do kind of like him, after all.” 

“I make no promises, Reyes,” Judd shot back. He went to step away, but paused. He looked back at Carlos, needing to say how much he appreciated what the younger man was doing but Carlos shook his head before he even had a chance to form the words. 

“I’m happy to do it, Judd. Besides, I know you’d do the same for me.” 

Carlos flicked his eyes to where TK was checking the bungee cords over the truck bed and Judd nodded. Of course he would, that’s what family does, after all. 

“Alright kid, let’s hit the road,” he said instead, turning back to the truck and TK. “We’re burning daylight.” 

TK sent a wave in the direction of Grace and Carlos before climbing into the passenger side of the truck. Judd walked around to the front and pulled open his door, turning to give Grace one last look. She sent him a warm and reassuring smile and he forced himself to take a calming breath. She would be fine, it would be okay. 

With that he shot her a grin before climbing in himself and pulling away, already counting down the seconds until he would be back by his wife’s side. 

---------

Grace had been right. 

Which shouldn’t surprise him after all these years, but the fact remained. 

It turned out that this had been exactly what he needed. To get away for a while, to spend some time in the fresh and open air. He had been worried, before they came, that being back here would bring up old memories of the family he had lost. And it did, but not in a bad way. He had been struck by it the moment they had arrived, when he had opened the door to the familiar room that even now seemed to echo with the sounds of their laughter. He had paused, overwhelmed by the force of it all when he felt a cautious hand on his arm. He glanced over to see TK looking at him carefully. 

“You okay?” he asked and Judd took a deep breath before nodding. 

“Yeah,” he said lowly, “it’s just been a while, you know? And the last time I was here...things were different.” 

He didn’t expand but he could tell by the look on TK’s face that the young paramedic knew exactly what he wasn’t saying. He nodded, glancing around the room as if he too could see the ghosts. “What to tell me about them?” 

He looked at TK sharply, surprised but the other man just shrugged, “I think I’d like to know more about them, if you feel like talking about it.” 

Judd looked away from his friend to study the empty room again. They had come here so often, every single inch of the space held a memory. More than he could ever forget and, as had happened more and more often with time, he realized he didn’t want to. “You see that part of the ceiling over there that looks cleaner than the rest?”

TK followed his pointed finger and nodded when he saw the ceiling tile that stood out as starkly more white than the others. 

“Let’s just say you are not the worst firehouse cook I have ever seen, kid.” 

TK glances up at the ceiling and then back at Judd, eyebrow raised. “Do I want to know?” 

“Why don’t I tell you and we’ll find out.” 

-----------

The rest of the day passed in a similar way, the two men chatting as they set up camp and Judd filling the space with whatever story of his old crew’s antics he thought of at that moment. 

“I think I would have liked them,” TK noted once he caught his breath after a particularly entertaining story about a wild turkey and a very startled probie who did not know they could fly. 

“Oh, you would have,” Judd agreed. “And you would’ve all gotten along like a house on fire. It’s Austin I’d be worried about.”  

TK rolled his eyes and turned his attention back to their surroundings. They were on their way to a trail Judd said they used to frequent that apparently had some great views from the peak. Judd was in his element now, sharing stories and showing TK around the patch of forest he knew so well. There was apparently fishing in the creek on the agenda for tomorrow and while TK would be lying if he said he was enthused by the idea, he was happy to see Judd happy. The past month or so since the accident had been hard on them all, but none more than Judd. Seeing him standing a little straighter and smiling a little wide brought TK a relief he hadn’t been expecting. 

He was so lost in his thoughts he almost didn’t notice the ground give way underneath his foot until it was too late. He flailed, windmilling his arms in a desperate attempt to catch his balance but it proved to be unnecessary when Judd reached out and caught him, steadying him and pulling him back to even ground. 

“Easy there,” he said firmly, “you good?” 

“Yeah,” TK responded after his heart rate returned to normal. “Yeah, I’m good. I don’t know what happened though. One minute I was walking and then...”

“And then you weren’t,” Judd finished helpfully, looking past TK to the spot he had nearly fallen from. TK followed his gaze to see that the edge of the trail they had been walking had crumbled under his feet. 

“Looks like erosion,” Judd observed with a frown. “I knew they’ve had a lot of rain up this way, but I didn’t realize it would have been enough to affect the land.” 

“That’s global warming for you,” TK retorted wryly, stepping closer to the middle of the trail, “and I don’t think it’s going to be any better as we get further.” 

Judd nodded, “Yeah, we should probably turn back.” 

But even as he said it TK could see the disappointment playing out on his face. This was important to Judd, and this weekend was all about giving him a break from all of the shit he had been dealing with for the past month. If that meant walking a slightly less than stable trail for a few hours, TK could manage that. 

“What?” he teased, stepping around Judd and heading further up the trail, “You don’t think we can handle it? There’s no reason we can’t, we just have to watch our steps.”  

Judd looked as if he were debating for a moment before TK rolled his eyes at him, “C’mon Judd, we’re here. We might as well take the chance while we can. Besides now that we know, we’ll just have to be more careful.” 

Finally, Judd shook his head. “Alright kid, but if you get yourself injured I am not covering for you with your man.” 

TK shook his head but laughed as he turned around. “Then we better not get injured because I’m not covering for you from Grace either. Besides,” he added, “I didn’t bring the full first aid kit so mortal injuries are not allowed.” 

He quickened his pace as he moved further down the trail, causing Judd to curse under his breath as he sped up to catch up with him. He slowed after a minute and the two men continued down the trail in companionable silence. TK may be a city person, born and raised, but there was something comforting about the silence of nature. It offered a silence he had spent years and many pills trying to find in his own head. The only problem with it was that eventually, it ended and he was always right back where he started. 

But this was about Judd and so TK turned to glance at him. He seemed lost in thought. “What’s on your mind?” he asked, startling the other man out of his reverie. He had an almost guilty look on his face and TK rolled his eyes, “Please don’t tell me you were worrying about Grace?” 

The way Judd turned away, avoiding TK’s gaze told him everything he needed to know. 

“Judd,” he sighed, “she’s fine. She’s in no danger and is perfectly capable of taking care of herself. Besides,” he added after a glance at his watch, “Carlos’s shift will be over in an hour and then he’ll be over there and I’m sure they’ll be having a great time making pasta and gossiping over wine.” 

Judd did at least snort at that, causing TK to relax a little. “I know you’re worried,” he continued, voice softer, “and honestly I can’t say I blame you. I don’t think I would be much better if it were Carlos in her place and we had gone through what you have. But you trust her, right?” 

“More than anyone,” Judd replied, without a moment’s hesitation.

“Then trust her,” TK implored. “She told you she would be fine and so she will. And if she’s not she has people to rely on. She’s not alone in this, neither of you are.” 

There was silence between them for several moments and as it stretched on TK began to worry that he had overstepped. He was about to offer an apology and resign himself to a hike filled with awkward silence when Judd finally spoke. 

“That’s actually pretty wise,” he mused, “who would have thought you had that in you?” 

TK rolled his eyes as Judd laughed. “See if I ever give you advice again,” he gripped, staggering as Judd clapped him on the shoulder. 

“I appreciate it kid, really,” he assured him. “And you might just be right.” 

“Only maybe?”

“Well I can’t have you getting a big head, can I?” 

TK rolled his eyes and decided to change the subject, “How much further to this lookout point?” 

“What, you getting tired on me?” 

“No, but it will be getting dark in just over an hour and while an eroding trail in daylight is doable, an eroding trail in the dark is something else entirely.” 

Judd sobered at the reminder, “It’s not too much further, 10 minutes tops. Besides, it’s worth it. Most beautiful view you’ve ever seen. Chuck actually proposed to his wife out here.” 

“Are you planning on proposing to me, Judd? Because I’m flattered but I think your wife and my boyfriend might have something to say about that.” 

Judd shook his head, “Can’t even show you the wonders of nature without you making it weird. What am I going to do with you kid?” 

TK simply laughed and Judd rolled his eyes. They continued forward, reaching an opening in the trees a few minutes later, as promised. TK could feel Judd’s eyes on him as they stepped forward and he meant to make a quip about it, but the sight that sprawled out before them stole the words from him. Open fields spread out as far as they could see, bright spots of blue dotting them and a river winding lazily through. 

“This is the best time to come out here,” Judd was saying. “The bluebonnets are fully in bloom.” 

“It’s gorgeous,” TK agreed. “Why didn’t you bring Grace out here to propose?” 

Judd shrugged, “That was the plan, actually. I figured she deserved the best. But it didn’t quite work out that way.” 

TK studied him for a moment. “You blurted it out without thinking, didn’t you?” 

Judd looked startled for a moment but when TK raised an eyebrow he chuckled ruefully, “Yeah I did. Don’t give me that look,” he protested defensively, “like you’re going to do any better when the time comes for you and Reyes.” 

TK’s laughter petered off and he shook his head. “You’re probably right,” he admitted. “Besides, take it from someone with unfortunate experience in this matter: those overly planned and dramatic proposals aren’t all they’re cracked up to be.” 

Judd sobered at the change in TK’s tone, and though he didn’t push TK was sure he had connected the dots in his mind. 

“Yeah well,” he said instead, “if it’s the right person the ‘how’ doesn’t matter.”  

TK smiled at him before turning his gaze back to the amazing view before them. Judd kept talking beside him, “We used to come out here, from time to time. My old crew and me,” he clarified and TK nodded.

“A bunch of macho firefighters admiring the pretty flowers?” he teased lightly but Judd shook his head. 

“It was just kind of peaceful, you know? We’d come out here and somehow find a way to talk about the serious things. It was nice. It was…” 

He trailed off but TK continued for him, understanding where he was going with it, “A safe place.”

“Yeah,” Judd agreed softly, stepping closer to the edge. “It was.” 

TK smiled sadly at his back, staying quiet as Judd took a moment. He couldn’t begin to imagine what he was thinking about or how much he had suffered. TK had never been as close with any crew before this one, and he couldn’t imagine losing any of them, let alone all of them. He couldn’t imagine what that would feel like. So he was content to offer silent support and to let Judd do whatever it was that he needed to do. 

Or he was, until Judd took another absent minded step forward and TK heard the tell-tale sound of earth crumbling. 

“Judd!” he called out, lunging forward to grab for the other man, just managing to latch on to his arm before the rest of the ground crumbled around him. 

He wasn’t fast enough to prevent it though. All he could do was follow as gravity did its work, pulling Judd over the edge of the overlook, pulling TK with him. 

They tumbled for what felt like ages, each moment a blur of motion and pain. When they finally came to a rest TK took a moment to remember how to breathe, to reacquaint himself with his body once more. And in the next moment he turned, looking for Judd. 

He found him only a few feet from him. He was sprawled and not moving and for a moment, TK forgot how to breathe all over again.

“Judd!” he called as he pushed himself up, collapsing with a sharp gasp as pain shot through his right wrist. He stopped for a moment to examine it; carefully feeling the joint for any signs of a break. He didn’t find any and tried to pull himself up again, more carefully this time. He made his way to Judd’s side, surveying him the best he could without moving him unnecessarily, looking him over for any signs of major injury. He didn’t see any so he gently turned him over, biting his lip against the pain that shot through his wrist at the motion.

“Judd,” he tried again, “are you with me?” 

“Yeah,” came the other man’s response and TK almost collapsed in relief.

“Can you tell me what happened?” he asked, beginning to examine him more closely. 

“Are you going all paramedic on me kid?” he asked drily and TK narrowed his eyes. 

“Humor me.”

Judd sighed, “We were hiking and I stepped too close to the edge of a trail we knew was unstable. I screwed up.” 

“We’re all allowed,” TK reminded him. “God knows I’ve done my fair share. What’s important is that you’re okay. Is there anything that hurts?” 

“What about you? You okay?” 

“I’m fine. Really,” he insisted at Judd’s less than convinced look. “I’m going to be very bruised and I think I sprained a wrist but it’s my right and since I’m left handed, I’ll live. I’m more worried about you at the moment.”

“Don’t need to be,” Judd said weakly, “I’m fine. Help me up and we’ll get out of here.” 

But TK had continued his examination and determined that while Judd Ryder was a lot of things, one of them (at the moment) was a liar. There was a puncture wound on his thigh, and it was bleeding heavily. TK swore and reached around for his backpack, knowing that while he had not brought the full first aid kit he had at least grabbed some bandages. 

It was a moment later that he realized he no longer had it. It must have been lost somewhere along their fall. He glanced back up to see that they had fallen much further than he had thought; nearly 40 feet of steep, overgrown hillside was stretched out between them and the overlook. He swore again. 

“What’s wrong?” Judd asked him. 

TK took a steadying breath before he looked back down at Judd. “What’s wrong is that you have a wound that is bleeding pretty heavily and that I lost my backpack with all our medical supplies and gear somewhere in the fall. I can try to make a pressure bandage maybe, but I don’t know if it’ll be enough to stop it.” 

“And we need to get out of here,” Judd added, “because it’ll be dark soon and the local wildlife might not take too kindly to our being here.” 

“That too,” TK agreed, already pulling off his hoodie and balling it up to compress against the wound. “Overall, this is less than ideal.” 

Judd nodded and reached into his pocket for his phone and turned it to TK after a moment, revealing a picture of him and Grace, and no bars. “Well we’re on our own for getting out,” he told TK, “no service.” 

TK cursed again. Looking back down at the hoodie in his hand, the gray material rapidly being consumed by the bright red of blood. It was bleeding too much. 

“You should go get help.” 

TK looked sharply up at Judd, who seemed to think what he was saying made sense. “No,” TK said incredulously. “I’m not going anywhere. I’m right here, I’m not leaving, okay.”

“You should,” Judd countered, “it might be our best shot.” 

“How exactly do you think you are going to do against that wildlife you mentioned?” TK asked him with a raised eyebrow. “I’m not going anywhere.” 

They lapsed into silence, after that, both their minds spinning with possibilities and solutions. It was Judd that eventually broke the silence.

“What if you cauterized it?” 

TK looked up at him incredulously, “I’m sorry, what?”

“To stop the bleeding. We don’t really have enough equipment with us for you to properly bandage it and it’s bleeding an awful lot. Cauterizing it might be the best way to stop the bleeding with what we have.” 

TK shook his head, “It’s not that simple Judd. Yes, it would stop the bleeding, but it would only stop it from coming through the skin. I have no way of knowing what is torn internally, and cauterizing the outside won’t do anything for that. You could just end up with massive internal bleeding instead, not to mention the risk of infection. And I think you are ignoring the fact that cauterizing it would literally mean I would be melting your skin back together.” 

“What’s another burn scar?” Judd said with a shrug and TK frowned at him. 

“At some point we’re going to have to talk about how casually you said that,” he muttered, “but there are bigger matters at hand right now.” 

TK could feel Judd watching him but his mind was turning; pros and cons and possible courses of action flying through his head. He bit his lip as he looked back down at the compress he was still clutching tightly to the wound, and swallowed. It wasn’t the worst idea in the world, but it also wasn’t a great one. It was a last resort type of idea for sure, and he wasn’t quite sure they were there just yet. 

But they were pretty close.  

“Listen, kid,” Judd said, interrupting his thoughts, “you need to do what you think is best. I trust you and I know you won’t let me down.” 

“It could go wrong though,” TK admitted quietly, “it could make things worse.” 

“Or you could not do it and we could be trapped here, since you refuse to leave for help.” 

TK bit at his lip as he considered. He hated the idea. Not only was it not guaranteed to work, it would also be incredibly painful. But Judd was right; it might be their only shot. 

“We’d need something that could get hot enough,” he finally said, “and something to heat it with.” 

“There’s a hunting knife strapped to my belt and a lighter in my right pocket.” 

TK took a deep breath and nodded, “Okay, but this is going to hurt; a lot.” 

“I trust you.” 

And he did. TK had always known that, but the way he was looking at him now as he bled out on the forest floor made it even more apparent. He took another wavering breath before he nodded, “Then let’s do this.” 

He took the knife from Judd and reached into the indicated pocket for the lighter. He flicked it on and held it under the knife, running the flame back and forth across it, making sure to evenly heat it. When he could feel the heat emanating from it he pulled the hoodie off the wound and did his best to clean it before he met Judd’s eyes.

“Ready?” he asked. 

“As I’ll ever be,” he responded.  

TK nodded again and swallowed, looking back down at the offending wound. He took a deep breath and pressed the hot knife against the puncture, making sure to raise and lower it in short bursts to prevent from killing the healthy tissue surrounding the wound. He could hear Judd’s cries of pain and apologized over and over again, for all the good it did. Then finally, it was done and he tossed the knife down onto the ground beside them as he leaned forward to examine the wound. It wasn’t bleeding anymore, at least, which meant he at least hadn’t tortured his friend for nothing. 

He pulled his eyes off of the wound in search of Judd’s face, feeling fear course through him as he saw his eyes closed. 

“Hey,” he instructed, “I need you to open your eyes, Judd. I need you awake.”

He tapped on the other man’s face and eventually, his eyes blinked open. 

“That’s it,” he said soothingly. “That’s better. I know it hurts but I need you to keep those eyes open. Please, stay awake.” 

“Can’t leave you out here on your own,” Judd quipped weakly, and TK laughed.

“No, you can’t,” he agreed. He settled down on the ground beside Judd, determined to let him relax a bit before they tried to move at all. 

“We should get moving,” Judd said instead, trying to pull himself up. “The road should be that way, unless my head is truly scrambled. We should be able to find someone passing by, or at least get a signal to call for help maybe.”

“And we will,” TK assured him, “but you can take a second to catch your breath first. That can’t have been fun.” 

“Wouldn’t recommend it,” Judd agreed, “but I’m good.” 

“Well I’m not,” TK countered. “I’m going to need a minute to recover from melting my friend’s skin back together so you can just wait a minute or two if you don’t mind.”

Judd's unimpressed look told TK he knew exactly what he was doing, but he settled back down with a sigh.  

“What do you think Grace and Carlos are going to have to say about this?” he asked, and TK chuckled. 

“Nothing good,” he admitted, “but they’ll both just be glad we’re okay. Pretty sure Grace will have something to say about irony though when you were the one we should have all been worried about, in the end.” 

Judd snorted and they lapsed into silence. They waited for a few more minutes until TK glanced up at the sky and the slowly sinking sun with a sigh, “Guess it’s time,” he said, gingerly pulling himself off the ground and brushing himself off. “We’ll have better luck if we can get to the road before dark. You good to go?” 

“As I’ll ever be,” Judd shrugged and allowed TK to help him up. It was a sign of how badly he was feeling, TK thought, that Judd leaned against him without even a hint of protest, allowing TK to support him. He slid one of Judd’s arms around his shoulder. 

“Lead the way, Cowboy Judd,” he instructed once they were settled, “I have no idea where we’re going.” 

“East,” Judd told him, nodding in the direction away from the setting sun. “The road is East from here.” 

“East it is,” he agreed as he took a tentative step forward, allowing Judd a moment to get his feet under him. “Then we just hope it’s rush hour out in the sticks.” 

They made their way to the road, slowly but surely. TK kept stealing glances at Judd, making note of his condition. So far he seemed good. Or as good as could be expected, at least. He was pale and sweating but that was to be expected from exertion and blood loss. Hopefully they would find help soon. TK wasn’t ready to think about what could happen if they didn’t. 

They reached the road without incident and TK could hardly believe his eyes. There were lights in the distance, heading towards them. 

“Judd!” he exclaimed, “there’s a car coming! Come on!”  

Judd followed his gaze and picked up his pace, the sight of the car apparently giving him a second wind. When they reached the side and the car slowed to a stop at the sight of TK’s frantic waves and Judd clinging to him, TK allowed himself a moment to breathe a sigh of relief. It would be okay, they would be fine. 

And that was all he could ask for. 

------------

TK was dozing off in the uncomfortable chair at the side of Judd’s bed when he heard frantic footsteps approaching. He sat up as Carlos and Grace entered the room, both wearing anxious expressions that didn’t ease much at the sight of them. 

TK knew he must look like a wreck - covered in cuts and bruises and his wrist wrapped with an ice pack resting on top of it - but he was at least sitting up (for the most part). Judd on the other hand…

Grace went straight for him, a hand covering her mouth as she took in the sight. 

“He’ll be okay,” TK told her softly, “they did a full exam. They just want him to get some fluids and a transfusion to make up for the blood loss and some antibiotics just in case due to the less than sterile conditions. He’ll be up and on his feet in no time.”

“Probably sooner than he should,” Grace snorted, though her voice was thick. TK looked away, allowing her to have her moment, to Carlos who was studying him from the doorway.

“I’m okay too,” he assured him. “Just some superficial cuts and bruises.” 

“So the ice pack and bandage is just for fun?” he asked with a raised eyebrow.

“It’s only a sprain,” TK retorted. “We’re both going to be fine.” 

“Well one thing’s for sure,” Grace noted as she took one of Judd’s hands in hers, “I would say Carlos and I did have more fun than you. Until we got that phone call, that is.” 

“Hey now, I think me and the kid were doing just fine in the fun department before this all happened, isn’t that right TK?” 

All eyes turned to Judd who had apparently woken up at some point during their conversation and was beaming up at Grace. 

“That’s true,” TK agreed, giving Carlos a fond smile as Judd and Grace looked at each other, “and it’s not like we asked the path to erode. That was definitely not the plan.” 

“I would just like to make pasta without someone I care about ending up in the hospital,” Carlos declared, coming up behind TK to put his hands on his shoulders and leaning down to press a kiss to the top of his head. “But that is apparently too much to ask.” 

TK looked over at Judd and Grace to see what they had to say but they were too wrapped up in each other to even know that they had company in the room. Grace had tears in her eyes as she reached out a hand to put a hand on Judd’s face. “And here you were worried about me,” she reminded him. “That is what I call irony, my love.” 

TK did his best to bite back the laugh that came at that and Judd spared him a glance long enough to roll his eyes before turning his gaze back to his wife. 

“I’m sorry,” he said, “I didn’t want to worry you.” 

“I’m afraid you don’t get a say in that Judd,” Grace argued, “it comes with the territory when you love someone.” 

TK looked up at Carlos to see him smiling down at him. He reached his good hand up and placed it on top of one of the hands on his shoulders, giving it a light squeeze. Soon they would work out the logistics and likely leave Judd and Grace to their own devices, giving them the time they needed to savor the existence of each other. They would likely go home and do the same.  But for now TK was content to sit here; the man he loved beside him and two dear friends nearby and just soak it all in. It had been a long day after a long few months, but they were all safe and whole and they were here together. 

And TK knew now just as surely as he had by the side of the road: couldn’t ask for anything more. 

[childrenofthenightt]

That’s The Way (Chapter 3)

Pairing: Jimmy Page x Reader

Word count: 3.7k

Warning(s): smut/nsfw, cheating, cursing, angst, Y/N being a badass :)

Author’s notes: We’ll be honest...this chapter is a lot to handle 😂 which is amazing since it’s only Chapter 3 of many! We suggest taking a break throughout, because you’re gonna need it 😂 So much happens that your mind may actually explode from the drama. By the way, Jimmy is introduced in the next chapter so yay! As usual, please enjoy, happy reading, and send us messages if you have theories, comments, music recommendations for the playlist, or if you want to be added to the tag list :)

Chapters: 1 | 2

————

Paul took Y/N out to dinner that week, and they had a wonderful time together. It seemed that every conversation they had together brought them closer and closer, and Y/N was in pure bliss. From that point forward, the two became inseparable.

Y/N’s parents, however, were not super pleased that Y/N was seeing Paul, especially because they had warned her about the romantically-unattached musician’s mannerisms and habits not that long ago. They just decided to act like they liked Paul, so he wouldn’t get suspicious or feel bad.

Two members of The Yardbirds in particular (and I’m sure, dear reader, that you know who they are by now) were hit with pangs of jealousy whenever they saw Y/N constantly attached to Paul’s arm. And, to make matters worse, it was under any circumstance imaginable: parties, interviews, photoshoots, meetings, airports, train stations, hotels...the list goes on. Yes, they did spend plenty of time apart, but attraction can make a man think irrationally. Even though they were specifically and strictly told to keep their mouths shut, it was very tempting to just say the truth and end their misery. A part of Chris and Jim felt happy to see her happy, but another, traitorous side of them felt exponentially bad for her. They knew that she was being used by Paul as arm-candy, and they knew that she, of all people, did not deserve that.

But that’s the name of the game, unfortunately.

~~~~~~~~

18 February 1966

The Yardbirds were scheduled to perform on an episode of Ready, Steady, Go! that night, and Y/N decided to go and be a part of the live audience. She felt an obligation to support Paul and the band, since they were all friends (and a boyfriend, of course) now.

Before the show, Jim, Jeff, and Keith were all sitting on the stage, discussing the logistics of the rehearsals that would start soon. Y/N stood in front of the already-prepared stage and chatted with them.

“So what are you guys going to do on our days off next week?” Jeff asked.

“Spend time with my family,” Keith replied, adjusting his sunglasses.

“Not sure yet, haven’t figured it out,” Jim added.

“How ‘bout you, Miss Y/N?” Jeff nodded towards her with a smile. She answered with a soft giggle.

“I’m probably going golfing with my brother and a couple mates.”

“You golf?” Jim asked. She seemed to be getting more and more perfect by the day.

“Mmhmm,” Y/N nodded enthusiastically, “I’m bloody awful at it, but it’s fun, and I can hang out with my brother, so it’s a win-win.”

“You never told us you had siblings,” Keith smirked, tilting to the side and crossing his arms.

“Oh yeah, I have three. There’s Tommy, my older brother; Charlie, my younger brother; and Lillian, my little sister,” Y/N said.

“Wow, full house,” Jeff remarked, “I have a sister, Annetta, who I think you’d get along with quite well. I’ll have to introduce you to her soon.”

“Oh, that’d be great! I’d love to meet another Beck,” Y/N replied playfully. Jeff just laughed and shook his head.

“It’s a shame that I can’t spend time with Paul this week. He said he was busy, but he didn’t explain why,” Y/N sighed, “whatever. It’s probably legitimate, so I don’t mind. We’ve been hanging out too much anyway.” She laughed at the last part.

“He’s probably just going home to his wife,” Jim replied, thoughtlessly.

At that instant, everyone’s eyes widened, eyebrows raised, and lips downturned into a shocked, panicked frown.

“He’s...what?” Y/N asked quietly, sounding like she was about to shatter into a thousand tiny pieces.

Y/N noticed that Keith and Jeff were glaring at Jim, who was clearly embarrassed at what he had revealed. He hid his eyes with his hand.

When Jeff finally found it in him to turn away from Jim, he deeply exhaled. He then reached out his hands to touch Y/N’s shoulders in an attempt to comfort her.

“Look, Y/N, you weren’t supposed to find out this way, and I’m so sorry we didn’t tell you sooner,” Jeff began, “but he is indeed married. I honestly don’t know why he wanted to pursue you, and I warned him against it because of how much we care about you, but he did it anyway.”

Tears streamed down Y/N’s face and her bottom lip started to quiver. “I can’t believe this,” she whispered, “he made it seem like I was the only one…that he was really in love with me...”

Jeff hated seeing his friend cry because of something he could have prevented. But, Y/N was somehow still beautiful when she cried.

“I’m so sorry, Y/N,” Jeff consoled gently, getting off the stage to hug her, “here, let’s take you backstage to calm you down a little.”

Y/N refused Jeff’s kind offer with a shake of the head. Through her blurry, teary-eyed vision, she just plastered on a smile, and wiped the wetness from her eyes.

“Ew,” her voice cracked, “why am I crying? That’s so gross of me, I’m so sorry. I’m definitely making you guys uncomfortable.”

The three musicians’ eyes widened at Y/N’s sudden burst of emotional strength.

“Y/N, you just found out you were Sam’s side chick, and you don’t care?” Jeff inquired, genuinely confused as to what was going on with Y/N’s emotions.

“It’s okay to be sad, love. And utterly fuming with anger. I must admit, this situation wouldn’t be as dire if it were someone else, but it’s you,” Keith added. Jim just sat in silence. He didn’t know what to say. His message destroyed Y/N’s heart and her innocence.

“I am sad, but if this ‘thing’ went on any longer, I’d probably be even more devastated. You saved me from a lot more unnecessary heartbreak, so thank you, Jim,” Y/N said. Her tone sounded completely numb.

“How are you gonna tell Sam?” Keith asked Y/N.

She exhaled deeply. “I don’t know. It wouldn’t be fair of me to lash out on him before being on national television.”

“How can you care about fairness? Don’t you realize what this man has done to you?” Jeff asked, anger interlaced in his voice.

“Yes, Jeff. I do,” Y/N replied stoically, “And I’ll be fine, really. Let’s just forget about it, okay? I’m just lucky to be here, watching you perform. What song are you playing again?” Y/N tried to change the subject, but on the inside she was in deep agony and pain. She poured all of this time and emotion and her body into this cute musician boy, just to realize she didn’t matter.

“‘Shapes of Thi—’” Keith began quietly.

Jeff cut him off. “Y/N, I seriously refuse to believe you’re okay. Please, just let me help y—” he started.

“Jeff! I’m fine! Seriously,” Y/N raised her voice a little, annoyed at the nagging.

“But you seem—” Jim began, barely perceptible.

“Oh my God, Jim, I’m fine!” Y/N shouted. “I don’t care. It’s done, it’s over.”

The three men sat in silence after Y/N’s sudden outburst of anger, which was very out of character for her. She quickly realized what she had done.

“I’m so sorry for lashing out on you guys. That was uncalled for, it’s not your fault. I’m gonna go to the loo, excuse me,” she said quickly, walking out of the scene before anyone could call after her.

~~~~~~~~

Y/N stayed in the bathroom for all of rehearsals, and she finally reemerged right before the broadcast was about to start, looking as fresh as she did when she got there. It was as if the news was never even brought to her attention.

She refused to make eye contact with Paul through the entire performance, even though it was apparent that he tried to get her attention with his eyes. Chris was just confused that she wouldn’t even dare to glance at Paul. Just a little trouble in paradise that he didn’t know about maybe?

After the show and when the band went offstage, Jeff went back into the crowd to check on Y/N and brought her backstage.

“You have to confront him,” Jeff pleaded.

“I don’t want to,” Y/N whined.

“You have to, or else he’ll bloody win! You don’t want that, and I sure as hell don’t want that for you either! He is the one at fault. You have every right to fuck him up for it.”

Jeff’s little speech gave her an impulsive boost of confidence.

“Fine. I’ll do it. Get everyone out of the room, though,” Y/N stated firmly, beginning to march down the hallway behind Jeff.

Momentarily, Jeff went into the room and rounded up Keith, Jim, and Chris, and filed them down the hallway into another room orderly.

As Y/N was about to enter the room, Jeff whispered in her ear, “Good luck, kid. Knock ‘em dead.” Y/N smiled at Jeff before entering the room and closing the door behind her.

~~~~~~~~

Paul warmly smiled at Y/N as she entered the room.

“Hello, love,” he said gently, “how did you enjoy the show?”

Y/N painted on the most genuine smile she could force. “It was...almost perfect.”

Paul’s eyebrow quirked as he smiled in a confused way. “Why almost?”

“I don’t think rehearsals went as well as I had planned,” Y/N replied smoothly.

“Why? Did something bad happen to you? You’re speaking in riddles, dear.”

“Oh, I apologize,” Y/N snickered, “it’s actually so funny that you bring up riddles, because that seemed to be the exact problem at hand.”

“What does that mean? Did someone tell you something you couldn’t figure out?” Paul chuckled, “You’re confusing me.”

“I figured out that you would be going home to your wife next week.”

All the colour from Paul’s face was drained in a millisecond, and his originally jovial expression was gone. It was as if someone punched him in the gut.

“Who...who told you?” he asked, panicked.

Y/N was taken aback. “I find out I’m your side-chick and you have the audacity to ask who told me? Not an ‘I’m so sorry that I lied to you and broke your heart, Y/N’?”

Paul huffed. “And you expect me to just keep my composure when someone of your gravity walks into the room for the first time? I really am sorry, Y/N, I truly, truly am, but—”

Y/N’s calm and quiet demeanor had left the building at that point. She was mad. Really mad.

“But what? You tell me how in love you are with me, and how I’m your one and only forever, just to realize that I didn’t matter? I’m going to be eighteen years old in March. Eighteen. What do I know about love? Nothing, absolutely nothing. And you chose to take full advantage of my emotional vulnerability.”

“But you did matter. You’re so special to me, Y/N. Don’t you understand that?”

“Don’t you understand that you have a wife? You never loved me. I was never special to you. I was just another fling. But you won’t admit it to yourself.”

“The life of a travelling musician is extremely difficult, Y/N, and you don’t get that,” Paul said severely.

“And that shouldn’t be used as an excuse. You know what? We’re done. Whatever this ‘thing’ is, is over. I wish you the best,” Y/N concluded as she walked out the door and sternly shut it.

The nightmare was over and Y/N was a free agent.

Before she could debrief about her experience with any of the other Yardbirds, Y/N left the venue, caught the first taxi home, ran up into her room, and cried herself to sleep.

~~~~~~~~

22 April 1966

Y/N found recovery time and solace in those two months without Paul. She didn’t go to any Yardbirds gigs, but she sporadically met up with Jeff, Keith, Jim, and Chris at a pub or restaurant to catch up over a meal and drinks. Chris had recently mentioned to her that they were playing in London on the 22nd, and if she felt comfortable, she could attend for free and get backstage to hang out.

Y/N said she’d have to think about it, but she’d definitely consider it.

She had realized over the course of two months that she was not truly in love with Paul. Yes, she fancied him, but she must’ve mistaken the feeling of being genuinely in love with the person for being in love with the situation. Y/N concluded that this relationship was the equivalent of living out one’s childhood dreams of a romance with their schoolgirl crush.

She decided that she was retired from dating for a long time, especially because of how this shitshow ended, but a miniscule piece of her wondered when and how she’d meet her other half.

In the afternoon on the day of the show, which was to be played at the Wimbledon Palais, Y/N made the reckless decision to take a trip down to the Yardbirds’ hotel, but not for the reason you might expect.

Y/N never got the chance to thank Jim McCarty for coming clean about Paul’s infidelity to his wife by “dating” her, and to formally apologize for ripping him at the Ready, Steady, Go! rehearsals. She felt bad for being so dismissive of him, because he was always so nice to her and apparently seemed to care more about her wellbeing than Paul ever did.

Y/N stood on the platform of the train station anxiously, meticulously scheming in her mind about what she would say to Jim to truly and genuinely express her gratitude. She thought about how the encounter would go all the way to London, and all the way on her walk to the hotel.

When she arrived at the hotel, she greeted the concierge, and took the elevator to what she believed to be the Yardbirds’ floor. She took an educated guess as to which room Jim’s would be, just by what she had seen in past times. Y/N took a deep breath before knocking on the door.

When the door opened, she realized that in her best interest, her guess was correct.

“Hi,” she greeted breathily, her fingers interlaced together in front of her timidly.

“Hi,” Jim smiled. After a short moment of awkward silence, he continued, “Um, what are you doing here? Not that it’s a bad thing, which it’s not, but…” he trailed off.

“I just wanted to tell you something that I think needed to be said in-person,” Y/N said quickly.

Jim raised his eyebrows in surprised delight. “Oh, okay.” He moved out of the way of the doorframe so Y/N could enter the room, then shut the door gently behind her. “Welcome to my humble abode,” he chuckled, “make yourself at home.”

Y/N smiled and thanked him graciously, but shyly, as she sat down at a small couch at the edge of the bed. Jim was quick to follow her actions.

Y/N took a deep breath before beginning, “I just wanted to thank you for informing me about Paul in February. I know, it’s been a really long time since then… but I’ve needed some time to myself to think and refocus and recuperate, y’know?”

Jim just laughed. “You came all the way here to thank me? That’s so nice of you. You didn’t need to do that.”

Y/N grinned. “I don’t know, I felt this obligation for some reason. And in addition, I wanted to apologize for lashing out at you as well. I was just shell-shocked, I guess, and I unfairly took it out on you and Jeff.”

“If I forgave you then, I’ll still forgive you now,” Jim smiled, “don’t sweat it. In all honesty, I was surprised at how well you took the news.”

“I just wanted to be as calm and composed as possible,” Y/N blushed, “but obviously I didn’t get very far, did I?” Jim laughed at Y/N’s little jab at herself.

“Well, you’re so quiet, at least you showed a piece of your inner self that night,” Jim teased. Y/N just beamed at him.

“You know, since I owe you, now… I guess I just need to live a little, y’know? I have this introverted shell I need to break out of someday, and I might as well start now,” Y/N offered with a chuckle. “So, with that being said, let me do something for you. Anything you want.”

“Oh no, that’s too much. You didn’t even cause me any grief,” Jim retaliated playfully, “thank you, Y/N, but I think you’re overthinking this whole situation.”

“Please,” she continued with a pleading voice, “I feel awful, and plus, if it makes you feel better, you’ll be helping me clear my conscience. Jim, I’ll do anything you want, no matter how crazy… I’ll take you jet-skiing, I’ll ride on a bike in a bikini when the temperature is below freezing, I’ll clean your kitchen… anything you want me to do, I will do.”

Jim grinned at the bizarre options Y/N gave him before contemplating her invocation for a moment. Anything, huh?

“Kiss me.”

“You said you'd do anything, no matter how crazy, yes?” Y/N didn't get a chance to finish, as Jim interrupted her with a hand at her wrist, and a flinty look in his eyes, that gazed right into hers.

“I did.”

“Well,” Jim continued, stepping ever-closer to the young woman in front of him. She looked just as beautiful as she always had, if not more. Jim was convinced she was perfect, and wanted to protect her. To treat her right, the way she deserved. “You could get on your knees, in front of me.”

Kneeling down on the carpeted floor, Y/N looked up at him through her eyelashes, and the glint in her eyes made his knees weak. She looked almost shy, and he couldn't help but send a comforting smile her way.

“Have you done this before, Y/N?”

She shook her head at this, and looked down, almost embarrassed. Jim, heart pounding in his chest in anticipation, reached out a hand to lift her head. Her eyes held trust, and a hint of nervousness, but her lips quirk up in a smile, her cheeks flushing.

“I’ll walk you through it, love.” The sound of a belt clinking to the floor reached Y/N’s ears, zipper following suit, and she couldn’t help the way she almost thrummed with anticipation. Her parents had warned her against exactly this type of thing. Musicians were, according to her parents, a fickle breed, who only wanted her for her looks and body. It hurt to think of it now, when Jim was being nothing but a gentleman to her. She wanted to break out of her shell, and maybe this was the way to do it.

Y/N looks to Jim and sees him exposed, fully hard now, and her cheeks erupt into shades of rosy pink. He was big, much bigger than she would have expected, and she smiled up at him.

“Okay, love. Open your mouth.” Y/N opened her mouth, sinking it over his tip, which elicits a strained moan, full of pleasure. His hand landed in Y/N’s hair, fingers clenching gently around the tresses. The light tug Y/N felt only spurred her on.

“That’s incredible, princess. Now, try and circle your tongue. You’re doing so well.”

Y/N did as she’s told, and it’s like a spell was put over the man. He craned his head back, neck bared, as soft whimpers fell past his lips. Growing more confident, knowing now what he liked, she let her teeth rake over him lightly, which worked more moans from him, almost breathless in his euphoria.

With a murmured “fuck,” he comes, Y/N’s name the only thing on his lips. She slowly released him from her mouth, wiping her lips with the back of her hand as she stood. Jim, leaning up against the wall, was in bliss, heaving breaths and ruffling Y/N’s hair as she approached.

“That was… you're perfect, princess. Absolutely perfect.”

Y/N laughs, smile nearly splitting her cheeks, and she pressed even closer, pressing her lips to his in a soft, content embrace. She could taste the sweat on his lips, and she couldn't help but think that she could definitely get used to this feeling.

Jim revelled in the feel of her soft lips against his, and he was struck by the thought that this is exactly where he’s supposed to be. He’s where he wants to be, beside Y/N.

————

Taglist: @blood-on-blood @reincarnated70sbaby